#I married him and I still love this man to this day
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loves-alibi · 2 days ago
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or: you married a butcher, not a martyr.
MDNI simon "ghost" riley x f!reader word count: 2.7k warnings: mentions of sex, mentions of torture, reader is hashtag depressed, mentions of death (assumed death), simon is a weirdo at the end <3
*****
He’s a butcher, an apprentice actually. Every Monday through Saturday, regulars flock to the shop, where Simon, the gentle giant behind the counter, takes their order with a smile. Kids love him, always excited to see the man who tells droll jokes when their mothers, who are more interested in the way he winks at them after throwing in an extra quarter of a pound of meat, aren’t listening.
Simon is the talk of the block. Every nosy soul wants to know his deal. It’s not like he came out of nowhere. Simon was born and raised on the streets of Manchester, but there’s an intrigue about the young man that was never tapped into until he took up working at that shop, chopping and slicing up people’s dinners while asking 'how's the family?’.
So it’s no surprise when one day an old lady, a regular at the establishment, asks Simon, elbow-deep in raw lamb, if he’s single.
After breaking the news that he wouldn’t like to make a habit of dating customers, she explains that her granddaughter (“She’s about your age and– you’ll see –she’s the prettiest girl in all of England.”) is in town.
Before he even thinks, the woman scribbles on her receipt for three lamb chops an address and 8pm.
Eight hours later he stands outside of her house, a bouquet of flowers in hand and the receipt folded neatly in his back pocket. Before he has the chance to ring the bell, the door flies open, bombarding Simon with the scent of roasting meat and floral perfume. Standing barely at his chest height is the woman from the shop. She calls a name, and round the corner comes her granddaughter.
Simon almost drops the bouquet in his hands. Your grandmother really didn’t lie about how lovely you are. Even as you abscond her (“You didn’t tell me he was actually coming tonight!”) Simon can’t stop staring at you.
Dinner goes by as awkwardly as you could have expected. Your grandmother sits at the head of the table, you and Simon at opposite sides, kicking each other awkwardly each time either of you crossed or uncrossed your legs. She prompts you two with conversation starters.
Darling, tell him about your job.
Simon, I hear you have a brother.
It’s like pulling teeth. The whole night Simon is kicking himself for not meeting you elsewhere, where he could make a real and good impression without watching eyes. It’s over, he thinks when you finally pull the plug on the evening, dismissing Simon with the excuse that you have to work early the next morning. It’s a shame, he really thought that, despite everything, you two had a connection. There were enough fleeting glances and shy smiles from you for Simon to really believe.
You at least have the decency to walk him to the door, thanking him for entertaining your grandmother and for being such polite company. And, with a glance over your shoulder confirming that the coast is clear, you pull Simon in by the lapels for a kiss, it’s chaste and quick, but has Simon’s chest heaving up and down.
“There’s a pub down the street, you know it?” You ask. Simon nods his head dumbly, his lips still tingling. “She goes to sleep early. Meet me there in an hour, yeah?”
He practically skips to the pub. He orders two pints and waits and why did he order you a pint? It'll be warm by the time you get here and he doesn’t even know if you like beer. This was such a bad idea, you’re probably not even going to–
Fifty-two minutes later you walk through the door, chest heaving and hair tousled. You ran. You really ran to see him.
As you down your pint, he sends a silent thank you to whoever answered his prayers because– wow –you’re here and even more beautiful than he could imagine, with a bead of beer slipping out of the corner of your mouth and dripping down your neck.
The next morning, you two wake up naked in Simon’s bed with headaches and a ring on your finger– his nan’s ring to be precise, the one she explicitly told him to give only to the girl. There’s a voice in the back of his head that says he should be mad to have given it away in a drunken stupor to some girl he just met. But then you laugh, saying, “I’m engaged.” And he laughs with you, a sinking feeling telling him that drunk Simon may have gotten it right.
Simon watches you observe the ring glitter in the morning sun. “Do you want to be?”
You scrunch your nose at the question. “Depends,” you say, dragging out the final ‘s’. Simon blanches. “What’s your last name?” You ask, scrutinizing him.
Simon loses his breath as he stares into your eyes. You’re laying naked, halfway on top of him, and yet it’s the way you look at him that makes his world tilt. He barely manages to stutter out, “R–Riley. Simon Riley.”
“Riley… Mrs. Riley.” Your features soften. “Yeah, I think I want to be.”
In three months, you’re married. It’s a real, proper wedding with both sides of the family there. Simon washes the sinew and blood from his hands and gets all dressed up. He’d pick his bloody apron over a suit any day, but the smile on your face when you see him down the aisle is enough to make getting all dolled up worth it.
Your grandmother dies a happy woman shortly after your wedding. She leaves you the house and well wishes for your future (and with the request to name her future great-grandchildren after her).
Marriage suits Simon. He leaves you for work each morning before the sun is up. You wake hours later to a cold bed yet a warm cup of coffee in the kitchen. He comes home at five o’clock on the dot with a pound of meat cut and ready to cook, which he does. It fills some caveman-basal part of him– the ability to provide for his wife, melting away his worries every time you sigh in delight at the taste of the meal he oh so lovingly set out for you.
Three days after your first anniversary, Simon comes home with a pamphlet. Her Royal Majesty's Armed Service. You laugh, tell him there’s no way he wants to enlist. He almost believes you, sounding so sure in your words. Maybe he is being ridiculous, but then he turns on the news and sees the chaos of the world and realizes that chopping meat wasn’t all he was meant for.
He sits you down again. This time you don’t laugh.
“You will not make me a widow, you understand?”
“Of course not.”
“Promise?”
“I promise, love.”
He enlists, joins the infantry, and you wonder if you made a mistake marrying that man. Then 30 weeks later, he comes back and you almost forget the heartache until he’s standing right in front of you, this time without a pound of meat and the smell of blood clinging to his skin.
He fucks you. You fuck him. It’s only natural after so long. He’s missed you. You’ve missed him. And you have plenty of frustration to get out.
It’s when you’re laying in bed, fingers trailing his abs– yes, abs, born out of the weeks of grueling work– that it strikes you how much this means for you. You squeeze what used to be the loving layer of pudge that circled his waist.
“You like it?” he asks, his smirk pressing against your head.
But the energy to lie doesn’t exist in you. You tell him no, that you miss the Simon that walked out of your door thirty weeks ago, that– sure –abs are nice but you liked the Simon with a little fat, that you didn’t want him to do this, that you didn’t want to have to waste away, alone and worrying about him.
Yelling ensues. You cry. Simon cries. You sleep in the guest room. Simon sleeps on the couch.
He’s a good soldier, you learn. Not from him of course, Simon’s too humble to brag about his achievements like that (plus, he’s afraid that his growing accolades would just remind you how you never wanted to marry a decorated soldier, you wanted to marry him). You always come to base to pick him up from deployments. Soldiers give you respectful nods and tell you how good of a sergeant your husband is.
You and Simon had a distinct separation between work and life. As soon as your car is through the base gates, not a word is spoken of his deployments. It always gets you in too much of a fit. So it was agreed upon: you didn’t have to hear about it.
Until one day, work shows up to your front door step. Simon’s on a deployment, and you’re finally unwinding after a long day of your own. As you begin to pour a glass of wine, there’s a clinical knock on the door.
Two men in uniform are on your porch. They hold their hats in their hands, as with solemn voices they try to explain it all to you. It’s strange– you don’t cry. They ask if you need anything and you simply say no. After all, what could they give you– Simon? You have a chuckle at that after you finally send the soldiers off.
You continue your normal routine: finish that second glass of wine, tidy up the house, and cook dinner. You burn your thumb on the cast iron pot. With your finger in your mouth to soothe the burn, you think to dial your grandmother’s number. If anybody needs to know about Simon, it’s her. Except, when you dial her number all you get is a robotic voice explaining that the number you are trying to reach is not available.
Oh, you realize, that’s right– nan’s dead!
You lose it on the kitchen floor. Your sobs are so loud, the neighbors come to check on you. They find you right there on the kitchen floor, dinner burning on the stove, and paperwork from the army on the counter.
People treat you like a widow after that. You don’t consider yourself one. It just doesn’t feel right. He left without a goodbye, and now you’re supposed to accept that he’s gone?
You’re a celebrity around town– poor Simon’s widow. You quit your job, the widow’s pension being enough to get you by for now. Simon’s old boss starts giving you cuts for free– not even the shitty ones. You get filet mignons from him, aged wines from neighbors, extra pastries from the bakery, and pitying stares from strangers.
In three years you went from a complete stranger to Simon Riley’s widow. Three years and that man tore your life apart. The six month mark is approaching. It’s funny, really. That’s twice the time it took for you two to get hitched.
There isn’t even a body to bury, only a plain gravestone with his name and dates. You don’t visit it. There’s no point. What’s there to mourn? Instead you dig a hole in your back garden. It isn’t very deep, and the garden’s long dead. You don’t dare touch the shovel, it had been Simon’s– used when you needed a hole dug for flowers or bushes. Instead the hole is dug with your bare hands, like a dog searching for something.
In the pathetic pit in that dead garden, you put your ring– the one Simon gave you, that his nan gave him –wrapped in his apron.
The backyard burial doesn’t make you feel better. It just puts dirt under your nails that won’t wash away no matter how hard you scrub at it.
You consider selling the house. That leads to another breakdown. You were supposed to raise your kids there– Simon’s kids. Nan wanted you and Simon to have that house. Now nan’s gone. Simon’s gone. But for some reason you’re left to wander the ruins.
Six months finally comes. People stopped giving you free shit by month three. It’s not like you ever wanted their gifts. It’d come to you with a smile and some bullshit about how we get it or we’re here for you. You laugh at the notion when you wake up on the six month anniversary of your fucking husband’s death alone and…
It’s not the anniversary. Not the real one, at least. It’s only been six months since those men showed up at your door, like the grim reaper dressed up for Queen Elizabeth. He had to have died some time before then.
You don’t even know when your husband died.
It has to be on the paperwork they gave you. Six months after however many days since your husband’s death, you tear apart your house. Every drawer is pulled out, every cabinet yanked open in the hopes that you can find the paperwork that has Simon RIley’s death date.
Not on the pension form.
Not on the letter from the crown.
Not on the invitation to the fucking widow’s club.
When the hell did he die?
You fall asleep in the wee hours of the morning, surrounded by every piece of paperwork you could locate. It’s still dark when you wake up, mind clouded with exhaustion. You almost fall back asleep right there on the floor, but when you let your head fall back down on the hardwood, you feel rhythmic vibrations travel through the wood to your cheek. Footsteps.
“Love?”
Only one man has ever called you that.
It’s like you lose the ability to speak. Any thought you could have dies on your tongue as two familiar arms wrap themselves around your waist, pulling you into a lap. He holds you on the floor, lets you cry it out until the sun comes up.
The first words to come out of your mouth: “You said you wouldn’t make me a widow.”
He holds you tighter, “And I didn’t.”
Simon doesn’t tell you what happened. All you know is that he had been taken, tortured, and somehow rescued. 
He looks different. He’s gots lots of scars now. They bother him, he covers up in long shirts and pants more often than not, no matter how much you tell him he doesn’t need to. He says that he doesn’t want to worry you with them.
It’s not the scars that worry you. Simon’s different. Whatever happened to him back there had made him needy. He doesn’t let you out of his sight. At night, you’re adhered to his side by an impossibly strong grip. He whispers in his sleep, don’t leave me, as though you could possibly escape his iron grip. Maybe needy isn’t the right word. Obsessive, more like.
He digs the ring up just like you did– all bare hands and fury. You don’t know how he found it– you never told him. You just wake up one morning to him pawing furiously at the ground. He pulls it out and presents it to you like a cat with a dead mouse. He puts the ring on your finger before even rinsing the dirt off.
In bed he consumes you. Where once sex was fun and playful, it now is a ritual, like Simon is claiming you. It’s enjoyable, yes, but overwhelming. You don’t think he blinks anymore. It’s like he’s worried you’re going to be ripped away from him, like every time is the last time.
Two months after he comes home, papers arrive for him in the mail. He’s being deployed again. You’re worried. It’s too soon. You can’t lose him again, and you tell him as much.
Simon placates your worries with a kiss on the head. As he pulls you into a hug, he utters, “Love, I crawled out of the grave for you once. You best bet I’ll do it again.”
Somehow, you don’t think he’s lying.
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wannabepoeticischiya · 2 days ago
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all the colors of the sun
ao3: all the colors of the sun pairing: karasu tabito x f! reader genre: romance wc: 17.6k status: one shot
You don't need to wish for love or for someone to love you. Because… sometimes, you just never realize that you've had them all along.
And if he were to put it into words, he'd tell her: “And ya don’t need to wish for him to love you…”
Because he already does.
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“No way in hell did Karasu get a girlfriend before me!” Otoya protests, voice laced with all the stinging sensations of envy as he, Isagi, and Yukimiya huddled together like the Avengers if the superhero group was the type to peek at people from around a corner.
The object of their interest? None other than the assassin, Karasu Tabito—talking animatedly to a girl all the while looking like he just won the World Cup, saved the universe, and had gotten married all in the same day. His smile was very annoyingly wide, and his laughter sounded so happy that it scratched the ears of his very envious teammates.
"Maybe he’s just being nice to a fan," Yukimiya offered, though the model himself couldn’t stop the bitterness from tagging along with his words. He swears he could almost taste it.
“Karasu?” Otoya questions incredulously.
“Nice?” Isagi follows.
“Ha! The only way Karasu and nice belong in the same sentence is if the word isn’t is in between,” Chigiri remarks, arms crossed as he leaned against the opposite wall, silently judging his teammates—who were very keenly drawing nearer and nearer to the borders of looking like electric posts if they could pull the We Bare bears pose—from their spot in the corner.
“Why’re you guys talking about him anyway?” Chigiri asks, sipping casually on his energy drink.
“Look at him, Chigirin!” Bachira’s head popped up from behind the trio like a Whac-A-Mole, pointing dramatically at the crow in the crowd. “Karasu’s talking to a girl!”
Chigiri chokes mid-sip, spilling his drink all over his hands and on the floor from absolute mortification. “He’s what?!”
"Whatcha guys yellin' for? Yer gonna get us in trouble if ya don't keep it down—"
“Hiori! Look at your childhood friend!” Isagi whispers in alarm, as if the scene he’s been watching unfold before his eyes for the last five minutes is nothing but fever-induced hallucinations.
"He ain't my childhood friend,” Hiori mutters, rubbing the back of his neck in annoyance that he had to clear this up, again. “If anythin’ he’s—”
Tired of Hiori’s stalling, Isagi shoved the Ice Man’s face in the direction of their crime-committing teammate.
“[Name]-san?” Hiori mumbles in surprise, blinking repeatedly as if the scene before him was something out of this world. Well, he should’ve expected this considering… well, considering them.
“You know her, Hiorin?” Bachira pokes his head from Yukimiya's side, curiosity all over his honey-colored eyes.
“Yeah,” he breathes, still struggling to process the image, “She’s…” his words faded to a dull echo. It’s only been a few months since he last saw them together. There wasn’t anything unusual, same old Karasu, same old [Name], still laughing and talking like they were the only two people in the world. They’ve always looked like that. Always looked at each other like that. So how come seeing them now… how did they look so different? Almost as if they were…
“In love.” He whispers.
“What?!” The peepers—minus Yukimiya—screamed in unison, garnering a few odd stares from the people walking by.
“What I meant,” Hiori clears his throat, “is that she’s Karasu-kun’s childhood friend.” Hiori smiles, “She’s also ridiculously strong.”
“Can’t be stronger than Karasu, right?” Otoya asks, his eyes giving way to the bubbles of whatever evil plan it was that he was concocting in his head.
“Oh, I ain’t sure.” Hiori shrugs, “But from all the fights they had that I can remember, she never lost a single one."
Hiori caught sight of the smirk on Otoya’s face growing wider, and if he were to push it, Hiori was certain that Otoya would was going to tear his jaw open from it.
Amused by the ninja’s shamelessness, Hiori imparts a very much needed word of wisdom.
"If she and Karasu-kun were to fight for real right now, she would still win.” He laughs, not quite liking the sudden image of Karasu’s bruised face from long ago showing up in his head, “and that's with Karasu-kun burnin' all the candles at every end."
Otoya’s suggestive expression wilted like a rose at the new information, stepping behind Yukimiya all of a sudden.
Wanting to see how far he could go, Hiori hummed and pretended to think deeper, “I think she does kickboxing—or was it karate? Well, doesn’t matter. Yer screwed either way, Otoya-kun.” Hiori pats Otoya’s shoulder as he walks past the group of terrified teenagers, “Best not to try!” He calls, waving his hand in farewell.
As he walks away, snickering softly to himself as he noted the look from his teammate’s faces. He remembers the day those two met, a moment in time so engraved in his head it felt kind of strange to see how much had changed.
Or maybe… just maybe, nothing’s changed at all.
---
"Didja lose your partner?"
A younger [Name] stood in front of a boy crouched by the bike rack near the curve, popsicle in hand as the other scratched the back of her neck—craning her head to see if anyone was around the corner.
[Name] tried to catch his eye, shamelessly offering the half-eaten treat to him when he ignored her question.
Met by his silence, she steps closer to him, setting her bag next to his yellow hat as she crouches down to try and get a glimpse of his face.
"Oi," she calls again, waving a sticky hand in front of his face. "Can ya hear me?"
The boy hides his face further in the comforts of his arms, swatting away her hand without a word.
[Name] furrowed her brows at his dismissal, pouting at him even if he couldn’t see.
What’s this kid’s deal? She thought.
Just as she was about to get back up and walk away, she heard him—albeit very soft that could be mistaken for the wind—whimper.
He wasn’t upset at her or anything, but he just didn’t know what else to do at the moment, so he couldn’t help but try to push her away. This was the last thing he wanted… for someone to see just how weak he was. He didn’t get partnered up with the girl he wanted, so what? It wasn’t like it was the end of the world. He thought it was the stupidest reason in the world. It shouldn’t be something to be so upset over.
But he was.
To him… getting partnered up with Marisa really, really mattered.
Pained by the sudden reminder, he felt the back of his eyes tingle, silver brimming his downcast gaze.
"H-Hey, c'mon now, don't cry..." [Name] panics, dropping down to eye level with him once more at sight of the tears streaming down his very sad face. Mindlessly, she thrusts the melting, half-eaten popsicle to him like an offering, like the spirit of summer could magically solve all his problems.   
She pats his back awkwardly, "I lost my partner, too." She blurted, her voice colored in cheer and laughter, as though the matter of losing a buddy on a school field trip was a funny story they can share for life.   
The reason for Karasu's sadness was a very different matter altogether, still, he appreciated his classmate's efforts. Her kind, and frantic energy pulling at the corners of his lips even by the smallest centimeter.   
"Hio-kun prolly made it back to the teacher, maybe your partner is there!" She smiles at him, like there was no surer thing in the whole wide world aside from her optimism. She extended a hand for him to take. "Let's go back, Nakimushi-san!"
"I'm not a crybaby!" He snaps, finally looking—more like glaring—at her through watery eyes, "And the name's Karasu. Karasu Tabito!" (believe it!)
"Okay, Tabito-chan!" She beams, one so bright it made him squint.
Before he could reprimand her for her actions, she plopped the matching yellow hat back onto his head, the brim settling crookedly as her sticky fingers lingered for a second too long. She adjusted the straps of her red backpack and looked to him in anticipation.
"Don't go calling me by my first name like we're close or somethin’!" He yells, flustered at the thought of a girl being all chummy with him.
"Sure thing, Tabito-chan!" She replies, completely ignoring his protests as she drags him by his hand and led him back to rest of the group.
---
That was how they became friends.
According to the testimony of Hiori Yo—who was originally [Name]’s assigned partner—she was seen ditching him half-way when caught sight of an ice cream store, and somewhere along the way got wired with a crying kid on the sidewalk.
From that day onward, they just sort of… stuck together
---
At eight years old, [Name] discovered Karasu’s secret, as much as a secret it could be but… what she unveiled was his crush on Marisa—the resident cutest kid in class, according to him.
It wasn’t intentional. [Name] blamed it on Karasu. It was completely by accident.
She went to his house one Saturday morning to return the ball he had left by mistake last night when he came over her house to play.
His older sister, Tsubame-nee-chan, who looked just like Tabito but with longer hair and a kinder attitude, had told [Name] that her best friend was upstairs. She was so used to having the girl come over that it started to become weird when there wasn’t any laughter and banter in the house.
“Tabito’s upstairs,” Tsubame waves from the living room, laughing at something her friends said. “Ya can just grab him yerself!”
Muttering a faint, ‘Pardon the intrusion’, taking off her slippers, and a ‘Thanks, Tsubame-nee-chan!’, [Name] climbed the steps, no limit to her usual buzzing energy.
But the second her foot closed the last step of the stairs, she halted.
[Name] caught sight of Karasu at the far end of the corridor, standing in front of the full-length mirror he probably used more than his sister—or anyone in his house for that matter. The boy hadn’t taken note of her presence just yet, seemingly immersed at whatever it was that he was doing that merited his undivided attention and spatial awareness.
She tilted her head in curiosity and breathed to call out to him.
And with little to no warning at all, his voice broke through like thunderstorms.
"Marisa, I like you," he tells his reflection, flushing red from the weight of his own words.
[Name] gasped, her jaw dropping to the center of the earth—the surprise simmering in her soul that it had frozen her over where she stood, causing her grip on the soccer ball to loosen. The ball slipped from her hands, descending step by step down the stairs, sounding like a drumroll for impending doom.
The sound had Karasu whipping his head in her direction looking like roadkill. Blushing, in the nicest word; lovesick in the worst.
"YOU LIKE MARI—!"
Karasu, in sheer mortification, bolted toward her, yanking her away from the stairs and slapped a sweaty palm over her mouth before she could blacken his name in his own household. His heart racing faster than when he stayed past curfew and had to go home knowing his mom was waiting for him by the door with a slipper.
“Shaddap!” He hisses, voice barely above a whisper as he glances around like a criminal.
Meanwhile, downstairs, in the living room, Tsubame glanced at the direction of the stairs—noting the series of thuds and muffled and restrained yelling—raising a questioning brow as it had her pausing mid-laugh. A minute of silence ensued after that, so she immediately concludes that it was probably nothing… hopefully.
Those two were always loud and rough and chaotic, there existed no day where she could describe them with just two of those adjectives, and frankly, it would never work anyway. Where there was loudness there was chaos, and all the other matches.
Besides, her brother was a soccer player, and [Name] was a karate practitioner.
Totally normal.
Back upstairs, Karasu dragged [Name] into his room like she was a dead body he was desperately trying to hide.
When he was sure that the door was slammed shut and that no other human on earth could possibly lo and behold his newly discovered secret, only then did he let her go. He knew full well that as he stands there all red-faced, heart pumping, colored in all the shades of horror for his impending fate, shoulders heaving as he struggles to regain his composure… Karasu Tabito was never gonna hear the end of her teasing.
And it began the moment [Name] stood up, dusted the dust from her clothes, and looked at him with the most skin-crawling smile to ever graze humanity. “Sooo… Marisa, ey?” She jabs his side with her elbow, her smile growing impossibly wider.
Karasu groans, sliding dramatically against the door like a telenovela star as he hides his face behind his hands. “Yer absolutely not allowed to tell anyone!” he commands, glaring at her from where he was, trying to act all big and scary but failing in [Name]’s eyes since he was far too red-faced like a stoplight to be considered a threat. “’Specially not my sister! She’d tease me and I’d be forced to hit the grave early.”
"Don'tcha worry, Tabito-likes-Marisa, yer secret’s safe with me!" [Name] salutes dramatically, a certain twinkle in her eyes as if his wishes were a heaven-sent mission to their strongest soldier.
Karasu let out an exasperated sigh, ruffling his hair in frustration—already beginning to count the days that remained of his secret.
"So...” She started, leaning closer to him with a mischievous smile, “Whatcha like about her, Tabi-chan?" [Name] teases, wiggling her eyebrows while she was at it, poking his reddening cheeks at the reminder of the pretty girl from class.
His face erupted in all the shades of red—if it was even possible. [Name]’s prodding wasn’t helping his racing heart one bit, in fact, it only made him feel like his own organ was trying to break down his rib cage and run as far away as possible.
He wasn’t getting away from this—not unscathed—so might as well fess up.
"Well, she's really cute." Karasu admits, a tiny, soft smile painting his expression.
[Name] nodded enthusiastically, leaning closer in anticipation. But Karasu remained silent, he was just smiling there like an idiot staring off into yonder.
"What?" he asks as he took note of the unimpressed expression on his friend's face.
"Ya mean that's it?" she deadpans, all the happiness draining from her face at the sight of Karasu's lenient expression speaking volumes far more than when he spoke the words—"Should there be more?"
"Oi! I always thought ya weren't the sharpest tool in the shed, but I didn't know yer stupidity was this high—OW!" [Name] yelps as Karasu karate-chopped the top of her head, effectively drawing the curtains to her insults to a close.
[Name] glared at him, eyes reflecting the thought: you dare use my own spells against me?
"You don't get a say!” He protests, crossing his arms over his chest defensively. “Ya never liked anyone but the neighborhood cat!"
Because for the life of him, no matter how many kanji he learned to read or write, he was certain he couldn't convey a hundredth of Marisa's beautiful qualities.
"Liking someone is dumb!" she shot back, wincing as she rubs the top of her head to ease the ache. She was certain she'd develop all the necessary dodging maneuvers from her friend alone.
"Of course, ya'd think that you gorilla." Karasu laughs as he leaned over to pull at [Name]'s cheeks just to annoy her further.
The small conversation was something only the two of them shared. Lost under the stars of all their laughter and the echoes of their smiles… forever just theirs to keep.
Karasu never confessed his feelings for Marisa in the entirety of elementary school, or ever for that matter. And [Name], surprisingly true to her word, kept his secret well, a secret.
That’s why it came as a surprise.
It was the day of their elementary school graduation.
Tabito and [Name] stood next to each other as his sister took their photo, saying that they were one step closer to ‘reaching the age of maturity’ as she had so cryptically put it. Because what on earth could she mean by that? They were plenty mature. It didn’t help that she was smiling weirdly at the two of them while she was at it.
But the biggest shock of the day wasn’t Tsubame-nee-chan’s sudden teasing, no. It was something entirely different.
Marisa called to Tabito just as their class had finished capturing a photo together. [Name] hardly had any time to see everything unravel before she was whisked away by the Karate Club to take a picture of their own.
As she caught the last of their shadows from the corner of her eye—Marisa, all smiles and laughing, Karasu, standing looking like he could snap like a taco shell at any moment but hid his situation very well.
For some reason unknown, the sight of them talking rang an unpleasant melody in the caves of [Name]’s chest, rattling the once peaceful solitude.
She blamed it on the pollen. She blamed it on the heat or the cold, whichever was more prominent. She blamed it on… quite literally everything else. Not willing to admit to anything—not when she didn’t even know what the heck this was.
Later that afternoon, when the two found themselves at the beach loitering on the wave breakers by the roadside to watch the sunset, Karasu told [Name] that Marisa—his life-long crush at the time—had confessed to him.
He told it like it was nothing. As if it was no more than an ordinary occasion, like a weather report!
But [Name]’s reaction was a stark contrast to his nonchalance.
The revelation crashed against her like a tidal wave that nearly had her toppling over the concrete barrier, in danger of falling to the sandy shore—a generous twenty-foot drop at least.
Karasu grabbed her by the scruff of her clothes, heart pounding at the sight of her almost falling— “Idiot, be more careful!” He scolds, carding a hand through his ever-growing violet hair.
“MARISA CONFESSED TO YOU?!” [Name] screams, standing up in absolute shock with zero regards that she almost had a close date with the grim reaper a few minutes ago.
"Hey! I already told ya to watch yerself! You'll fall!" Karasu reminds, reaching out to steady her. His brows remained furrowed as he stayed seated on the concrete barrier, only this time, one hand caged her own as his other found anchor on her ankle.
"Whatcha say? Ya better not have told her somethin' stupid! Gosh this is excitin'—"
“I rejected her.”
The world came to a standstill at the resounding echo of his words. But the tides continued to crash against the shores, drawing away not a moment later. The birds’ orchestra flowed like the spring zephyrs as they flew over the vast finiteness of the horizons. Still… [Name] could not feel herself move from her frozen state.
Wasn’t it too sudden? It felt like only yesterday that she discovered his crush for their classmate. Why… why?
Karasu looks to the ocean with a completely calm face, a stark contrast to the slowly rising tides. The sunset painted him golden, like all the stars melted just to color him in this moment.
When he was colored in that light, saturating him in every shade of soothing silence, softening his features… for the first time in forever, Karasu felt unreachable. Like he belonged to a world she had no right to step into. As though he would continue to travel past the borders of the milky way to some unknown universe far beyond what [Name] could comprehend.
When he was painted in all the colors of the sun, it was hard to deny.
It was difficult to fight the fluttering sensation thrumming in her heart—surging in all the forms of power—of happiness.
[Name] tugged on his arm that held her own, urging him to look at her as she asks, "Why?"
Indeed, why?
For as long as [Name] had known him, Karasu's always liked Marisa. He even went as far as to make her swear not to tell a single soul about his infatuation with the girl, not because he was embarrassed, but because he thought far too lowly of himself—believed that he was too ordinary—for someone like Marisa to ever like him back.
"I... well, we're gonna go to different middle schools,” he shrugs, sweeping it under the carpet like it was no big deal. “It would be a long-distance thing ya get me? So I rejected her." He talks about it so easily, always acting that it isn’t eating him up inside.
He was always like this.
Using the hand that held the hand of the girl standing before him, Karasu pulled himself up from his sitting position. He towered over her easily, already breaking past a hundred and seventy centimeters—a reminder that they were growing up—and he was sure to grow taller in the near future.
"Nothin' weird about it,” he comments apathetically. “Completely normal—ow! Hey! What're ya doin'—[Name]!" He hurriedly shielded his arm from [Name]’s aggravated assault.
“Yer an idiot!” she fires at him, her frustration dropping on him like a bomb.
"Ow! [Name]—stop! You hit like a gorilla—ow!" Karasu finally held her thrashing arms, caging her in his hold so she couldn't hit him anymore.
He wasn't sure why [Name] was acting this way, or why she was so upset over this. What he was certainly most certain of is that her punches hurt. They hurt a whole lot.
"You're an idiot..." she echoes.
Karasu tried to look her way, but it proved to be an arduous task as she kept her head down. A few stands of her hair prevented Karasu from discerning what sort of expression was on her face. He hesitantly let her arms go, watching them fall to her side softly.
Karasu poked [Name]'s forehead, pushing her head slightly to get her to look up.
"Hey..." he calls gently, closing the remaining distance between them with a single stride, "Why're ya cryin'?"
[Name] looks to the ocean, aggressively wiping away the traitorous tears that slipped from the shackles of her eyes. She wasn't gonna cry over this. It was stupid.
"You liked Marisa a lot, Tabito."
It took Karasu by surprise that [Name] called him by his first name, free from her usual teasing jeers and awful nicknames—still, he didn't understand why is it that she was so upset by his situation.
"I just..." she begins, glancing at him from the corners of her eyes before sighing and turning to face him, "It was yer chance to be with the one you loved—"
"Oi, oi... love is a strong word for that—" Karasu wanted to complain, to say that it really wasn’t like that, but looking at the saddened expression of his friend, he thought otherwise.
"—and you let the chance go just like that." She admits, her voice threatening to crumble from the heaviness that she felt—and before long, her tears had broken free from their holding cells.
"I know I can't say anythin' to ya cuz I'm a gorilla and I don't like anyone else but Miiko but don'tcha think it's a waste—" Karasu cut her off by wrapping his arm around her form, tangled her in gentleness that stood in great contrast to his usual rough and jagged demeanor.
Because he didn’t like seeing her cry.
He doesn’t like it when other kids make fun of her, even if he knew that she was better equipped to handle them far more than him. He doesn’t like it when she’s sad. And he doesn't like it when she wasn’t around.
[Name] was an irreplaceable figure in his life… and it hurt him just as much that she—that she was sad… and he felt even worse this time because he knew that he was the one who caused it.
"Gettin' a love life ain't everythin' in this world ya know?" he tells her, threading a hand through her hair in a soothing gesture.
[Name] buries her face in his chest, nodding despite knowing that he wouldn't see.
She felt like the world's biggest scumbag. Her best friend in the whole wide world just turned down the girl he liked for so long.  She should've been sad—angry at the world for forcing this fate unto Karasu, to her best friend who was the kindest person on earth. And she was!
Desperately, she tried to convince herself that she was.
But here she was… taking advantage of his kindness. Trying to take more than what she was given.
Because what else could this be? That there was this thrumming sensation in her chest that rejoiced in knowing that Karasu turned Marisa down.
"Hold on, why are you the one cryin'? Shouldn't it be me?" He teased, ruffling the threads of [h/c] that covered her head.
"Idiot!"
---
As the seasons changed and the moon waxed and waned, a good chunk of their time in middle school was spent with Karasu breathing into his soccer career slash club slash obsession, playing alongside Hiori Yo—[Name]’s initial elementary school partner whom she ditched to get ice cream and was later forced to apologize to by her mother—all the while [Name] dedicated hers to Karate.
The two remained as close knit as ever, choosing to wait for whomever had practice the longest so they could walk home together. Spending all breaks and lunches lounging around and glaring at people who looked at them funny. [Name] complaining about chemistry because who the hell would find joy in dragging numbers up and down, sideways and backwards, all over roll over. It was a pain. All she knew was that Protactinium + Nitrogen + Calcium + Potassium + Einsteinium = PaNcaKEs. And that was just about how far her Chemistry braincells could peak.
It didn’t help that Karasu was a wizard when it came to that godawful subject so when it came to helping her with it, tutoring sessions are 5% learning, 3% complaining, with all the rest occupied by his relentless teasing.
A horrible experience.
But for them who had known each other since once upon a time, it was nothing unusual.
Everything the same as ever. Same old science woes. Same old swimming classes despair. Same old faces. Same old Karasu. Same old [Name].
for the majority of middle school, karasu dedicated all his time and effort to soccer—playing along side hiori yo, yn's initial elementary school partner whom she ditched to get ice cream and later apologized for leaving him behind—while yn gave hers to karate. the two best friends remained close as ever. choosing to wait for whomever had practice the longest so they could walk home together. Everything was the same as ever. same old clubs. same old faces. same old karasu. same old yn.
That was until one winter night of their second year of middle school...
[Name] was set to compete for the winter Karate tournament and if she did well, it was one step closer to Nationals.
She trained day in, day out near the field where Karasu played soccer when the school field was out for break.
The soccer player was not privy to her unshakable resolve, even going as far as labeling her—and letting her know—that she was “working so hard like a cow” which he received a kick as thanks.
It was fine during spring—her training that is, even more so in summer, and Karasu would even let it slip in autumn but winter? Winter was a different matter altogether.
For the past days (and even last year), he had told her off for it—scolded her far more times that he would like to admit with a tone laced with all the streamers of irritation and illuminated by the lights of his concern. “Ya gotta stop workin’ yerself so hard like a cow, gorilla girl. You’ll get sick!”
As he makes a move to hit her head like he always did, [Name] dodged and repaid his words with a very kind kick to his side, sending him staggering a few steps away.
"Ya don't get ta lecture me on that, stupid crow! Yer here too, equally as guilty! And don't call me a cow! Or a gorilla!" She points a numb finger in his direction, because even with her stubborn and brutish attitude, it sadly didn't make her immune to the cold.
"Yeah, yeah..." He waved her off with one hand as the other rubbed the spot she kicked.
"But I'm runnin' around so I ain't as cold, but you've just been standin' there for the past thirty minutes, aren'tcha cold?" He quirks a brow at her as he approached her slowly, like a wild predator cautious to scare away his prey.
"Oh, I'm freezin’." She agrees nonchalantly, a mist of white clouds leaving the borders of her lips.
"Act more like it then, idiot." he deadpans, scratching his head in frustration.
"Here," Karasu breathes into his hands moving closer so he could cup her face.
"Woah. Ya really weren't jokin' when ya said yer freezin'" he says in surprise, laughing at his own discovery like it was the most amusing thing in the world. "Are yer hands cold, too?"
He retreated his hands and made a motion to take off his soccer gloves not a moment later, looking at them for a few moments—trying to figure out which hand was right and left, even if they wouldn't matter in the end—before sliding them onto her trembling fingers.
They hung loosely on her despite the Velcro straps going as far as they could possibly go.
Since when did he grow so much?
When she looks away from her hands to thank him, [Name] felt the world around her freeze into place, frosting over like the trees that bordered the field. Light snow descended from the heavens, the last sunrays dipping behind the horizons of the sky as the stars flickered to life one by one.
And then there it was again, that same fluttering feeling from so long ago. Only this time, it set everything in her to flames: her blood rushed far too fast for her head to keep up, lighting the meadows of her face to a vibrant shade of red, setting every hollow and edge into a raging inferno. She felt cold and warm everywhere—like her body couldn't decide if it wanted to burn to ash or forever freeze with winter.
The colors of the night shone in a vibrant light, flowering in circles from the sheer intensity—brighter than the summer sky yet dimmed in comparison next to him—to Tabito who looked at her like she was the only thing in the world, rubbing his hand against his arm to spark heat so he could thaw the frozen wasteland ravaging her soul.
Since when did she begin to see him like this? When did he become so saturated in all the colors of everyday life that he blended in so well?
When... did I start feeling like this?
Don't look at me like that, [Name] wanted to tell him. Don't laugh at me. Don't hold me like this... just don't.
Because if he did—when he does all of this—how was she supposed to fight off this greedy, hungry feeling festering inside her? This needless longing to keep him close to her, to never let him go, to show him all the wonders of the universe... all the colors of the sun, everything that he turned his back on because he believed that he wasn't enough to have any of them.
When he looks at her like that, when he laughs... when he holds her like this—how was she supposed to deny it?
That she was in love with him.
[Name] was in love with Karasu Tabito.
---
When the wave of High School crashed against the two best friends, it brought with it the cruellest game fate could play on [Name].
Marisa… had returned.
The same Marisa she had teased and jeered at Karasu about when they were kids. The same Marisa… Karasu had loved—again, such a strong word—for so long. And she guessed—no matter how much she didn't want to entertain the thought that Karasu could still like the same Marisa from elementary school—he loves even now.
And it nearly killed her inside when she found that her suspicions were true.
It was a week after their first year had begun when Karasu came running from the pitch to meet her halfway, cleats thudding against the grass as she made her way to the bleachers.
"[Name]!" He yells as he ran towards her in full speed it nearly had [Name] contemplate if she should move aside so Karasu doesn't accidentally trample her over. But he ran to her with the biggest smile she had ever seen on him—yes, even happier than the time they won the local tournament—it broke her heart to even think of sidestepping him, even if he did pose as a road hazard from his speed.
"Why'dya hafta feel like ya need to win a marathon, Tabi-chan?" She punches his arm playfully once he skidded to a stop near where she stood (after nearly running her over).
She sets her bag down as she laughed at the sight of Karasu buzzing in excitement. Must be something really important to him if he's this happy about it. Before [Name] could fully turn to face him, he had already grabbed her by the shoulders and started shaking her back and forth. "She's here!" He cheers.
"Who's here?"
"Marisa!"
[Name] felt her heart shatter from the happiness decorating every word that left the orbit of his tongue, shining like the stars that could’ve littered her evening. She should have been happy for him. Really, she should have shared even half the joy he felt from his supposed amazing discovery. She should've... she knew full well that she should.
So why does it remind her exactly of elementary graduation?
When he was whisked away from her by the same girl who she cheered Karasu to pursue? Why does it remind her so much that she wasn't a figure like Marisa in his life? She wasn't the object of his desire. Karasu didn't hold an ounce of romantic affection for her like he did for Marisa. She... [Name]... was just his friend. She was his best friend. And god... did that hurt—that she couldn't be more than that—when all she wanted was to be a little greedier, to have a place in his heart like Marisa did. She couldn't quite understand it... even if she knew deep down that Karasu liked Marisa, that he had her image perched atop a pedestal in the center of his heart, [Name] couldn't be contented with just being his friend.
The one friend who loved him so much.
The one friend... that he couldn't love back.
"Ya hafta help me, [Name]!” His voiced anchored her back to reality. “I know I told ya that gettin' a love life ain't everythin' but now that I actually stand a chance... I—I don't wanna lose it agai... [Name]? You still there?"
Karasu waved a hand over her face, taking note of the expression painted on her face, almost as if she just saw a ghost. "Hello? This is ground control to [Name], are ya still in orbit?"
Through the haze, [Name] watches as Karasu walked around her in circles, poking her cheeks to try and get her back to him—huh, what an easily misunderstood thought.
She blinked, taking in the way he eyes her in confusion, his ridiculously gelled hair remaining immovable even as he prods and scratched his scalp like they held all the answers in the world. Really, it wasn't him who was stupid for trying so hard... it was her.
Because as it stands, she was the one foolish enough to fall for him.
"Oho~ so yer finally mannin' up to ask her out, eh?" she smirks, her facade tugging at the seams of her resolve, pulling at the pieces of her shattered heart. In the silence of his unspoken rejection, she found herself gluing them together, even if they threatened to come apart later. Just a little longer, she would coerce. Just a little more... so that he doesn't find out—so he wouldn't find out—that his feelings... were slowly killing her.
"Don't even start," Karasu holds a hand to her face, he couldn't stomach that teasing shine in her eyes. How long has it been since he last saw that? Far too long he believes, still... he asked himself why he didn't miss it as much as he thought he would've.
Back then, even if it annoyed him to the point of starting a fist fight with [Name]—which he not-so-surprisingly lost every single time—he would secretly be grateful that she pushed him to go reach for the things that made him happy. In his little love life endeavors. No matter how badly it ended for the two of them—like getting scolded for coming home late or getting accompanied by the neighbor who owned Miiko, the cat, back home.
So why now? He didn't quite understand why it had to be now that it felt so wrong to see her pushing him towards someone else again.
She used to do it all the time, and it never bothered him.
Karasu briefly asked himself if the reason behind it was because they spent three—going four—years having no one else but each other. No, that couldn't have been it. Hiori was there sometimes, and Karasu was sure it never felt like this unpleasant feeling.
This was [Name] for crying out loud! The elementary kid who offered a half-eaten popsicle to him like it was some treasure. [Name] whom he pushed into the mud pond and laughed as she tried to get the dirt off her face. [Name] who could kick him so hard that he would fight to hold back his tears—even now that they were in high school.
[Name] was his best friend...
"I'll help ya get with 'er!" she grins, planting her hands on her hips in that little mannerism of hers that Karasu bets she doesn't even know she does, as though she was about to give him some prophet-level guidance free of charge.
Karasu just stares at her, longer than he would have liked to admit. Has she always been this short? Or did he simply grow taller?
Had they always been like this?
Yeah, she was his best friend.
And there should be nothing more.
…Right?
---
And so, the first semester of their first year in high school was spent planning ways to get Karasu together with Marisa while [Name] pulled all the hair on her scalp trying to hide her ever growing affection for her violet-haired friend.
This also consisted of asking around the campus for Marisa with [Name] doing all the "cow's work" as Karasu had oh-so-gently put it, which merited him a much-deserved kick to his shin.
He had many excuses. One, he didn’t want to seem desperate (which he was). Two, he was too busy (which he is). And three, apparently, he didn’t want any rumors to start going around that he was still pining over his elementary school crush (which he very much was).
Even if [Name] told him not to be ashamed of it, Karasu still couldn't bring himself to do it...
Part of it, though, was because he didn’t miss the way the fire in [Name]’s eyes froze over whenever it was mentioned. He just decided that he didn't like that even if he didn't know the reason why. It bothered him. A lot.
If it were [Name] who asked around, it was different. There would be nothing to worry about since she was also a girl, and girls look for other girls all the time, didn't they? They even accompany each other to the restroom like a pair of FBI Agents.
And if Karasu were to lay his heart bare for everyone to see, the only girl he looked around for, flipped heaven and earth over, out of his own jurisdiction and nearly toppled over in despair when he couldn’t find—aside from his mom and his older sister—was [Name].
But he didn’t know how to tell that to her.
The two best friends (mainly [Name] doing all the hard work) discovered a couple of interesting information about Karasu’s person of affection:
Marisa was in the swim club, an extremely coincidentally convenient twist of fate since the pool was by far the nearest facility near the soccer field (the dojo the farthest having been located on the other side of the school).
She excelled in Japanese Literature and Chemistry.
She worked part-time at a local café on Saturdays around the afternoon, another heaven-sent opportunity since soccer practice ended right before noon.
And finally written at the bottom of the paper in all caps along with a few doodles of hearts.
4. MARISA LIKES MUSHROOMS!!! ❤❤🍄❤❤
"Is that enough, yer highness?" [Name] asks him sarcastically, rubbing the tiredness from her eyes as she had spent majority of her night stalking Marisa across all social media platforms.
She could pass as a CIA agent by now from all this digging.
She eyes the page ripped from her notebook that Karasu held in one hand as they sat face to face in the classroom—with their desks pushed together to accommodate their lunches.
Written on the slightly wrinkled paper, in messy scrawny handwriting were the fruits of her hard labor.
"I better get compensated for his, you rabies-infected crow." she mumbles, resting her head on the desk, closing her eyes from the tiredness.
"Wow, ya got all of this in one night?" Karasu scans the paper, they weren’t much but it was still far more than what he could’ve gathered on his own. His stare lingered a moment longer on the girl—noting the way her head stayed resting on the desk, exhaustion seeping through the crevices of her skin as he observes the way her entire frame wilted from exhaustion.  
[Name] hummed in confirmation, far too tired to give a worded reply. Now that the less than sufficient hours of sleep were getting to her, she feared that if she spoke another word to Karasu about Marisa, she would end up saying something she'd regret. So, it was best to just... stay silent.
It's getting easier to hear Karasu talk about Marisa. Bearable in the kindest word; numbing in the worst. Still, it didn't mean that she could deny that it hurt any less.
Learning to live through something was very different from accepting it, especially when it was the one you love loving someone else.
[Name] just hopes that she gets over this soon—because the last thing she wanted was to get in the way of Tabito's happiness. Or worse, lose him because of her own selfishness—because she couldn't get over a silly pathetic crush—that she couldn't stop wanting, praying… hoping to have him more than a friend.
"Oh, she likes mushrooms," she hears Karasu mumble, seemingly intrigued.
It was better to pretend that she didn't hear him. It's better this way, she tells herself. He wasn't going to remember anyway, but somehow, her traitorous mouth always worked faster than her brain, a step too late to grab the chance to hold her tongue before she says something she would regret... which is now.
"Ya can give her yer mushrooms now, Tabi-chan."
Silence blanketed the distance between them, seemingly setting them apart from the reverberating chaos ensuing in the classroom.
[Name] was embarrassed beyond belief, feeling her entire face catch fire yet was too exhausted to shield it away from him—not like he could see, but still!
Please let the ground swallow me whole.
Karasu looks to her like she suddenly grew three heads. "I'll always give ya my mushrooms, [Name].” He whispers softly, placing an elbow on the table, propping his face upright with his palm as he unconsciously smiled at the blush that littered the meadows of her face.
“Ya love 'em right? Just ‘bout the only other thing ya like other than Miiko." He snickers at his own jest, remembering a time in their childhood where [Name] would look over the fence and stare at the neighbor's cat for hours or chase it around the little alley way near Miiko's house.
She felt her heart skip a beat. [Name] blamed it on the weather, or perhaps a growing ailment that made her heartbeat irregular. This was practically Arrythmia—dangerous and a health risk!
But she was sure that heart diseases didn’t come with lingering affections for your best friend. It also didn’t come with the pain of knowing that he was never gonna like her back. And she was most certain that it wasn’t attached with happiness after knowing that he remembers…
[Name] didn't like that she felt happy that Karasu knew that little thing, even if everything about her had practically become baseline knowledge for the soccer player. She just didn't like it.
"Uhuh," she agrees mindlessly, her voice squished by gravity as she remained still laying her head on the desk facing the window and looking at the world vertically.
"When ya marry her, can't just go out in the middle of dinner ta hand me some mushrooms, right?" She teases, the rumble of her laughter feeling more like a hurtful jab to her already breaking heart.
"I guess..." Karasu no longer stared at the paper he held in his hand, opting to observe his very sleep deprived [Name].
Maybe the dryness of her eyes was getting to her or perhaps she was tired of him beating around the bush and walking on eggshells every time Marisa was around.
Karasu sighs, folding the paper three times and tucking away in the safety of his bag. The raging inferno in her soul dwindled to a small flame, her usual bladed tongue that cut through his ego had dulled, her silence all too prominent in a world where everyone had something to say.
Ah… I don’t like this.  
"Hey, gorilla woman." he grips her head like a ball, although he took a conscious effort not to hurt her—lest he risk his well-being be a training dummy for the karate practitioner.
[Name] tried to wave away his arm but right now, she was too tired to even lift her hand. She could only mumble a very annoyed, "Don't call me gorilla, you rat-nest haired crow."
"Let's go to a café this weekend." he suggests, taking a strand of her smooth hair and twirling it between his fingers like it was some sort of scientific breakthrough.
Was it weird that he was inviting her to go out all of a sudden?
But this was [Name]! They always went out together whether it's the local fair, watching a soccer match, those late-night convenience store runs... this was nothing special.
Karasu started to chant that phrase like a mantra in his head. He was catching himself doing that too much—trying to convince himself that it was nothing—that spending time with [Name] was like a norm already.
They've done it a thousand times and he reckons, a thousand more after this... so what's the difference?
His heart thudded against the confines of his ribs at the sight of her: tired beyond all rhyme and reason, brows furrowed from the noise buzzing in the small room filled with their classmates and other students, her empty bento box next to his own like yin and yang. Salt and pepper. It wasn’t complete without the other.
Has she always been this present in his life? Since when? When did she start to be so interwoven in everything he did that it became strange when she suddenly disappears even when she’s right there? Really… since when?
Since forever...
And maybe, just maybe, that was the difference.
An idiotic part of [Name] rejoiced at his invitation—
"We can see Marisa there while we're at it," he quickly adds without thought, afraid she might misunderstand.
—yet all too suddenly; cruelly, she is reminded that she shouldn't long to be more than just his friend.
"Sure thing, Tabi-chan..." she whispers softly, forcing the thorns in her throat to pin down the hurt so they wouldn’t tumble out—that he may never see them.
And there, with the afternoon gale flowing past the curtains, she feels her heart breaking a little bit more.
---
When the weekend rolled around, Karasu finished his soccer practice exactly before noon, leaving him with a few spare minutes to change into the extra clothes he brought with him. Initially, he felt like the unluckiest athlete in the world when he dragged his ass here at 5 in the morning yet now that he was preparing to spend the rest of his day earlier than what he originally planned, he began thinking that it wasn't so bad after all. At the very least, it gave him enough time to go and see [Name] look at him in envy that his practice ended earlier than her.
[Name], much to Karasu's expectations, did not look at him in jealousy as he had hoped. Instead, she was second-in-line for kicking practice, looking like all the forces of good and evil conspired together to make her day as terrible and energy-draining as much as it could.
The Karate coach, a middle-aged woman who was also their gym teacher, made everyone stay back to practice some drills, claiming she saw it on her social media feed last night and wanted everyone to try it out... and no one was going to leave until at least one of them got it. It was cruel—very much the kind of savagery she expected to get from this tyrant (coach) in her innate domain (karate)—not that she was any stranger to cruelty, though she would be lying if she claims she didn't feel just a little bit sad when she was at the receiving end of it.
Karasu was allowed to stay in the dojo and watch, so long as he remained a safe distance from any potential kicking pads that might come flying his way—a warning he engraved to his mind and soul after getting smack-dabbed in the face by one, and many, many close calls.
It wouldn't be the first time he'd watch [Name] practice; he'd been making the trip from the soccer field to the dojo ever since the beginning of first year that the coach relented and let him stay no matter how many times she told him to go away.
Karasu didn't mind the extra cardio, more often than not, [Name] was the one who had practice running so far from dismissal time, leaving him with nothing to do but sit and wait for her to finish so they could go home together. And it was rarely the other way around.
But seeing her here, in her element, always tugged at something in his chest. A sort of reminder that this was the girl he was lucky enough to call his best friend.
When it was [Name]'s turn to do the drill, everything faded to silence... until it was just her: bouncing on her feet under a thousand shimmering lights, drawing in a breath in preparation. And like the flow of the spring zephyrs, she sliced through the air like a fairy—an aggressive and very, very strong fairy—striking the lowest pad with her left foot, her right foot forcing the middle pad to fly, and finally—after so many failed attempts and an almost sprained ankle—successfully kicked the last top pad with her left foot.
She landed gracefully, like the first fall of snow, shattering the momentary reverie Karasu found himself raptured into.
What the hell?
[Name] looked to her coach in miserable anticipation, a silent plea to release her from this torture. It was between this room and this witch how many times she and her teammates had to do that godawful trick.
The coach gushed over the exhausted [Name], complimenting her for a few seconds before dismissing training.
[Name]'s tired vision zeroed in on Karasu, who was sitting cross-legged on the floor near the door, bag next to his side, and looking every bit the part of someone going on the most anticipated date of his life. [Name] blamed it on the light, or the fatigue seeping into the cracks of her heart, but for a small moment, a foreign light shone through the depths of sapphire pools of his irises.
She thought nothing of it, choosing to lazily wave at him from where she stood, completely oblivious to the lingering glimmer in his expression or the way his face shone brighter at her greeting as he waves back; that for the first time ever, the usually cocky soccer player found himself drowning in the oceans of shyness and hesitance at the sight of his best friend.
"Imma change real quick, so wait for me a little longer, 'kay?" she called, brushing past his figure as she sluggishly—bag in hand—made her way to the locker rooms.
Karasu nodded absentmindedly, his eyes tracing the shadows of her figure until she disappeared around the corner.
C’mon, me, this isn’t the time to feel all mushy for [Name]! That’s [Name]! Your best friend! The gorilla girl next door always working hard like a cow, he internally scolds himself.
Karasu let out a low groan, slumping over on the floor, staring at the place where [Name] once stood. He swore he could almost see her figure there, and he would have believed his own illusions if he didn't just see her walk past him to go change.
The soccer player runs a hand over his face in frustration. "Honestly, what's wrong with me..." he mumbles, covering his head with his arm like it can somehow magically put out the wildfire wreaking havoc on the meadows of his face, burning through his resolve like paper.
In the locker room, [Name] was facing a dilemma of her own.
"Hey, [Last Name]-chan, are you and Karasu-kun going out?" one of her teammate asks, a gentle curiosity for Karasu and her long-term friendship, but the words felt like collapsing stars in the once quiet place.
In horrified befuddlement, [Name] screamed an anguished—"Huh?!" like the words her teammate spoke had been a cursed enchantment that will linger through her bloodline for a thousand generations and not the fantasy she wanted to bleed into reality.
"That gel-faced crow who's scared of water? Hell no!" she denies, trying to have it look like the teases and jeers she usually passed around with others.
"But he always waits for you to finish practice" her teammate pointed out.
And it was true—Karasu always made the trip across campus just to wait for [Name] to conclude training no matter how long it dragged on. She recalls the many times the soccer player had fallen asleep by the door, using her gym bag as a pillow because, according to him, her clothes were fluffier and a lot more comfortable that the mess of dirty, sweat-drenched heap in his bag he called clothes.
And as told by another one of his anecdotes, [Name]'s stuff (and even herself) were lot more preferable sleeping buddies than a soccer ball. A soccer ball! Then there was also the day he carried her home after a particularly bad fall from kicking practice, even if Karasu himself was tired beyond belief.
"That mole rat's been around for so long, we prolly look the same in everyone's eyes by now." [Name] jokes as she continues to rummage through her bag, shaking her head from the horrible image of her having Karasu’s hair.
"And besides..." she murmurs, her gaze distant as she stares at the dress she chose—picking apart her closet all night, spending so long trying to carefully place it in her bag—only to betray herself by abandoning it last minute.
He already likes someone else.
---
The walk to the café was relatively silent.
Karasu kept the comments of [Name] being far too quiet for the past week to himself. He thought, maybe she was just tired. The school festival was coming up, but she also still had to train. It was cruel, especially the arduous training he saw her endure earlier that she looked ready to rearrange her coach’s face to roadkill.
Domed by an eternally blue sky, he glances at her from the corner of his eyes.
She looked like hell!
Karasu wasn’t about to lie and tell her that she looked great—that would just be cruel—so he chose not to say anything at all.
He didn’t trust himself with his words, a restraint he put on himself like heaven’s command after he caught himself looking around a store and thinking: Oh, [Name] would like this,or, She’d look good in this, before a hollowing echo of, She always looks good in everything though,would cause him to freeze where he stood and cover his face in shame for having such thoughts.
By far the worst case of this was when he stopped someone because he mistook her for [Name]—it was ridiculous! This was getting outrageous!
Yet one look at her, right here, when all the colors of the sun had painted her in an ethereal light, how could he still think that she was the most beautiful person on the planet?
It must be witchcraft. A curse put upon him for lying. A truth… that he was finding increasingly difficult to deny.
Absolutely… ridiculous…
"You tired?" he asks casually, even if the answer was staring at the road in the form of dark circles heavier than Oganesson.
"Nah.” She smiles through the haze, lazily eyeing him from the sides. “This is the usual ain't it?" she laughs, shifting the weight of her bag that she refused to let Karasu carry despite his many offers and demand for her to just give it to him.
"Don't act so tough, gorilla woman. If yer tired, we can always just go another day." He rubs the back of his neck, finding no other thing to do to ease this shaking sensation in his cardiac muscles.
"Stop callin’ me gorilla woman, you turd-face crow,” she barks, though her tone didn’t hold an ounce of real bite. “'Sides... we're already here. It'd be a shame to leave now."
They stood in front of a glass-front café, cakes and other deserts peering at the passersby from the window. The little signboard by the door offering a warm welcome.
The scent of something faintly sweet weaved with the aroma of coffee waltzed though the warm air of the shop, a low hum of conversation rippling the serene atmosphere.
It thankfully was not the busiest place on the planet. There were a couple of middle school kids by the window side laughing amongst themselves, an office worker staring blankly into the horizon as the sunlight caught her auburn hair in a shimmering light, lastly, an elderly couple shared a pie and some loving smiles near the bar.
"Welcome!" A melodic voice cuts through the air, littered with all the scent of flowers in an open field, warm like the hearth of a fire.
Karasu turned at the direction of the voice, squinting at the sight of a girl in an apron holding a notepad. Who the hell was this loser? He thought, amused in the kindest light, domineering, in the worst.
The soccer player pushes [Name] to an empty booth, telling her to go order whatever her heart desires.
“Just get me whatever,” she mutters, closing her eyes looking every bit like the monks he occasionally sees on TV… only cuter—what the actual hell?
“Sorry to burst yer bubble but they aren’t sellin’ that here.” He teases, reaching over to pinch her cheeks to get her to wake.
“Ow! Quit that!” She yelps and swats his hand away, sticking her tongue out at him before grabbing the menu from the table. “I’m gonna make your pockets hurt, turd-face.”
She buries her head in the menu dedicating every bit of concentration on the booklet, and he let her—even if he knew how this was gonna end.
“The Chocolate Milk non-coffee drink! And some cake trio platter!” she smiles at him—like he hung the constellations in the sky, or that he had been the one who conjured all the colors of the sun—the first in a long while, so it seems.
“Ya always get that everywhere we go.” He sighs, tracing her features with a gentle gaze.
“Ya asked me what I wanted, and I want that—” she raises her voice in faux defiance as if daring him to contradict her.
“Yeah, yeah…” he waves her off, flicking her forehead to add to her ire. “’Scuse me,” he calls over the lady who welcomed them earlier.
[Name], lost in her own thoughts, allowed her gaze to linger on his side-profile from under her lashes. It wasn’t intentional. Why was he sitting there like that anyway all broad-shouldered and tall and—and…
She sighs in defeat.
When did you get so pretty? She thinks, mapping the edges of his jaw, memorizing the sudden sharpness in his gaze.
When did I get so sappy? She lets out a breath, shaking her head to clear her thoughts.
"Oh, Karasu-kun! Long time no see!"
The greeting caused [Name]’s eyes to shoot open, her stare landing on Karasu before it traced his gaze to the café worker smiling at them—at him, every atom the embodiment of a daydream. Built upon the foundation of effortless femininity.
“Uh…” Karasu trails off, unsure of what to reply. He was certain he didn’t know this person—
“You don’t remember me?” the waitress points to herself, “It’s Marisa, from elementary school.” She laughs, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ears.
Karasu didn’t speak for a moment, short enough to feel natural yet all the stretch to let [Name] know that he was struggling to think about what to say.
"Marisa… Oh, Marisa!” His voice raises higher than expected, like he was caught red-handed for something he was guilty about. “Didn't expect you to be working here." He says, his easy-going tune hiding the truth that they intentionally chose this place because she was working here—that it was not a fated coincidence but a conspired plan. That was what [Name] thought, after all, she was the one who brought him here.
But Karasu… Karasu had forgotten all about that.  
"[Last Name]-san, too. Hello," Marisa greets politely, every inch of her polished to a girly perfection. [Name] nods her head in acknowledgement, mumbling a quiet “Hi”.
"So, what can I get you two?" She asks smoothy, quickly pulling out a notepad.
Karasu steals a glance at [Name] finding her slumped where she was seated, painfully aware of the feel of her knee grazing his from under the table.
"I'll get the bamboo shoot soup if ya will." He replies cooly, like it was the most natural thing in the world, and it probably was.
What wasn’t natural, however, was that…
"Ever the favorite, huh?" Marisa teased, writing down his choice. "Ours have some mushrooms in it, so do be careful."
…She remembered.
"No biggie, [Name] here loves those." Karasu tilts his head to her direction. Did he have all the intention to rub it in her face that he was so close to getting the girl of his dreams? Or did the world mocked her through him as if saying, in big bold letters: Stop dreaming already, girl, yer never gonna get ‘im. Totally not cool.
[Name] didn’t know how to reply, she had no intention of doing so in the first place since she wasn’t even supposed to be part of this conversation to begin with.
"Really? I love mushrooms too, [Last Name]-san." Marisa beams, smiling like an angel.
"Well ain't that a surprise!" Karasu laughs.
No... it really wasn't.
He was enjoying this too much, [Name] thinks. How cruel does fate have to be that [Name] was hearing this conversation right in front of her face? Pretty damn cruel. She was no stranger to that, her coach made sure of it, fate made it certain, and the world set it in stone so that she may never forget.
Yet it still hurt. It hurts… so much. Every time she’s led back to this road, back to this desolate, empty, and pot-hole-riddled road—her resolve… breaks just a little bit more.
But she took one look at him, at Karasu—her best friend in the whole wide universe—looking so happy, and she plunged to freezing depths of her acceptance.
She steeled her heart, tightened the seams that they bled through the threads. Just a little longer, she whispers. Please, just for a little longer. Karasu's happy. Finally, after three long years of waiting for this chance, it's already within his grasp.
That's right.
This is how it should be.
This would be the inevitable outcome of all this planning and running around. All so he can be with her.
These useless feelings need to go away, they need to leave because they would just get in the way. They'll wedge themselves between Karasu and his happiness. [Name]’s yearning to be more than just a friend in his eyes would drive him away. Karasu didn't think of her like that. He didn't like her that way. And he would never. And she needs to learn how to accept that.
Because why would he—how could he—if Marisa was the one in front of him? How could he bring himself to love [Name] when the girl of his dreams liked him, too?
I'd rather see them happy together. So happy that it'll show just how ridiculous it is for me to want him. Until I can't even dream of it anymore.
Because that was how it should be.
This was the reality.
[Name] loves Karasu that much was true.
But... Karasu loved Marisa… and no power on earth was going to change that.
---
"Isn't this strange," Tsubame, Karasu's older sister, mused, looking up from her schoolwork all the way from the dining room table to stare at her little brother's entrance like he was some strange lab experiment gone wrong.
"What's strange?" Tabito questions, yanking his shoe off with all his usual carelessness before haphazardly shoving them in the cabinet by the door.
"Yer not with [Name]-chan."
Tsubame now stood before him, an inch taller than him, courtesy of the higher leveling of their living room from their entry way.
"Didja get in a fight with her or somethin'?" She buzzed around the taller male like a bee, completely forgetting about her work still littered on the table. "Finally win? Yer count is on an outstanding three to fourty seven, those three wins because you cheated!"
Karasu dodged his sister's nosiness, grabbing a glass from the cupboard to fill it with his usual kelp tea.
"We didn't fight," he mumbles, from his spot, he could see past the window above the kitchen sink and to the window of [Name]'s living room. "She was just tired 's all." He answers mindlessly, rinsing off his glass before turning to leave, brushing past his older sister and her simmering curiosity.
Tabito didn't understand it himself.
That was supposed to feel like mission accomplished! He should've been over the moon, even reaching farther than the center of the galaxy... but he wasn't.
He blamed it on the mushroom he was forced to eat! He blamed it on the karate team's coach. He blamed it on destiny, on fate, on any other higher being messing with him and laughing in the coves of their habitats!
Most of all... he blamed himself.
Whose fault was it other than his that all [Name]’s hard work got burnt to the ground?
Because when he talked to Marisa for the first time in three years—just when he thought it would be a lasting moment that would echo for all eternities to come—he felt absolutely nothing. Like that day back in elementary graduation. Completely impassive from that girl's confession.
Empty.
He didn’t even recognize Marisa! He called her a loser! And despite having her right next to him, within arms’ reach, close enough to hold, all the bit possible to touch… all he could think about was the girl sitting in front of him.
How her eyes looked too tired, that she probably wanted nothing more than to sleep, or get that tournament trophy over and done with and goof around.
Everything about Marisa blended with all the colors of the earth, nothing but a backdrop to make everything else shine. Her voice fading to a dull echo until all he could hear was the silence…
"Ya can't keep denying, Tabi-chan."
...Silence left by the lack of [Name]'s presence.
It must be witchcraft; someone must've cast a spell on him on the way home! That must be it! Because why on earth was he hearing [Name]'s voice in the safety of his home when he very much clearly saw her walk through her front door and shut the door on his face?
He blamed it for forgetting to clean his ears earlier, because the next words he heard came in the form of his sister's voice. "If there's somethin’ ya wanna say to her then ya better say it."
It was tsubame-nee-chan from the very beginning.
It was just Tabito thinking otherwise. It was him summoning all these hallucinations of [Name]. Conjuring the image of her in the afternoon haze, seeing her face in the breaks of dawn, hearing her voice in the horizons of twilight. It was all him. All him.
"It'll make ya feel better if yer just honest with yerself. Do it now while ya still have the time." Tsubame places a comforting hand on her little—who is now not so little—brother's shoulder. "Regret always comes when the moment's over."
"Does this come from yer personal experience?" Tabito shot back, evading what he already feels engraving in his heart.
"Imma let that slide, you ungrateful brat," Tsubame smiles through her irritation, before it quickly thaws to a sigh, "It's an old saying, Tabito. 'Repentance comes too late' or 'the biggest fish is always the one that got away'." She shakes her head, tired of her brother being an idiot!
"While she's still there, just tell her how you really feel."
"What's that s'posed to mean?" he barks, aggravated by the hidden implication, he didn't like that—
"Oh, please! Assess yerself for once!" Tsubame yells, throwing her hands fed up with this idiot’s stubbornness, turning her back and retreating to the dining table to continue her work. “Ya shouldn’t need someone to spell it out fer ya! Figure it out like man, ya idiot!”
His sister’s words strike true, rattling the peace within his great fortress of denial. The weight of it left him standing there in the ruins of his cowardness, unsure if he should rebuild the remnants of something he once had thought would stand for eternity.
Tabito needed to know that for himself, he knew that. He also knew that he shouldn't need an external force to have him work on his tangled feelings of friendship and love, because it would make it meaningless. He needed to find that out on his own.
He needed to do all that gruelling powder and brush work on his own accord and find out for himself where exactly did he cross the line between friends and 'I guess spending life with you wouldn't be so bad'.
[Name] was always there.
Everywhere he looked, in every memory he held, she existed. No matter what point in his life he travels back to—she was just... there.
All the memories he could recall had remnants of her: a smile, her daunting laugh, the pain of her kicks, the scent of daylight that lingers around wherever she goes. She was there. In everything. Everywhere. In all the colors of the sun.
The heat from soccer practice. The gentle gale of spring. The moon in all its glory. She was there. The laughter echoing in the streets. A shadow in the playground. The starting thought before daybreak. A lingering memory before he succumbs to slumber. She was there.
In all his thoughts, every action, every smile, every laugh... they all led back to her. The fall of snow, the rain of petals, the crashing waves, the eternal saturated autumn sky.
There's a piece of her in everything.
When did it all change?
When did I start seeing you like this? When did I go so far beyond the boundary that I couldn't see that everything was blurring past all the colors of friends? When did I start missing the sound of your voice? When did I start staying in the illusion that I didn't see you more than a friend?
When did I...
This was the reality.
An undeniable truth he had always run away from. Choosing to cower behind the fragments of a past he had long swept out of his heart.
He was in love with her.
Karasu Tabito... was in love with [Name].
And he has been for a long time.
---
When Monday morning came in, Karasu showed up on her doorstep with his uniform thrown on his figure looking like a whirlwind passed him by on his way to her house.
He gave her his usual smirk, trying to bite at her ego from the way he stares at her. Condescending from an outsider’s words; lovesick from his.  
“Didja run twenty before comin’ here on somthin’?” She teased, fixing his crooked tie with a laugh.
Karasu stares at her face scrunched into concentration, his head buzzing from the drumming of his heart—reaching all the way to the tip of his fingers. He prayed to all the deities out there that she couldn’t hear the way his chest wanted to split open from the lingering warmth of her touch. Or that she couldn’t feel that his body was emitting more heat from her close proximity.
Did he do this on purpose? No.
But for once he thanked all the cells in his body for working late on a Monday morning because he gets to be at the receiving end of [Name]’s warm touches.
“Tabi-chan? Are ya listenin’?”
Karasu’s momentary reverie crumbled at the sound of her voice. [Name] eyes him with heavy concertation, tilting her head as she looks up at him, her hand no now holding to the strap of her bag.
“Sorry, what were you sayin’?” he whispers, his breath falling short and had his words tumbling like the wind, left for only his and the earth to hear.
[Name] paid no mind to his strange demeanor, shifting her weight from one foot to another and looked at anything but his searching gaze.
“I said I was sorry,” she purses her lips together, the words didn’t taste particularly unpleasant, but the reminder of their laughter still haunted her more than she’d like to admit. “Fer cuttin’ yer date short with ‘er, I mean.” She clarifies, shutting the door behind her as she steps a foot onto the front lawn, walking past Karasu who stood on her porch a moment longer than usual.
Karasu quickly pulled himself together and closed the distance she put between them in a few large strides, slyly taking her bag with her as he distracted her with conversation.
"'S nothin'. We had a talk while ye were dyin' in the bathroom," he muses, poking at her side to rile her up.
"Hey! I wasn't dyin'—" [Name] rose to protest, because she really wasn’t. She excused herself to the bathroom to spit out whatever the hell it was that she ate—"Their bread had raisins on them. Raisins. I hate raisins." She argues defensively, crossing her arms over her chest… entirely unaware that her bag was no longer in her hold.
"Could've given them to me," Karasu shrugs, leaning half his weight on her, a terrible habit he developed when they were nine years old and hasn’t grown out of ever since.
[Name] dragged her weight to her legs, trying to keep both him and her upright. She doesn’t wanna topple over the sidewalk... again. It’s happened too many times already, and with more than at least ten of their neighbors seeing.
"Not in front of yer Mona Lisa," [Name] sneers, pushing his ever-drawing face away.
"Puhlease, she's hardly a Mona Lisa." Karasu comments, voice mumbled by the nice-smelling hand that belonged to the girl next to him.
[Name] was not sure how to respond to that. The truth was that they left the café after they finished eating. But some might think, oh, isn’t that what you do though? Well, it was what she wanted to do. She planned that meet-up to end with Karasu and Marisa living happily ever after. But as she went to the bathroom, came back, and told Karasu that she had to go home because she wasn’t feeling well—he offered to walk her home. It was what a good friend does, really it was. But you don’t do that when the girl you like is standing right next to you!
Plus, they talked about that! [Name] told him that she was gonna make up some dumb excuse to get them alone. This was the dumb excuse! But he was being more of an idiot than the idiotic excuse leaving her lips.
In the end, they ended up bidding her farewell… with Karasu lying through his teeth that he was gonna come back—not that [Name] knew that considering she was far too busy glaring at him from the side.
"Marisa... has a boyfriend already,"
Karasu’s voice froze the gaping silence between them, his words flying into the blue skies, forever left to find their way to the land of acceptance Karasu has long since passed.
[Name] looked to him in shock, stumbling over her step before regaining her footing only to gawk at him again.
Is that true? Did Marisa really have a boyfriend? Since when? I never saw that on her socials. Did Karasu confess or something? Or was Marisa possessed by some sort of psychedelic mind reader?
[Name] would never know… and she reckons Karasu was never gonna talk about it either. She knows that look, when his eyes stare so far into the distance she begins to wonder if he was seeing a portal to another universe open before his eyes, let’s not talk about it.
"Oh... uhmm,” she starts; racking her brain for an appropriate response that wasn’t Hell yes! or Woo hoo! because that was not appropriate in the least. “That's rough buddy." She awkwardly pats his back, only this time, she had no melted, half-eaten popsicle to offer him. Only a heart, battered and bruised, covered in bandages and held together by a thread… that will only ever be his.
"Ya know, I thought I’d be more upset about it." Karasu looks to the heavens, oddly vocal of what he felt.
Maybe it was morning dew refracted by the early morning rays. Maybe it was autumn gale, ruffling the threads of his clothes. Maybe it was because of her—of [Name].
She looks at him with a raised brow, "And ya aren't?"
He smiles at her, one so gentle it could rival the clouds, replace the sun in warmth… dethrone Aphrodite from her position. “No,” he whispers, “No I’m not.”
He takes it all in, the image of her in this light. Karasu traces the contours of her face, the dust of roses powdered on the hills of her cheeks, the shine of a thousand galaxies in the pools of her irises.
Karasu was never one to believe in magic, or the supernatural… he couldn’t even consider himself an avid fan of the faerie folk.
But if somehow, somewhere—in this vast infiniteness, in the depths of the parallels, and the lullabies of the unknown—if there existed a figure for love, he was sure that it would be her.
"Maybe it's cuz I never liked her enough to begin with."
His confession slipped past his lips in a low murmur, faint enough that it could pass as a song of the fall, but she heard it. Always. Because what else could explain the reason that [Name] had suddenly started choking on her spit.
"Oi! Ya alright? Hey! [Name]! Don't die!" Karasu panics.
"Whaddaya mean ya don't like her?!” She screams, shoulders heaving from the sudden strain on her lungs. “What's all that work for then? Didya lie to me? Karasu Tabito—"
Her tone sent shivers crawling through his spine. "Woah,” he raises his arms in surrender. “Don't go drawin' the full name card on me [Name]." he tries to laugh it off, but the look in her unimpressed eyes told him that he needed to say something else.
"I did get somethin' out of yer hard work," he smiles.
"Which is?" [Name] nods in anticipation, leaning closer.
"Realizin' I don't like her anymore."
[Name] draws a deep breath, releasing it in an exaggerated huff of air, and without another word, continued to walk to school.
This was hopeless.
She walked in front of him. One, because she didn’t want to look at his face at the moment. And two, so that he won’t be a witness to her burning cheeks and her desperately suppressed smile. Yeah, no way in hell was she letting him see that!
"Told ya about it remember?" he calls from behind, a good four to five steps apart.
"I can barely remember what I ate yesterday, ya gotta be more specific."
Karasu stares at the back of her head, a view he’d seen for at least half his life already. "That day… by the seaside."
[Name] remained wordless; she remembers that vividly. Because how could she ever bring herself to forget.
The day that she…
"Ya have the memory of a goldfish," Karasu groans, every bit the telenovela star he was. "I told ya, getting’ love ain't everythin' in this world."
…began to like this guy.
"Oh." She whispers.
"Remember now?"
That memory had always been something she treasured, never an ephemeral wandering like a half-buried shell washed ashore.
[Name] looks to him from over her shoulder as she nods in confirmation. "What's that gotta do with this though?" She continues ever forward, eyes once more trailing to focus on the pavement before her.
Karasu’s answer got stuck in the tunnels of his throat, like his own brain was unsure of the reason why he brought it up in the first place. He just wanted to talk to her, to hear her voice echo for all eternity in the caves of his soul, even long after he’s left this world. "Losin' an ordinary girl ain't worth it to be upset over."
[Name]’s footsteps falters, the edge of her shoe getting caught by a crack appearing out of nowhere, much like her own traitorous heart, once again caught in the snares of his words. The words someone spoke to her long ago echoing in her head, you two are finally reaching the age of maturity. Finally—after so, so long—brave enough to let do of the things that weren’t meant to stay, and to be strong enough to accept those who were supposed to.
"Woah," this time, [Name] turned to face him with a skin-crawling grin, an all too familiar shape, he thinks.
"Who ever knew a day would come when Karasu Tabito calls his lifelong love an ordinary girl—"
"She wasn't a lifelong love!"
---
It took a long time for Karasu to gather the dust and form the courage to profess his love for [Name].
He was cocky, and overconfident, and rough and ragged around the edges, and disliked it when anything went wrong. Basically, he was his own enemy when it came to his own love life. Sure, people liked him enough to give him Valentine’s Day chocolates, but the issue lies in him, not his admirers. For the life of him, he could not be nice to anyone he saw as mundane or boring. He was an—in the nicest way possible—Karasu Tabito was an asshole. His smirk didn’t help his case one bit.
Oh, but how humbling an experience it is for him when she was the one standing before him. The great, I’m-gonna-make-you-see-yer-ordinary Karasu Tabito who stared down his opponents on field, was afraid to tell his best friend that he liked her.
That’s why he had dragged his feelings by the collar all the way to their second year of high school. His sister had more than a few not so nice things to say about him when she hears that up until now, he was still shaking in his elementary-school-boy shorts.
But could they blame him? Yeah, they really could. Even his parents looked at him weird when he always offered to wash the dishes at night because it gave him the excuse to see [Name] from the comfort of her living room.
Still, here he was—beating around the bush with the girl he likes.
But could they really blame him? This was [Name]! The one who could brawl in a gang fight barehanded and win. [Name] who had the nicest laugh and the warmest touch. It was [Name] whom he liked… [Name] who was dyed in all the colors of the sun.
And he was scared to lose her.
Karasu didn’t want to mess this up because not only will he lose her as a lover, he’d also be left to live in a word where he was no longer her best friend.
What if he did confess and she turns him down?
What then?
In his eyes, compared to her—[Name] who was everything in his world—to [Name] who had the nicest smile, and the happiest laugh, Karasu felt mundane in all the aspects of his life.
So sometimes, when his own emotions overwhelm him as he gets so lost just thinking about her in the silence of the night, he tells himself that maybe, it was fine like this.
Tabito and [Name]; [Name] and tabito. Best friends.
Maybe, he should just shut them in, keep it all inside and wait for it to go away, pray for it to go away. He was having loads of fun already. They were together all the time. Maybe... just maybe... it's fine like this. Maybe staying as childhood friends—as best friends forever—isn't so bad.
"Why're ya dressed like an old man?" [Name] raised a brow at him, lips twitching as she fought tooth and nail to swallow her laugh. Her eyes analyze his get up from head to toe, taking in his fake white beard down to his green yukata and his grey haori, and the geta on his feet that echoed with every exaggerated step; wooden footwear she saw inside her grandpa's shoe cabinet. He was hunched over like a shrimp, with a cane to support his weight.
"'S for the class!" he replies with enthusiasm, stroking his fake white beard like some wise old monk.
"Ya look like a senile old man." [Name] snorts, her restraint shattering at the angry look on his face as her laugh resonates in the crowded hallway. She adjusts her grip on the box of props, shoulders shaking from the little giggles that seeped from her lips.
Karasu cracked an eye open to glare at her, and with an added pizzazz, rose in hand to counter—more like agree—with her. "I am a senile old man!"
[Name] laughed harder, the box rattling like the happiness that rippled the once serene calmness of her soul. "Ya sound just like gramps!" She breathes, wiping her eye on the cloth of her shoulder.
Karasu grumbles in defeat, knowing he couldn't win against [Name] and her oh-so-creative teasing.
He dropped the act and adjusted his posture to stand to his full height, ultimately noting that [Name] had stopped laughing once she realizes that in height, Karasu would always have the last laugh. Or in this case, a triumphant smirk on his face as he eyes her from above, not even craning his head.
She squints her eyes at him. “Damn evolution,” she mutters under her breath and made sure her voice was loud and clear as she finishes her sentence with— “Since when did idiots grow to be so tall?!”
[Name] hmphed, turning her head to look away and sidestepped to get past himto move onward to her destination, but before she could, Karasu shifted to block her path.
"What is it now—" The words got lodged in the tunnels of her throat as the weight of the box she’s been carrying since the school gate suddenly disappeared from her arms.
She looked at him, startled to find him looking at anywhere but her. The autumn daylight made the crimson on his cheeks all the more prominent.
Karasu couldn’t bring himself to believe that he could ever be happy with being just her friend. He reckons he never will. It would kill him not to love her beyond all this. If there ever existed a universe where he was contented with that—he was damn sure it would not be this one.
Because he as much as he was cocky, and overconfident, and an asshole. Karasu was greedy. And he was selfish. And painfully stubborn.
"Just helpin' the pretty girl lift the heavy boxes."
[Name]’s face erupted into a thousand shades of red, but this time, she had nothing to use to hide it from him. He caught her by surprise. A dirty trick. Ambushed her to this—this… vulnerable position. She could feel like fire spread through her veins like lava, setting all in its wake into a melting heat, burning at the thorns of her restraint, drowning the caves of her hesitance to a resounding calm, and lighting the heavens of her soul into all the colors of the sun.
She hated this. Stupid Tabito. Before she could contain herself, her embarrassment took reign of her actions, her knee jerks up, landing a solid kick to the back of his thighs.
"Ow!" He yelps, did Karasu ever mention that her kicks were heavy? Well they were. The force of her assault had him fumbling over his own steps, but he could not stop the growing smile on his face.
"Get goin' old man!" she snaps, crossing her arms and glaring at all the things around them. She was flustered. Her body couldn’t decide if she liked it or hated it. Why does he find the need to say that? Why does Karasu have to be so—so… embarrassing?
[Name] buries her face in the palm of her hands, as if her own flaming limb could help cool the raging inferno on her face. Her mind replays his words like a broken record. Pretty girl. What the hell was that supposed to mean? Did he even mean that? Probably. That stupid crow always pushed her so far, teased her to no end. So, what was the difference this time?
Karasu laughs, a sound so cool and warm, the sting from his best friend’s kick fading to a dull echo. His gaze made from the softest threads, one so intertwined with the melody of affection, blanketed with the warmest colors.
…Maybe it’s because this time around, he actually means it.
And this time, he wasn’t afraid to say it to her.
This one will probably come around to bite him back, but he would take it. Anything the world throws at him—he would take it. Because he wouldn’t allow himself to see another sun if [Name] didn’t go to sleep not knowing that she’s pretty.
---
The day of the school's culture festival rolled around.
For the past three weeks, their class united on the single idea of setting up a little café. By some miracle, they actually pulled it off quite well, despite battling the initial deadline, heavily handicapped at the loss of their two athletes. Between Karasu’s rigorous training schedule and [Name]’s tyrant of a coach monopolizing every spare second of her time for practice, there was no way they were ever going to contribute much beyond the bare minimum.
But [Name] did not want to be dead weight.
She volunteered to carry the boxes containing the ingredients and decorations, carrying them across campus like a one-woman moving company. While Karasu was left with no other option but to dress up like an old man inviting people to come and buy—he would probably garner more attention if he stayed just the way he is, but with his sharp tongue and domineering stare, he would just scare all their customers away (not like a beard and a yukata could hold his words back).
By the time the sun had reached the middle of the sky, they already looked like they wanted to go home—both completely floored from the physical work.
[Name] sat crisscross apple sauce outside the classroom, her back against the wall, and Karasu plopped down beside her, stretching his legs out with a groan—no respect for anyone walking by, his legs were nearly occupying a quarter of the hallway!
Their lunches were as mismatched as their personalities: [Name] poked at the pasta littered with raisins while Karasu grimaced at the sight of mushrooms contaminating his bento.
He knew he should be thankful to his sister who had oh-so-kindly offered to make them lunch seeing as she was on break from college, but Tabito has already told her like a million times! He doesn’t like mushrooms, [Name] does. And [Name] didn’t like raisins, he did!
Without a word, he begins plucking the raisins out of her food like they were newly ripe fruits ready to sell, dumping them on the lid of his bento. In honor of distributive justice, he traded in all the mushrooms he had on his lunch to hers.
"Yer actin' weird," she mutters through a mouthful of pasta, eyeing him from where she sat.
"Whatcha talkin' 'bout, I've always been this kind." He retorts, smiling to convey his sincerity as he places a hand over his heart like it could vouch for his claims.
"Kind-a suspicious ya mean!" [Name] squints at him, pointing a stick of bread at his face. "Just say whatcha wanna say already!"
"Yer ovethinkin' it! i'm always like this!" he defended, not bothering to hide the way he eyes [Name]’s stick of bread.
If he were to just…
"Hey, Tabi-chan...” her call drew the curtains close to his evil scheme. “What would you do if I got a boyfriend?"
Her question silenced the chaos in his head, pulling apart at all the worlds he built until everything came to a standstill. Until he was surrounded by the never-ending nothingness that came with the weight of her question. Heavier than all the stars, so it seems. Why was she saying this? Why now? Why does it have to be now? Now that he was finally—
But she didn’t wait for an answer. Maybe he was perturbed by his silence, mistaking it for agreement. Yet the truth was that she just caught him off guard.
Like [Name]… he didn’t hold all the answers in the world.
"I probably wouldn't, huh?" she laughs, smiling despite the obvious squeeze in her throat. A jest, in the kindest words; hurt, in the worst. "No one's ever gonna want a brute like me."
That's not true, Karasu wanted to protest. What she spoke of couldn't have been farther from the truth.
He didn’t want her to think like that—she just couldn’t. She was someone who deserved the love she wanted to have… more than anyone else. And he wanted to say that to her. He wanted to tell her desperately that there was someone who loved her—hell, so many people loved her.
Every day, he raced against so many people for her affection, for a chance to feel what it’s like to be loved by someone like her.
"There's gotta be someone out there, right?" he offers. Or right here... if you can only look at me. "Someone who'll love you… just fer who ya are."
"Ya really believe in that?" she asked, laughing again, but this time it sounded more like an escape. She wraps the furoshiki on the bento box, her hands moving far too quickly that Karasu knew she was doing it just so she wouldn’t have to look at him.
But that didn’t matter. She could turn a blind eye to him today. He would wait. Ignore his attempts tomorrow—he would still wait. Stay oblivious to it for the next five years? Then he’ll just have to step up his game.
"I know it."
There was something about the way he said it, shacked by all the chains of his beliefs, as thought there could exists no surer thing that what he knew right at this very moment.
It took her by surprise, stole all the breath reserved in her lungs that she forgot that she needed to breathe to see the next day.
“Ya don’t even need to wish fer that,” he adds, voice steadied by the foundation of his own experiences. “They come naturally,” he continues.
In all the forms you can think of. A piece of paper with the things about yer crush. A soccer ball. The kicking pad almost takin’ yer head off. Or a melting, half-eaten popsicle on a summer day.
“Sometimes… ya never realize ya had them all along.”
[Name] formed her courage from the dust, turning to look at him, despite every pull of gravity telling her not to.
He was never gonna make forgetting him easy, was he? Perhaps he never wanted her to forget. Because how could she when Karasu says all these things that made her heart want to run out of her own chest? When he says all these that it leads her back to her planet-sized crush on him. How was she supposed to get away from him now? How was she supposed to move on? How was she going to ever fully deny that she didn't like him anymore when everything, in everywhere... all the roads lead straight back to him?
“And ya don’t need to wish for him to love you…”
Karasu smiles at her, one so different from all the others he ever gave her. Dyed in all the colors of gratitude, blessed by the heavens, shaded in all the colors of the sun.
“Because he already does.”
---
"Why'd we hafta go, Tabi-chan?" [Name] whines, tired from all the walking they had been doing for the last thirty minutes, now tired from all the hiking—seriously, who hikes in the evening?
"Whaddaya mean why?” Karasu shot back, raising a questioning brow at her complain. “We always go every year! And don't act like ya don't like it when yer all dressed up." he points to her yukata, dyed in the shade of violets, decorated with the flowing river in the form of cranes. Karasu had to leash his head and make a conscious effort not to look too much lest he risk getting reported for being a creep.
"Only cuz Ma made me,” she admits, tugging slightly at her obi. “Always naggin' 'bout actin' like a girl and lookin' like a girl as if I ain't a girl." She huffs, the corners of her lips weaving to a scowl.
Karasu tilted his head in fond gentleness. “You look beautiful,” he whispers, the sentiment flowing past his lips like the gentle spring breeze. “Yer always beautiful.”
His words crashed against her like a tidal wave: caressing the soles of her feet, drawing back, before coming at her all at once—with little to no warning at all.
[Name] tilts her head to the side to look at him, smiling at him with all the happiness in the universe. “Ya don't look to shabby yerself, Tabito."
Before he could fire back, Karasu caught a glimpse of sparks tracing the obsidian sky, rising to reach the heavens for it to fracture into a thousand colorful fire, dyeing the obsidian canvas with all the colors of man.
Yet he already saw something far more grandeur than those when he looked into the pools of her eyes—reflecting all the stardust and galaxies, as if everything existed just so they could dim when compared to her, like it all came to being, just so they could fall short when she breathes.
"They're so pretty..." she whispers in awe, smiling at the sight of the transient lights.
"Yeah," he hums mindlessly, but his eyes never left hers. You are beautiful.
"I like you, [Name]." Karasu’s words silenced the chaos of the world, as if everything spiralled into nothingness to create a space only the two of them shared.
[Name] stares at him in bewilderment, her lips parted slightly, not knowing what to say.
"Don't look so surprised,” Karasu berates her with a crooked grin. “Whatcha expect? I'm only human, ya know. Ain't immune to yer charms."
"Tabito what the hell—"
Her vision burst forth into multitudes of colors at the sight of him, red-faced, flustered beyond her wildest imagination, eyes that shone with all the bravery and strength in the world, still his voice is riddled with a careful gentleness—like if he spoke any louder, this ephemeral space would crumble and he’d find himself back to reality. But his words would resound in the depths and skies of her soul for all the eternities to come, until all the stars are nothing but a dream. Until the earth is painted with all the colors of the sun.
"I'm in love with you," he confesses, his hand reaching for hers. Shaking from his nerves, determined in his affection.
His eyes searched hers for traces of disdain, any hints that she didn’t want this. Karasu dug through the colors of her face for anything—anything that told him to go away, to never show his face to her ever again.
"And I have been for a long time."
His touch lingered, hesitant to take another step forward.
"I know I'm nothin' much.” He admits, pained at the thought of his own imperfections. “I get jealous easily, and I can't be nice to mediocre people. I can't swim, and I'm afraid of water. I'm prolly the last person ya'd ever want to love ya but..." he falters, his breaths coming in short intakes as he scavenged the lands of his soul for the right words to say—for the courage he had stacked upon one another.
“I don’t—” His voice cracks, holding her hand tightly as if her touch could piece back his crumbing confidence. “I want ya to be happy. God knows that I do. But I don't want to lose ya to anyone else.” But it seems like her warmth could not hold together his voice that shattered from the weight. “I’m selfish. And I’m greedy. If you still have space in yer heart for a little bit more of me, even if the odds are one to a million... then I'd want to have it.”
I'd risk everything to have it.
Karasu looked at her again, mapping the face of the one he loves, breathing heavily until he found the words he always wanted to say. "Yer beautiful. Yer smart, and strong. Anyone would be lucky to have ya love 'em."
He smiled weakly, voice softening to melt into the silence of the night.
"And... I'm just an ordinary guy, standin' in front of the most amazing girl... askin’ her to love him."
He could wait a thousand more years if she told him to. Capture every star in the sky if it makes her happy. Karasu would move the universe for her, and she will only ever need to ask.
He would color the world to her liking if she tells him too.
“Yer an idiot are’ntcha?”
Karasu raised his head to meet the sound of her voice. God, she was so beautiful.
“I guess I am,” he laughs.
“Good on ya that I like idiots.” She tightens her hold on his hand, smiling at him for all that he did and more.
Because people can’t love you exactly the way you want them to. You just have to let them try to do their best.
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I think I got sidetracked halfway tbh 💀this is my first time writing a non-tragedy paleontological distaster-ending fic also my first time writing for karasu because he wouldn't leave me alone 😭 I can't believe I managed to give birth to a fic in under four??? yeah four days. I think I began liking this guy like five days ago for some unknown reason ��� anyway, my requests are still open, and ya can read my other works here! thanks fer readin' 😁❤
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mcrdvcks · 1 day ago
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i love you, always and forever ࿐‧₊ my girl, my man
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chapter summary: You and Logan plan for your wedding.
word count: 9.9k+
pairing: Logan Howlett x fem!reader
notes: i could've dragged out them getting engaged (i couldn't help myself) and i could've dragged out them finally getting married (i just couldn't help it😭).
also, i meant to post this a few hours ago, but i had a dentist appointment and the roads here in texas are awful. so, if you live in california, stay safe! and if you are in texas, stay warm! xoxo
(you can imagine whatever ring you'd like, but i got bored one day and searched around for a vintage ring so here's what it looks like)
warnings/tags: reader wears glasses, fluff, summer break, wedding, honeymoon
series masterlist - chapter 1 → chapter 3
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“Do you think we’re missin’ something?” Jean wondered aloud.
Scott didn’t look up from his book, “about what?”
“About Y/N and—”
“Oh, yes. I thought I was the only one,” Ororo said, her tone carrying the faintest hint of amusement as she looked up from her book. She exchanged a knowing glance with Jean, who sat cross-legged on the couch across the room.
“Wait,” Jean said, closing the folder she’d been reviewing. “You’ve noticed it too?”
“Of course,” Ororo replied, leaning back in her chair with a small smirk. “It’s hard not to, the way Logan’s been acting.”
Scott finally looked up from his own book, his brow furrowed. “What are you two going on about?”
Jean rolled her eyes affectionately, setting the folder aside. “Come on, Scott. You must’ve noticed how Logan is with Y/N.”
“Not really,” Scott said with a shrug, earning an incredulous laugh from Jean.
“Men,” Ororo muttered under her breath, shaking her head. “He’s softer around her, more patient. Haven’t you seen the way he looks at her? It’s... different.”
Jean nodded, her expression thoughtful. “It’s not just that. It’s different than before. When me and Scott went to the store yesterday Logan asked for mango juice and yogurt-covered pretzels. Now who’s the only person we know who even likes those things?”
Ororo’s smirk grew. “Y/N.”
“Exactly,” Jean said, leaning forward. “I’m telling you, something’s shifted. They’ve always been close, but now? It’s like… there’s an extra layer to it.”
Ororo set her book aside, her tone teasing. “I’ve noticed other things too. She asked me for a bunch of yeast and some other ingredients last week—odd things for the lab. Then, two days later, she came by looking flustered, mumbling something about brewing beer. My guess? She’s making it for him.”
Jean grinned. “That sounds like her. She’s so shy about doing anything big, but she puts so much thought into the little things.”
Scott, still sitting with his arms crossed, frowned. “So, what? They’re dating. We all know that.”
“Yes, but this is different,” Jean insisted. “Logan’s been... softer, more relaxed. And Y/N? She’s been letting herself open up more. They’ve always had a connection, but this feels… more serious.”
Ororo nodded. “And the PDA. Don’t get me wrong, they’re not exactly hanging off each other in public, but it’s there. A little more than usual.”
Scott still didn’t look convinced. “I think you’re reading too much into this. Logan’s always been protective of her, and she’s been trying to come out of her shell. That doesn’t mean anything’s changed.”
Jean sighed, exchanging a look with Ororo. “You can be so dense sometimes, Scott.”
“Hey, I’m just saying! Logan’s Logan. He doesn’t strike me as the type to do anything halfway, but I’m not seeing what you two are apparently seeing.”
Ororo shrugged. “Give it time. You’ll notice eventually.”
---
Scott was heading down the main hall when he caught sight of Logan walking toward him. Logan had his usual brisk stride, but the large stack of magazines in his arms gave Scott pause.
“Logan,” Scott called, stepping into his path. “What’s with the reading material?”
Logan slowed to a stop, glancing down at the stack in his arms. Bridal magazines, at least half a dozen of them, with glossy covers featuring elaborate white dresses and floral arrangements.
He barely missed a beat. “For the fire,” Logan said gruffly, his tone so deadpan it took Scott a moment to respond.
“For the fire?” Scott echoed, his brow furrowing.
“Yeah. Fireplace needs kindling,” Logan replied, his expression unreadable as he shifted the magazines under one arm.
Before Scott could press further, Jean approached, her eyes widening slightly at the sight of the magazines. “Logan, is that…?”
“Magazines,” Logan cut in, his voice low. “For the fire. Don’t read into it.”
Jean’s lips twitched, barely holding back a smile. “Uh-huh.”
Logan let out a low grunt, clearly uninterested in continuing the conversation, and walked off without another word, leaving Jean and Scott standing in the hall.
Jean turned to Scott, her eyebrows raised. “Still think we’re imagining things?”
Scott glanced back at Logan’s retreating figure, the bridal magazines tucked under his arm. “…Okay, maybe something is going on.”
Jean smirked. “Told you.”
---
You rolled out from under the Blackbird with wire cutters laying on your stomach and an electric screwdriver in your hand. “Alright, fixed it. Still don’t know why you couldn’t ask Scott.”
Jean rolled her eyes, “I did. And he said ‘later’. It’s been 4 days.”
You gave her a small smile. “Figures.”
Sliding the wire cutters onto the small tool tray beside you, you sat up, brushing a stray lock of hair away from your face. Jean crouched down next to you, handing over a clean rag.
“Thanks,” you said, taking it to wipe the faint smudge of grease off your arms.
“Not bad for a physics professor,” Jean teased, her tone warm.
You shrugged, pulling off the gloves with a small tug. “I’ve picked up a few things here and there.”
Ororo, perched nearby with her arms crossed and a bemused expression, added, “If you weren’t so dedicated to teaching, I’d say you might have a future in mechanics.”
You laughed lightly, shaking your head. “I’ll leave the big repairs to Hank. I just know enough to get by.”
As you spoke, you folded the gloves neatly and set them on the tray. That’s when Jean’s eyes caught something—a glint of light on your left hand.
Her brow furrowed slightly as she tilted her head. “Y/N… is that—?”
You glanced at her, confused for a moment, before realizing what had caught her attention. Your engagement ring, a delicate band with an antique setting, was visible now that the gloves were off.
“Oh,” you said softly, instinctively touching the ring with your thumb. A shy smile tugged at your lips.
Jean’s eyes widened, a mix of surprise and delight flashing across her face. “Wait a second. When did this happen?”
Ororo stepped closer, her curiosity piqued. “What’s she talking about?”
Jean pointed at your hand. “Look at her ring finger.”
Ororo’s gaze followed, and her eyebrows lifted. “Well, well, well. I didn’t realize we had a bride-to-be among us.”
Your cheeks warmed under their scrutiny. “It’s… recent,” you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper.
Jean’s grin grew as she leaned in, her tone playful. “And by ‘recent,’ you mean…?”
“Two… maybe three weeks,” you said, trying not to squirm under her gaze.
Ororo let out a low whistle. “And you didn’t tell us?”
You looked between the two of them, your fingers fiddling with the ring. “We weren’t keeping it a secret. It just… hasn’t come up.”
Jean crossed her arms, clearly unconvinced. “Hasn’t come up? You’ve been engaged for weeks, and none of us noticed?”
You bit your lip, feeling a mix of nervousness and amusement. “Well… Logan and I aren’t exactly the ‘big announcement’ type.”
Ororo chuckled. “That, I believe. But still, congratulations are in order. It’s beautiful, Y/N.”
Jean nodded, her eyes softening as she looked at you. “It really is. And it suits you.”
“Thanks,” you murmured, glancing at the ring again. Despite the attention, there was a quiet happiness bubbling inside you.
Jean gave you a knowing look. “So… when were you planning on telling the rest of us? Or were we just supposed to figure it out on our own?”
“I wasn’t sure how to bring it up,” you admitted, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. “And Logan—well, you know how he is.”
Jean laughed. “Yeah, I can imagine his reaction to a big group toast.” She put on a gruff voice, imitating him. “‘No need to make a fuss.’”
You couldn’t help but laugh. “Exactly.”
Ororo smiled warmly, her teasing tone softening. “Well, fuss or no fuss, we’re happy for you. And you better let us know if there’s a wedding date.”
“Of course,” you promised, the warmth in their voices making you feel more at ease.
Jean reached over, giving your hand a quick squeeze. “Congratulations, Y/N. You two deserve this.”
“Thanks,” you said again, this time with more confidence.
Before the conversation could go any further, Logan’s voice carried down the hall. “Darlin’? You done with the jet?”
You turned toward the sound, seeing him leaning casually in the doorway. His usual gruff expression softened as his eyes met yours.
“Yeah, all set,” you called back, standing and brushing off your jeans.
Logan gave a small nod but didn’t move, his gaze lingering on you in that way that made your heart flutter.
Jean smirked, glancing at Ororo. “And there he is.”
“Don’t,” you muttered under your breath, feeling your cheeks flush again.
Ororo laughed softly, but neither she nor Jean said anything more. As you walked toward Logan, you caught the amused glances they exchanged, but you didn’t mind.
Logan met you halfway, his hand resting briefly on your lower back as you joined him. “Ready to head in?”
“Yeah,” you said, the warmth of his touch grounding you.
As the two of you walked away, you could still hear Jean and Ororo chuckling behind you, but Logan didn’t ask, and you didn’t offer an explanation. Some things were just better left between the two of you.
---
“Please?” you said, drawing the word out with an exaggerated pout as you held up the scissors, comb, and spray bottle. Your tone was teasing, but your eyes carried a hopeful glint.
Logan crossed his arms, his expression skeptical. “Darlin’, I’m tellin’ ya, it’s fine. It doesn’t need fixin’.”
You arched a brow, stepping closer. “Logan, it’s summer, and your hair’s gettin’ way too long in the back. I’m not saying you need a whole new look, just a trim.”
He gave a low grunt, clearly unconvinced, but there was a hint of amusement in his eyes. “I’ve been dealin’ with this hair longer than you’ve been alive. It’s manageable.”
“Sure it is,” you said, a small smirk tugging at your lips. “But wouldn’t it be more manageable if it wasn’t sticking out at weird angles?”
Logan sighed, running a hand through his hair. “You’re not gonna let this go, are you?”
“Not a chance,” you said sweetly.
He stared at you for a long moment before shaking his head. “Alright, fine. But on one condition.”
Your eyes lit up. “Name it.”
A slow, mischievous grin spread across his face. “We do it outside, and you sit on my lap while you’re at it.”
Your cheeks immediately warmed, and you stared at him, wide-eyed. “Logan,” you began, your voice dropping in embarrassment.
“What?” he said with a smirk. “You wanted this, didn’t ya? Gotta make it worth my while.”
You huffed, but your lips quirked up in a small smile despite your best efforts. “Fine,” you said, trying to sound exasperated. “But don’t blame me if you end up with a lopsided cut.”
Logan chuckled, his hand settling on your lower back as he guided you toward the back patio. The warm summer air greeted you as the two of you stepped outside. The mansion’s sprawling yard stretched out around you, the sun casting a golden glow over the lawn and the distant trees.
Logan grabbed one of the sturdy wooden chairs from the patio table and plopped down, spreading his legs slightly as he leaned back with a lazy grin. He patted his thigh. “Hop on.”
You hesitated for a moment, glancing around to make sure no one else was nearby. Though Logan wasn’t shy about showing affection, you were still getting used to moments like this. When the coast was clear, you let out a breath and moved to sit sideways on his lap. He shook his head, catching your waist and turning you so you straddled him instead.
“There,” he said, his voice low and pleased. “Much better.”
You rolled your eyes, but a smile tugged at your lips as you picked up the spray bottle and gave his hair a quick spritz. He leaned back, his hands resting casually on your hips while you combed through his damp locks.
“You know,” you said, keeping your tone light as you snipped at the ends, “this is kind of nice. Just us, the fresh air…”
Logan’s lips quirked. “Don’t get too used to it, darlin’. This is a one-time deal.”
“Sure it is,” you teased, snipping another section. “I’ll remind you of that next time your hair gets out of control.”
He gave a low chuckle, and you felt his thumb brush lightly against your side. It was such a small, unconscious gesture, but it sent a warm flutter through your chest. You leaned in a little closer, focusing on your task.
“Y/N!” Jean’s voice rang out from somewhere near the house, and your head whipped up in alarm. “Have you seen—oh.”
Jean rounded the corner, her steps slowing as she took in the sight of you perched on Logan’s lap, scissors in hand. Her lips twitched, clearly fighting a grin. “Am I interrupting something?”
You felt your cheeks flame, and you tried to slide off Logan’s lap, but his hands on your hips held you firmly in place. “Jean,” you said, your voice higher-pitched than usual. “I was just… cutting Logan’s hair.”
“Right,” Jean said, crossing her arms and giving you a knowing look. “Because clearly, that’s the only thing happening here.”
Logan, unbothered, smirked up at her. “You need somethin’, Red?”
Jean waved a hand dismissively. “Nope, nothing that can’t wait. Carry on.” She turned to leave but not before shooting you a wink over her shoulder. “Nice technique, Y/N.”
“Jean!” you called after her, but she was already walking away, laughing softly to herself.
You groaned, covering your face with one hand. Logan’s chest rumbled with laughter beneath you.
“Relax, darlin’. Let her have her fun.”
You peeked at him through your fingers, narrowing your eyes. “You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?”
“Maybe a little,” he admitted with a grin, his hands squeezing your waist gently. “But hey, you wanted to do this, remember?”
You sighed, but a reluctant smile tugged at your lips as you went back to trimming. “I’m never living this down, am I?”
“Not a chance,” Logan said, his voice warm and full of affection.
---
Logan reached his hand out haphazardly to close the bedroom door, the motion almost careless in his urgency. His other hand remained firmly planted on your lower back, guiding you with surprising gentleness as your lips stayed locked.
The click of the door shutting barely registered before he backed you into the wall, his movements smooth and deliberate. You gasped softly against his mouth, one of your hands sliding up to tangle in his hair while the other found its way to the back of his neck.
“Logan,” you murmured breathlessly, breaking the kiss for a moment, your lips brushing against his as you spoke.
“What?” His voice was low, a rough edge of amusement to it as his lips sought yours again. “You’re the one who started this, sweetheart.”
Your laughter bubbled up, light and almost involuntary. “I did not—”
“Oh, you absolutely did,” he teased, his hands settling more firmly on your hips. He nipped at your bottom lip before pulling back just enough to look at you, his grin mischievous. “You looked at me like that, darlin’. Don’t blame me for followin’ through.”
A flush spread across your cheeks, but you couldn’t stop the giggle that escaped you as he leaned in again, capturing your lips in another kiss. This one was slower, softer, but still filled with the same electric energy that seemed to hum between the two of you whenever you were close.
You tightened your arms around his shoulders, fingers pressing lightly into his skin. He grunted softly, the sound half amusement, half approval, before his hands slid down to the backs of your thighs.
“C’mere,” he muttered, his voice husky as he gripped you firmly and lifted you effortlessly. Your legs instinctively wrapped around his waist, and he pinned you against the wall more securely, his body pressed warm and solid against yours.
“Logan!” you squeaked, a mix of laughter and surprise in your tone. “You’re gonna drop me.”
He smirked, his lips brushing along your jaw before he kissed the corner of your mouth. “I’ve got you,” he said, his tone low but teasing. “When are you gonna figure that out, huh?”
You opened your mouth to reply, but before you could, the lights in the room flickered and then went out completely, plunging everything into sudden darkness.
You gasped softly, instinctively tightening your hold on Logan. “What just—?”
“Power’s out,” he muttered, his tone shifting to mild annoyance. He pulled back just enough for you to feel his breath against your skin. “Perfect timing.”
You couldn’t help the small laugh that escaped you, the absurdity of the situation cutting through the moment’s intensity. “Guess the mansion’s old wiring isn’t built for summer storms.”
“Guess not,” he grumbled, but there was a hint of amusement in his voice. “You okay?”
“Yeah,” you said softly, smiling despite yourself. “But we might want to move before someone walks in on this.”
He chuckled, his hands still steady beneath you as he adjusted his grip. “I don’t care who walks in. Let ‘em.”
“Logan,” you groaned, but you couldn’t hide the grin in your voice. “Don’t even joke about that.”
He leaned in, pressing a quick kiss to your lips before pulling back with a smirk. “Alright, alright. Let’s get you down.”
He set you on your feet gently, his hands lingering on your hips for a moment longer before stepping back. Even in the dim lighting, you could see the playful glint in his eyes.
“Maybe we finish this later,” he said, his voice low and warm.
You nodded, biting your lip to suppress another smile. “Maybe.”
As you both moved to find a flashlight, the sound of voices and footsteps echoed faintly down the hall. The chaos of the power outage was clearly drawing everyone out of their rooms, and you shot Logan a knowing look.
“See?” you whispered, smirking. “Someone was bound to walk in.”
“Yeah, yeah,” he muttered, but the small, satisfied smile on his face told you he wasn’t too worried about it.
---
You might’ve gotten a bit carried away looking at magazines instead of working on your research. The lab was quiet, save for the soft hum of equipment, and you’d tucked yourself into a corner with a stack of physics journals. But one wedding magazine Logan had given you sat on top of your pile, its glossy pages begging to be flipped through. Before you knew it, you were lost in images of lace trains and intricate veils, your fingers idly twisting a strand of hair.
“Hmm, wedding dresses?”
Jean’s teasing voice pulled you from your daydream. You jumped, snapping the magazine shut and turning red. “Jean! I—uh, it’s not what it looks like. I was just…taking a break.”
Jean smirked, plucking the magazine from your hands. She flipped it open to a page you’d dog-eared. “Sure, just a break,” she said, her tone laced with playful skepticism. “You’ve already got a few favorites marked. This one’s beautiful,” she added, pointing to a gown with delicate floral embroidery.
You pushed your glasses up nervously. “I mean, yeah, but it’s too soon, right? Logan and I haven’t even set a date yet…”
Jean ignored your protests, holding up the magazine like it was her life’s mission. “Nonsense. Come on, let’s go into town and try some on.”
Your eyes widened. “Try them on? Jean, no—I couldn’t! What if someone sees? What if—”
“Relax,” she said, placing a hand on your shoulder. “It’s summer break, most of the students are gone, and you deserve a little fun. Besides,” her lips quirked in a knowing smile, “Logan gave you this magazine for a reason. You think he’d mind?”
You hesitated, torn between your shy instincts and Jean’s infectious enthusiasm. Finally, you relented. “Fine. But just for fun.”
---
The bridal boutique was a cozy, sunlit space tucked away on a quiet street. Jean wasted no time pulling dresses from the racks while you lingered nervously near the dressing rooms.
“This one,” Jean said, holding up a sleek satin gown, “or this one?” She gestured to a gown with layers of delicate tulle.
“They’re both gorgeous,” you said, shifting on your feet, “but maybe too much for me…”
Jean rolled her eyes. “You’re the bride! There’s no such thing as ‘too much.’ Now, go try these on.”
The first dress was beautiful but too heavy, and the second didn’t quite feel like you. By the third, you found yourself laughing at Jean’s exaggerated commentary.
“Okay, but look at this!” she said, adjusting the train. “You could glide down the aisle like a queen.”
“Jean,” you giggled, shaking your head, “I think I’d trip over this and take Logan down with me.”
After an hour, you still hadn’t found ‘the one,’ but the experience left you feeling lighter. “Thank you,” you said as the two of you walked back to the car. “That was actually…fun.”
Jean grinned. “Told you. And now we know what styles you like. We’ll find it when the time’s right.”
---
Back at the mansion, Logan was leaning against the kitchen counter, sipping a beer, when you walked in. He raised an eyebrow at your slightly disheveled appearance. “Where’d you two run off to?”
Jean, smirking, answered before you could. “Tried on wedding dresses.” Logan’s gaze immediately snapped to you, and his lips twitched into a small smile. Jean patted your arm. “I’ll leave you two to it,” she said, disappearing down the hall.
You shifted nervously, tugging at your sleeves. “It was her idea,” you blurted out, feeling the need to explain. “I wasn’t—well, I mean, we didn’t find anything. And it’s probably too soon anyway, right? We don’t have a date or a venue or—”
“Darlin’.” Logan’s deep voice cut through your rambling. He stepped closer, his hands gently settling on your arms. “You don’t have to plan every detail right now.”
You looked up at him, your cheeks warm. “But—”
He shook his head, a rare softness in his expression. “I don’t care what you wear or where it happens. Hell, we could go to a courthouse tomorrow and sign the damn papers for all I care.” His voice dipped, quiet and rough with emotion. “I’m just happy I finally get to marry you.”
His words hit you like a wave, their weight sinking in as you stared at him. “Logan…” you whispered, your voice barely audible.
He cupped your cheek, brushing his thumb gently over your skin. “What matters is you, sweetheart. That’s it.”
Your chest tightened, a mix of overwhelming love and relief bubbling up. You leaned into his touch, a small, teary smile breaking through. “Okay,” you murmured, resting your forehead against his. “I guess I can live with that.”
“Good,” he said, his lips quirking into a smirk. “Because you’re already perfect to me.”
---
This was a mistake.
One big, grand mistake.
Your chest heaved as you bent down with your hands on your knees, sweat dripping down your back. The morning sun filtered through the high windows of the mansion’s gym, but it offered no comfort. You were a mess—hair sticking to your face, glasses fogged up, and your lungs protesting every second of this so-called ‘workout.’
“This,” you panted, glaring at Logan, “was a mistake.”
Logan smirked, unbothered as he stood nearby, arms crossed over his broad chest. He was barely sweating, his usual tank top clinging just enough to show off his ridiculous muscles. “You’re the one who said you wanted to get stronger.”
“I didn’t know you’d try to kill me,” you shot back, collapsing onto a nearby mat. Your legs were jelly, your pride in shambles, and Logan looked way too amused.
He sauntered over, grabbing a towel from the bench. “You’re not dead,” he said casually. “You’re just outta shape.”
You groaned, throwing an arm over your face. “You’ve been alive for 100-something-years or whatever. Cut me some slack.”
“That’s not how it works, darlin’.” His voice was teasing, but there was a hint of warmth beneath it. He crouched next to you, the scent of his woodsy cologne mixed with sweat making your stomach flutter. “You gotta keep at it.”
You peeked out from under your arm, watching as he leaned closer. Logan reached out with the towel, gently wiping your forehead. “Thanks,” you mumbled, your cheeks heating from more than just exertion.
He didn’t stop there. The towel traveled down to your neck, then lower, dabbing at the sweat gathering at your collarbone. You tried not to squirm, but when he moved to the beginnings of your cleavage with a cheeky smirk, you slapped his hand away.
“Logan!” you hissed, sitting up abruptly, your face now definitely on fire.
“What?” he asked, his expression the picture of innocence. “Just helpin’ out.”
You glared at him, but the effect was ruined by the smile tugging at the corners of your lips. “You’re impossible.”
He shrugged, tossing the towel over his shoulder and standing up. “Yeah, but you love me.”
You rolled your eyes but couldn’t argue with that. “I’m never working out with you again,” you grumbled as you stood, wobbling slightly.
“Sure you are.” Logan’s hand shot out to steady you, his grip firm but gentle. “You just need the right motivation.”
“And what’s that supposed to be?” you asked, narrowing your eyes at him.
He leaned in, his voice dropping to that gravelly tone that always made your heart skip. “Maybe I’ll tell ya if you survive the next session.”
You groaned, pushing past him toward the water cooler. “I hate you.”
“No, you don’t,” he called after you, his laughter echoing in the gym. “You love me, remember?”
You muttered something under your breath that made him chuckle even harder, but despite your protests, you couldn’t stop the small smile from forming as you took a long sip of water. Maybe—just maybe—you’d let him drag you back here again. But next time, you were bringing Jean for backup.
---
“How did venue hunting go?” Jean asked, walking into the foyer where you and Logan just entered.
You let out a huff as you took off your jacket, your purse and notebook in Logan’s hands. He responded for you, “none of ‘em fit her standards.”
The jacket was draped over your arm as you snatched the notebook out of Logan’s hands. “They’re not high standards,” you said, narrowing your eyes at him.
Logan shrugged, clearly unimpressed. “Looked like every venue had a list of what they didn’t have instead of what they did.”
“That’s not true!” You flipped open the notebook, pages filled with scribbles, sticky notes, and circled bullet points. “I just want a place that works for everyone. Is that too much to ask?”
Jean smirked from where she leaned against the foyer wall. “Define ‘works for everyone.’”
You gestured with the notebook, tapping on your list. “It has to be wheelchair accessible for Charles. Child-friendly because the students will want to attend. Not too stuffy, so Logan doesn’t feel out of place—”
“Darlin’, I’m out of place everywhere,” Logan cut in with a smirk.
You ignored him, continuing, “And not too far from the mansion so the team can help in case of emergencies. Oh, and it has to have enough space for dancing, good acoustics, a separate area for food—”
“You’re planning a wedding or a state summit?” Logan teased.
Jean stifled a laugh, clearly enjoying the exchange. “She’s just thorough, Logan. You should’ve seen her face when one venue didn’t have a backup generator.”
“Backup generator? For a wedding?” Logan raised an eyebrow at you.
“Have you met us?” you shot back. “I’m not risking a power outage in the middle of the first dance.”
Jean laughed outright this time, shaking her head. “I think you’ve got your work cut out for you, Logan.”
“I always do,” Logan muttered under his breath, smirking when you swatted his arm.
“Don’t act like you’re suffering,” you said, rolling your eyes as you headed toward the living room. Logan followed, still grinning. Jean waved you off with a knowing smile before disappearing toward the kitchen.
---
A few days later, you sat cross-legged on the couch in the mansion’s common area, surrounded by more open notebooks and wedding magazines. The team buzzed around you as usual, some heading out for training while others settled in for their break. Logan strolled in, a beer in hand, and plopped down beside you.
“Still at it?” he asked, glancing at the scattered mess.
You sighed, closing one of the notebooks with a soft thud. “We’re not getting anywhere. Nothing feels right.”
Logan leaned back, taking a swig of his beer. “Then stop lookin’ so hard.”
“Easy for you to say,” you muttered. “You’re not the one trying to make sure everyone’s happy.”
“Darlin’, nobody cares where it happens. They care about you.” His tone softened as he reached over to tuck a stray strand of hair behind your ear. “Hell, we could do it right here, and it’d still be perfect.”
You blinked, caught off guard. “Here? At the mansion?”
“Why not?” he said with a shrug. “Big lawn, plenty of space, and it’s already home for most of us.”
You hesitated, glancing around the room. “It’s… not the worst idea.”
“‘Not the worst’ is high praise coming from you,” Logan teased, earning him a half-hearted glare.
“I just mean…” You bit your lip, considering it. “Who would even decorate?”
At that moment, Rogue walked by, arms full of laundry. Logan raised his voice without missing a beat. “Hey, Rogue! You feel like decorating for a wedding?”
Rogue paused, glancing between the two of you. “Uh… sure? What kinda wedding?”
Logan smirked, gesturing toward you. “Ours.”
Her face lit up. “Oh my God! Yeah, totally! I’ll get Kitty and Jubilee to help. We’ll make it look amazing.”
You blinked, overwhelmed by how quickly she agreed. “Wait—are you sure?”
“Course I’m sure!” Rogue said, beaming. “This is gonna be fun.”
As she hurried off, Logan leaned closer, his smirk widening. “See? Problem solved.”
You shook your head, laughing softly. “You’re impossible.”
“Yeah, but you love me,” he said, pulling you into his side.
You didn’t bother arguing. Instead, you rested your head on his shoulder, letting yourself imagine it: the mansion’s lawn, your friends and family, and Logan waiting for you at the end of the aisle. For the first time in weeks, the thought of your wedding didn’t feel overwhelming—it felt like home.
---
This was officially your third time going wedding dress shopping, and this time Ororo had tagged along with Jean, who had practically dragged you out of the mansion with a determined look in her eyes. The three of you entered the boutique, greeted by racks of pristine white fabric, sparkling embellishments, and soft lighting that screamed bridal fantasy.
You adjusted your glasses nervously, clutching your notebook against your chest as Jean grinned at you. “This is it,” she said confidently. “Third time’s the charm.”
Ororo gave you a calm, reassuring smile. “No pressure, Y/N. Let’s just have fun with it.”
You exhaled a little laugh. “Easier said than done. Every dress I’ve tried on feels…wrong.”
Jean looped her arm through yours. “That’s because you’re overthinking it. Trust me, when you find the one, you’ll just know.”
The three of you wandered through the racks, pulling out dresses and debating the merits of lace versus satin, mermaid cuts versus A-line. Jean’s enthusiasm was contagious, and even Ororo—usually so composed—couldn’t resist chiming in with the occasional suggestion.
“I think Logan would like something simple,” Ororo said, holding up a sleek gown with minimal embellishments.
Jean snorted. “Logan would think she’s perfect in anything. He’d probably prefer she showed up in her lab coat.”
You flushed at the thought, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. “He’s… not that bad.”
Jean raised an eyebrow. “Y/N, he kissed you in front of half the team last week just because you brought him a sandwich.”
“That was not—it was just a kiss on the cheek!” you protested, but your voice wavered.
Ororo chuckled, her eyes sparkling. “A lingering kiss on the cheek. We all saw it.”
You buried your face in your hands, groaning. “I’m going to die of embarrassment before this wedding even happens.”
Jean patted your shoulder. “If you survive Logan’s public displays of affection, you’ll survive anything.”
The teasing made you relax a little, and you found yourself smiling as the three of you continued browsing. Eventually, the shop assistant approached, her cheerful demeanor instantly putting you at ease.
“Looking for something specific?” she asked.
You hesitated. “Not really. I just…want something that feels like me.”
She nodded knowingly and began pulling a few options. One by one, you tried them on, stepping out to show Jean and Ororo each time. They offered their opinions—Jean was quick with compliments, while Ororo provided thoughtful feedback—but none of the dresses felt quite right.
Until the assistant brought out a gown you hadn’t noticed before.
It was displayed at the back of the boutique, almost tucked away as if it were waiting for someone to find it. The assistant carefully removed it from the rack and carried it over to you with a soft smile.
“This one just came in,” she explained, holding it up. The gown was breathtaking: an off-shoulder silhouette with intricate lace detailing across the bodice and delicate long sleeves. The fabric flowed into a soft, sheer train, giving it an ethereal, timeless feel.
Your breath hitched. “It’s beautiful.”
Jean’s eyes widened as she took in the dress. “Y/N, you have to try that on.”
Even Ororo, usually more reserved with her reactions, gave an approving nod. “It’s stunning. I think it might be the one.”
You hesitated, running your fingers over the delicate lace. “What if it doesn’t fit?”
Jean rolled her eyes, grabbing your shoulders and steering you toward the dressing room. “That’s what fittings are for. Go try it on. Now.”
The assistant ushered you into the dressing room, helping you into the gown. The fabric was soft against your skin, and as she adjusted the zipper, you caught your reflection in the mirror. For the first time, you felt… right.
“Ready?” the assistant asked with a knowing smile.
You nodded, stepping out tentatively. Jean and Ororo were mid-conversation but stopped as soon as they saw you.
“Oh. My. God,” Jean whispered, standing up. “Y/N, you look—wow.”
Ororo smiled warmly. “It’s perfect.”
You turned toward the mirror at the end of the room, your heart racing as you took in the sight. The dress hugged you in all the right places, the off-shoulder design framing your collarbones elegantly. The lace sleeves felt delicate but strong, and the train flowed behind you like a whisper.
“Do you think Logan will like it?” you asked softly, fidgeting with the edge of the lace.
Jean laughed, stepping beside you. “Y/N, Logan would probably think you look perfect in a potato sack. But this? He’s going to lose his mind.”
Ororo tilted her head, considering. “It suits you. It’s elegant but understated. Timeless.”
You blinked back the sudden sting of tears, overwhelmed by how right it felt. “I think… this is it.”
Jean grinned, squeezing your hand. “Finally! I told you third time’s the charm.”
The assistant beamed. “I’ll get the paperwork started and schedule a fitting to tailor it to perfection.”
As she walked away, Jean leaned closer, a mischievous glint in her eye. “So, how long do you think it’ll take Logan to rip this off you after the wedding?”
“Jean!” you squeaked, your cheeks flushing.
Ororo chuckled, shaking her head. “Some things never change.”
You buried your face in your hands, muttering, “Why did I agree to this?”
“Because you love us,” Jean teased, looping her arm through yours. “And because you knew we’d find you the perfect dress. Which we did.”
You couldn’t argue with that. For the first time since you’d started planning the wedding, you felt a sense of peace. This was happening. This was real. And you couldn’t wait to walk down the aisle and see Logan’s face when he saw you in this dress.
---
Later that evening, you were back at the mansion, lounging on the couch in the common room with a cup of tea. The dress was safely tucked away, but the memory of it lingered, making you smile softly to yourself.
Logan strolled in, fresh from a workout, a towel slung over his shoulder. He spotted you immediately, his brow quirking at your dreamy expression.
“What’s got you smilin’ like that, sweetheart?” he asked, dropping down onto the couch beside you.
You shook your head, trying to hide your grin. “Nothing.”
He gave you a look, his lips twitching into a smirk. “Nothin’, huh? That doesn’t sound suspicious at all.”
You rolled your eyes, but your blush gave you away. “Fine. I found the dress.”
Logan’s eyebrows shot up, and he leaned back, taking a long look at you. “Yeah? You happy with it?”
You nodded, the smile returning. “I think so. It feels… perfect.”
His expression softened, and he reached over, brushing a thumb along your cheek. “Good. That’s all that matters.”
For a moment, the two of you just sat there, the hum of the mansion in the background. Logan’s hand found yours, his rough fingers threading through yours gently.
“You’re sure you’re okay with the mansion for the wedding?” you asked, breaking the silence.
He chuckled. “Darlin’, as long as you’re the one walkin’ toward me, I don’t care if it’s in a field, a church, or a damn parking lot.”
You laughed softly, leaning into his side. “I’m holding you to that.”
“Hold me to whatever you want,” he murmured, pressing a kiss to the top of your head.
And in that moment, surrounded by the comfort of Logan’s presence and the thought of your future together, you couldn’t imagine anything more perfect.
---
It was three weeks away from the start of the new school year when the wedding took place. At first, you were checking on everyone—Rogue to make sure that her, Kitty, and Jubilee were making progress with the decorations outside, and on Scott and Hank who were somehow tasked with food.
At least, until Logan noticed and locked you in the makeshift bridal suite.
Jean was laughing as she turned the key in the lock, leaning against the door while you protested from the other side. “This is for your own good, Y/N! You need to relax. Everything’s under control.”
“Jean!” you called, rattling the doorknob, though your voice lacked any real anger. “I just want to check on the decorations one more time!”
“Nope,” Jean replied cheerfully through the door. “Logan’s orders. He said, and I quote, ‘she’s gonna drive herself crazy. Lock her in if you have to.’”
You groaned, leaning your forehead against the door. “I’m not crazy.”
Jean’s voice softened. “Y/N, everything’s perfect. Trust us, okay? You’ve done enough. Now let us take care of the rest.”
Ororo’s calm voice chimed in from somewhere in the room. “She’s right, you know. The decorations look beautiful. Jubilee and Kitty outdid themselves. And Scott and Hank are handling the food just fine.”
You sighed, finally stepping away from the door. “Fine. But only because I’m outnumbered.”
Jean unlocked the door and peeked her head in, grinning. “That’s the spirit.” She stepped inside, followed by Ororo, who carried a garment bag carefully over her arm. “Now, let’s focus on the fun part: getting you ready.”
You couldn’t help but smile as Ororo unzipped the bag, revealing your wedding dress. The sight of it still took your breath away. The off-shoulder gown with intricate lace detailing and long sleeves was everything you’d dreamed of, and you felt a little thrill of excitement knowing you’d soon be wearing it.
Jean gestured for you to sit down in front of the vanity, where she had already laid out an array of makeup and hair tools. “Okay, here’s the plan: Ororo’s on hair, and I’ll handle your makeup. By the time we’re done, Logan’s gonna lose his mind.”
You laughed softly, settling into the chair. “He’d better not. I don’t want him passing out before the ceremony.”
Ororo chuckled as she began gently brushing through your hair. “I think Logan’s been ready for this day since the moment he met you.”
Jean smiled warmly, her hands deftly organizing the makeup. “He really has. It’s sweet, actually. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him so happy.”
Your cheeks flushed at their words, but you couldn’t deny the warmth spreading through your chest. Logan had been a constant in your life, his gruff exterior hiding a heart that had always been devoted to you. The thought of him waiting for you at the end of the aisle made your nerves fade, replaced by anticipation.
“Okay, close your eyes,” Jean instructed, and you obeyed, letting her work her magic. The soft strokes of the brush and the hum of conversation between her and Ororo were soothing, and for the first time all day, you felt yourself relaxing.
By the time they were finished, you barely recognized yourself in the mirror. Your hair was styled in soft waves, pinned delicately to one side with small, sparkling clips. Jean’s makeup was subtle but elegant, enhancing your features without overwhelming them. You looked… radiant.
“Wow,” you breathed, turning your head slightly to take it all in. “You two are amazing.”
Jean grinned, squeezing your shoulder. “We aim to please.”
Ororo helped you into your dress, carefully fastening the buttons along the back. Once the gown was in place, she stepped back, her smile warm and approving. “You’re ready, Y/N.”
You turned to face the full-length mirror, your breath catching at the sight. The dress fit perfectly, the lace shimmering softly in the light. It was everything you’d hoped for and more.
Jean wiped at the corner of her eye dramatically. “I’m not crying. You’re crying.”
You laughed, shaking your head. “Thank you, both of you. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
Ororo placed a reassuring hand on your shoulder. “That’s what friends are for.”
There was a knock at the door, and Rogue’s voice called out. “Y/N? It’s time.”
Your heart skipped a beat as Jean and Ororo exchanged excited smiles. Ororo grabbed your bouquet, a beautiful arrangement of white roses and greenery, and handed it to you. “Let’s get you married.”
The three of you made your way downstairs, the sound of soft music drifting through the mansion. The transformation of the lawn was breathtaking. Rows of chairs lined the grass, adorned with white ribbons and small floral arrangements. An archway covered in more roses stood at the end of the aisle, with Charles waiting beneath it, his wheelchair positioned just so.
And there, standing at the end of the aisle, was Logan. Dressed in a sharp black suit, he looked both rugged and unbearably handsome, his eyes fixed on you with an intensity that made your breath catch. He looked as though nothing else in the world existed but you.
Jean gave your hand a squeeze before stepping aside to join Scott, and Ororo took her place with the other bridesmaids. Rogue beamed at you as she adjusted your train one last time. “Go get him, girl.”
You took a deep breath, your fingers tightening around your bouquet, and then you began to walk. The world seemed to blur around you, the murmurs of the guests fading into the background as Logan’s gaze held yours. Every step brought you closer to him, to the life you were about to begin together.
When you reached the end of the aisle, Logan took your hand, his grip warm and steady. He leaned in slightly, his voice low but filled with emotion. “You’re beautiful, darlin’.”
Your cheeks flushed, but you couldn’t stop the smile that spread across your face. “You clean up pretty well yourself.”
Logan’s mouth quirked into a soft smirk, but there was an unmistakable warmth in his eyes. “Didn’t want to embarrass you, darlin’. Figured I’d at least try to look the part.”
You chuckled softly, feeling the nerves melt away now that you were standing in front of him. “You look perfect.”
Logan reached up, his hand brushing lightly over yours where you gripped the bouquet. “Not as perfect as you.”
Before you could respond, Charles cleared his throat gently, his voice calm but filled with quiet authority. “Shall we begin?”
Logan’s hand tightened just slightly on yours as you both turned toward Charles, who was seated in his wheelchair beneath the archway. Behind him, the soft rustling of leaves and the faint hum of summer added a serene backdrop to the moment.
Charles’s expression was serene as he looked between you and Logan. “Today is a celebration—not only of love but of the journey that brought these two together. A journey that, I suspect, was not without its share of challenges.” His eyes twinkled with a hint of knowing, though he didn’t elaborate. “Yet here you stand, hand in hand, ready to face the future together.”
Logan’s thumb rubbed gently over the back of your hand, a quiet reassurance. You glanced up at him and found his gaze still fixed on you, steady and unshakable. It was as if the entire world could collapse around you, and Logan wouldn’t notice or care as long as you were by his side.
Charles continued, his tone gentle and deliberate. “Marriage is not just a bond but a partnership. It is built on trust, respect, and an unyielding commitment to each other. And, knowing the two of you as I do, I have no doubt that your bond is as strong as the adamantium in Logan’s skeleton.”
That earned a quiet chuckle from the guests, even Logan’s lips twitching into a smirk. You felt the corners of your mouth lift too, though your heart was pounding in your chest. Charles’s words resonated deeply, a reminder of everything you and Logan had been through to reach this moment.
Charles’s gaze softened as he addressed Logan. “Logan, do you take Y/N to be your wife? To stand by her side through every challenge, to share in her joys, and to love her fiercely for as long as you live?”
Logan didn’t hesitate for a second. “I do.”
The firmness in his voice sent a shiver through you. There was no doubt, no reservation—just pure, unwavering certainty.
Charles turned his attention to you, his expression kind. “And Y/N, do you take Logan to be your husband? To stand by his side through every challenge, to share in his joys, and to love him fiercely for as long as you live?”
Your voice came out soft but steady, the words carrying every ounce of truth you felt. “I do.”
Charles nodded, his hands resting on the arms of his wheelchair. “By the power vested in me and with the love and support of everyone here, I now pronounce you husband and wife. Logan, you may kiss the bride.”
Logan didn’t need to be told twice. He stepped closer, his hands finding your waist as he leaned down, capturing your lips in a kiss that was both tender and filled with passion. The cheers and applause from the guests barely registered as you melted into him, the world fading away until it was just the two of you.
When he finally pulled back, his forehead rested against yours, his voice low and gruff but filled with emotion. “We did it, sweetheart.”
You smiled, your fingers brushing over the lapels of his suit jacket. “We did.”
The applause grew louder as Logan took your hand, turning to face the guests. You caught sight of Jean wiping her eyes dramatically, grinning as Scott shook his head in amusement. Ororo and Rogue both looked radiant, their smiles wide as they joined the applause.
As the two of you made your way down the aisle, Logan’s hand never left yours, his grip steady and reassuring. The world felt brighter, lighter, as if every piece had finally fallen into place. You were married.
---
You walked with your eyes closed, your fingers intertwined with Logan's as he guided you through the bustling streets of Paris. The sounds of the city surrounded you—the distant hum of cars, the chatter of people, and the occasional soft clink of a café cup—but it all felt muffled, as if the world was holding its breath for the moment you’d finally open your eyes.
Logan’s grip on your hand was steady, comforting. It was an anchor, reminding you that this moment, this moment with him, was real. His voice, gruff yet affectionate, came from just above you. “Just a little bit further, darlin’,” he murmured. “Trust me.”
“Logan, this better not be some kind of elaborate prank,” you joked, trying to suppress your smile. “You know how easily I get nervous when I don’t know what’s going on.”
He chuckled softly, the sound warm in your chest. “No pranks. Just wait, you’ll see. You’re gonna love it.”
You had no idea where you were going or what he had planned. It was just you and him, alone in the magic of Paris. You’d never been this far from the mansion before, and the city felt like a whole new world, full of promise and adventure.
The air smelled different here, cleaner somehow, and there was a faint coolness to the evening breeze. You could hear the distant sounds of tourists and Parisians going about their evening, but it all felt so far away as Logan led you further down the sidewalk.
Finally, Logan stopped walking. You could sense the change in his posture, a subtle shift in how he held you.
“Alright, sweetheart,” he said, his voice lowering to a more serious tone. “Open your eyes.”
You hesitated for a moment before slowly lifting your eyelids, the city’s lights momentarily blinding you as you adjusted. And then—there it was.
The Eiffel Tower. Towering before you, it glittered with thousands of lights, shining bright against the darkening sky. But it wasn’t just the Eiffel Tower that took your breath away. Above it, the sky was painted with the vivid greens, purples, and blues of the Northern Lights.
You gasped, your eyes darting between the two spectacular sights before landing on Logan. “Logan… how… how did you know this was happening? The Northern Lights don’t usually appear in the summer…”
He smirked, a glint of mischief in his eyes. “Guess I know a few things about the world you don’t, darlin’.” He paused, taking in your stunned expression. “I might’ve had a little help, but I wanted tonight to be perfect for you.”
Your breath caught in your throat. “This… this is perfect,” you whispered, unable to tear your eyes away from the sky. “I can’t believe you knew this was going to happen.”
Logan shrugged casually, though his expression softened as he took a step closer. “I don’t know about the stars aligning, but I know how much you love the idea of things being right when they happen. Couldn’t let you miss this.” He reached out, gently tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. “I wanted you to see this. To know that, no matter what, there’s beauty in this world that’s meant for you.”
You stood there in stunned silence, the weight of his words settling in your chest. You had never imagined a moment like this—not with Logan, not in a city like this. He had this way of surprising you, of pulling something beautiful out of thin air when you least expected it. The man who had been your constant across so many lifetimes, always there, always remembering you when you had no memory of your past lives… and now, here he was, giving you a memory of your own.
You finally looked up at him, a small smile tugging at your lips. “I don’t know what I did to deserve this, but I’m so glad I’m here with you.”
Logan’s lips quirked up, the corners of his mouth softening. “You deserve everything, sweetheart,” he said, his hand finding yours again. “Everything and more.”
You squeezed his hand, feeling the warmth of his touch seep through your skin. The world around you seemed to slow, as though the Northern Lights had wrapped the two of you in a blanket of time. Here, in Paris, standing beneath the Eiffel Tower with Logan beside you, you felt like maybe—just maybe—this life would be different. Maybe this time, there would be no goodbyes.
“I love you,” you whispered, the words feeling lighter than they ever had before.
Logan’s expression softened even more, his thumb brushing over your knuckles. “I love you, too. More than anything.” He leaned in, pressing a kiss to your forehead, his voice low and steady. “You’re my everything, darlin’.”
The stars twinkled above you, and the Northern Lights danced in the sky, but in that moment, all you could see was Logan. His warmth. His presence. His unwavering certainty that you were meant to be together.
---
You scrunched your nose at the sky, the rain falling steadily as it soaked into the streets of Paris. The rhythm of the downpour created a gentle symphony against the canopy above you, and though the evening had been filled with so much warmth, the weather had shifted unexpectedly. But, despite the rain, Logan’s hand remained steady in yours, and the storm outside couldn’t quite dampen the mood between you.
Logan turned toward you, a hint of mischief playing at the corner of his mouth.
“Want to run through the rain, sweetheart?” he asked, a playful glint in his eyes.
You blinked, momentarily taken aback. “Run through the rain?”
Logan's smile spread, and he raised an eyebrow at you. “Yeah, sweetheart. What’s the worst that could happen? We get a little wet? Besides, you look great when you’re soaked.” His voice was playful, and there was a lightness to it that made you laugh again.
You glanced at the rain, the droplets now beginning to fall harder, streaking down the cobblestones of the Parisian street. It wasn’t the kind of weather you had imagined, but somehow, with Logan beside you, it felt like the perfect opportunity to break from the ordinary.
You shrugged, a smile creeping onto your face. “I guess if you can handle it, then I can too.” You squeezed his hand, trying to act more confident than you felt. After all, it wasn’t every day that you got to be in Paris, on your honeymoon, with Logan by your side.
Logan’s grin turned into something softer, and his fingers tightened around yours as he pulled you closer. “You sure about that? We can always head back to the hotel,” he said, his voice low, the warmth of it settling around you.
“No way,” you replied quickly, your tone more playful now. “Let’s do it. Just try to keep up.”
Logan chuckled under his breath and nodded, his eyes lighting up with that mischievous spark that had always drawn you in. “Alright, sweetheart. Here we go.”
Before you could take a step, he tugged you gently toward him, and in one swift motion, he was off, pulling you with him. You laughed, the sound mingling with the soft patter of rain against the street, as you ran beside him through the warm summer rain. The water splashed at your feet, your clothes quickly soaking through, but it felt like freedom—like this moment was just for the two of you.
Logan’s laughter echoed in your ears as you both sprinted down the street, the Parisian cityscape around you a blur. You felt lighter than you had in weeks, months, maybe even years. Everything was perfect. For the first time, you didn’t have to worry about the past or what the future might bring. You only had the here and now, and Logan, the one constant in your life.
Eventually, you both slowed to a stop, your breathing heavy but your hearts light. You couldn’t help but smile at Logan, who was grinning, his hair slightly damp and his shirt clinging to his chest in the most endearing way.
“That was... definitely worth it,” you said, breathless, your voice filled with amusement.
Logan caught his breath too and wiped the water from his forehead. “Told you you’d love it,” he replied, his voice softer now. He stepped toward you, his eyes never leaving yours, and before you could say anything else, he cupped your face with one hand, pulling you toward him.
His kiss was slow, tender, a contrast to the spontaneity of your run. The world seemed to stop in that moment, the sounds of the rain, the city, all fading away as you kissed him back, feeling the warmth of his lips against yours. There was something magical about it—about how he always knew how to make you feel special, even in the most unexpected moments.
When you finally pulled back, you both stood there, laughing quietly, your fingers still interlaced. “Okay, now I’m soaked,” you said, your smile never fading.
Logan chuckled, his thumb brushing against the back of your hand. “Doesn’t matter. You look beautiful either way,” he said, his voice gruff but affectionate.
You shook your head, but the smile on your face grew wider. “You’re impossible,” you teased, though the warmth of his words made your heart swell. “But I guess I wouldn’t want it any other way.”
He raised an eyebrow, his smirk never leaving his lips. “Good. I’ve got a few more surprises up my sleeve, darlin’. Just wait.”
You couldn’t help but laugh again. “I’m starting to wonder if I should be worried.”
Logan pulled you closer again, his hand resting on the small of your back, his thumb gently tracing circles. “Trust me, sweetheart. No need to worry about anything. It’s just you and me. Always.” His words, soft and certain, settled in your chest like a promise.
For a moment, you closed your eyes, letting the sound of the rain and his steady presence wash over you. The night had become everything you’d dreamed of and more. There would be no worries, no regrets—not as long as Logan was by your side.
Finally, Logan broke the silence with a mischievous glint in his eyes. “So, what do you say? You wanna keep running through the rain, or should we head back to the hotel and dry off?”
You glanced at him, your heart racing from both the run and the way he made you feel. “I think I’m ready for a change of pace,” you said, your voice soft, almost teasing. “But don’t think I’ll forget this.”
He chuckled again, his hand slipping into yours as he led the way back toward the hotel, his arm wrapping around your shoulders as the two of you walked together, side by side, under the Parisian night sky.
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if you want to know what year it is, it is 2005!
(also, again, you can imagine whatever wedding dress you want, but i based it off of this one i found when i was, once again, bored)
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ayu-stuff · 2 days ago
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Careful what you wish for...
This is not a story, but an announcement. An announcement that will make some princes and princesses' acorns and silly buttons twitch, I'm sure.
Some of you know @eratoxcalliope, also known as @akinkycouplereturns. Apart from a friendship that is increasingly developing these days, which I am most proud of, we've got a little... project in our hands, after she's realized something vital:
She married a child. Her husband is a completely overgrown toddler. A whiny little baby who needs some guidance in the grown-up world. As he's told me himself, he's only 29 months old! How cute.
So we've taken up the task of making the cutest, best behaved little princess out of him. It's so funny that such a big, strong man craves humiliation and exposure so badly. Behold my and Calliope's kiddo getting his lil bum spanked yesterday night:
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Doesn't he look soooo cute? Humbled by his Momma and Papa for throwing a tantrum like the whiny toddler he is? He was all fussy bc we hid the computer cord that allowed him lose so much time playing big boy videogames he's still too little to understand... So we had to make him listen :p. Though I think she was too lenient on the little Princess...
He's at work rn, but when he gets home, this is the stupid lil outfit waiting for him on Momma's bed (bc he will be soon transferred to the guest room...):
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Say it with me: awwwwww. Such a wittle kiddo with his cute schoolboy outfit!
Long story short, we're happy to announce we want to make his life miserable 🥰 since he's admitted us how eager he is to follow any humiliating rules we see fit. We're starting off with some easy-to-follow schoolboy rules that'll make him quiver for sure:
Appropiate language. Princess will always address the adults with respect and will not cuss or use big girl words.
Bedtime is at 8pm from now on. No buts.
No nasty hair below Princess' nose. We want a hairless little tot to make fun of.
Appropiate clothing. Princess will dress like the toddler she is at home, with little kid's underwear or pull-ups to be worn during the day.
Diapers will be worn for the night and Princess is expected to wake up wet in them. Waking up dry will be considered misbehaving.
Papa is to be greeted every morning and every night with a cute little girl voice mail. Failing to do so will have Princess punished.
Mama and Papa can always add new rules to this set if Princess misbehaves.
And that'd be it. I swear to God this is as real as pathetic it sounds. Stay stuned to see this little guy's descent to babyhood!
(And maybe, just maybe, my own descent to Calliope's bed...)
And don't forget to reblog. He'll hate love it.
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narcjsistx · 2 days ago
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𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐎𝐅 𝐒𝐎𝐋𝐃𝐈𝐄𝐑 𝐊𝐀𝐈𝐒𝐄𝐑
✶ kaiser micheal soldier official art x fem reader
✶ word count: 1.1k (1152)
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The smell of disinfectant mixed with blood is something you've become accustomed to since you've been here. The months spent at the shelter have passed quickly, yet the letters you sent so long ago don't seem to have been received, as you haven't had any response from your family
Or maybe they received the letters, but they chose not to respond. Maybe they are still angry with you for what happened, since it is not usual for a woman to run away from her family. But you didn't run away... or rather, you did, but only temporarily. At the end of the war you will return home as a married woman, perhaps even with a child in your womb. But maybe that's exactly why your family didn't respond to the letters
"Y/n, he's here" your companion says, as she rubs some liquid medicine on the soldier's knee; the man groans in pain, but you pay no attention as you step out of the tent, pushing aside the fabrics that protect it from the cold. Adjusting the miserable uniform you are wearing, you head towards the end of the shelter, passing through the bodies of the dead and living soldiers, plus those of the nurses and your companions
You step outside, placing a hand against your face to shield yourself from the sun. The light wind gently blows your clothes away, as you hear someone coming in front of you, stopping a few inches away. Smile spontaneously, lowering your arm to see who is in front of you, even if you already know it thanks to the similar smell
"Kaiser!" you say happily, as the pale face of the man you love comes into your view. Michael takes off his soldier's hat, squeezing it between his fingers as he raises his hand to place it on your rosy cheek. You tilt your face, burying your cheek in his warm palm, as if that hand hadn't taken the lives of a lot of people. But you're at war, you can't say anything against him, he's the best of his squadron and he has to do what he has to do
“Liebe” the man says, running his fingers over your cheek. Kaiser takes a few steps forward, awkwardly placing his hat on your head. You giggle, as his free hand lands on your other cheek, cupping your face in his hands “My savior”
"I'm glad to see you here. You worried me when you didn't come to my dorm last night" you say worriedly, remembering the anxiety you had felt. Kaiser is fighting a few miles away from the soldiers' shelter, and every day he tries to come to you in the morning or at night. But yesterday he didn't show up and knowing that at the front there is hard fighting, you got scared
"I know. The commander asked me to watch over some cadets" he says, taking a long breath. You nod, focusing more on the fact that your man is finally here. The sun shines on the gold trim of his uniform, the soft grey fabric accentuating his slender form. You smile, breathing a sigh of relief at seeing him alive, which is not a given "Will you stay with me tonight?" you ask hopefully, looking forward to finally feeling his tired, scarred body collapse into you, hugging you tightly. Kaiser nods "I'll be with you late at night. Wait for me, Liebe"
"Of course I will!" you say smiling even happier, happy to know that you can be with him again tonight. Micheal stares at you for a few seconds, thoughtful, then pulls your face against his, lifting your chin to better position your lips on his. You are surprised, then standing on tiptoe to reach a more comfortable height, while you enjoy the affection of your soon-to-be husband. His free hand makes room for your lower back, pushing you against him so you don't escape, as if you even remotely intend to. His lips press needily against yours, the same way he does every time because he knows he isn't absolutely sure he'll see you one last time. He's strong, you know that too, but war kills even the most hopeful
It is precisely for these kisses that you decided to follow him, when he made the decision to go and fight at the front. You have known each other since you were children, and there has always been a deep love between you, even if you have to hide it: it is not common for women to have a boyfriend before the man her family will choose as her future husband. And yet, you know for absolute certainty that you would never love someone like you love this blond boy. Your family hates him, and his father hates you, but you still decided to go with him because of how strong your feelings are, because of how much you need to hear him on your lips. You took the vows of a nurse in a soldiers' shelter near him, and as soon as the war ends he promised to marry you and make you happy, more than he already does. If you get married again, your family won't be able to separate you, especially if there could be a possible child in your womb involved once married. But the war won't end soon, or at least that's what he tells you in the evenings when he sinks into your arms. So there's still a wait
"It could all be over in less than a year, if our squadron continues to annihilate. The enemy is weak, but we must continue to advance to end all this" he says, briefly breaking away from your lips, only to leave a kiss on the tip of your nose "But, if all this is true, it means that in less than a year you will be my wife. And that is what drives me to go on, knowing that I will finally have you beside me constantly, in a house of our own and with children born of our love. I fight to have you mine as soon as possible" he says, removing his hat from your head, moving some hair from your forehead to leave a kiss "And I will make you happy, and I will be if I know that you will love me every day like the first"he says, in an affectionate tone, the one that convinces you more and more that you have made the right choice
"I can't wait, Kaiser," you say, holding onto him, the fabric of his uniform smeared against your body. "I can't wait for all of this to happen. Our children will be so happy," you say, lovingly, and he nods, hugging you close to him
"They will be, just like us. At the end of the war, we will be happy, very happy, Liebe"
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✶ 𝐌𝐘 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ; take a look, trust me!
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biancadoes1 · 7 hours ago
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Hi,
First off, thank you for posting my post. Organized Anon. I never thought people would care what I had to write, just had to get that off my chest and I love a good list lol. I guess, I have more so here is part 2. Lol
Today will be the Wild West west for Lukolas. I see people sending in post that are all over the place.
I myself am not a lukola -per se. I love Nic and Luke. I would love if they dated. But I like to remain neutral. I find it is the best for me. For me.
I am seeing posts saying Nic and Luke are beefing bc he did not post for her bday and she has not liked her post. My advice is to not engage with people who think Nic is dating Jake. It is a waste of time. You could have ET standing next to you saying aliens are real and they still will not believe you. It doesn’t matter about posts talking about the meaning of sweet one, they will not listen. The only thing to prove a jakola wrong is to let them use their brain. Trust me, if you ask question that requires thinking, in a respectful way, they will not know how to respond or what to do.
again, saying Nic is with JD bc she went to his premiere is childish. Saying she is mad with Luke and she has been showing JD off since Luke went to Rome is childish. Saying there is beef between them is childish. yes, I am even calling so called Lukolas on this site out who are agreeing with things.
there is nothing we can say to prove or show. But again, ask yourself those key questions.. if she is dating Jake and they have been out an about all this time, why not just post or tag that is who she was with in her photo. Nic has a brain and smart. We know they went to the WT movie together and we know they spend time together so why not post or tag him- and she might later do this- but why be public with JD on certain days and private with him on other days- makes no sense. No logical sense. People already think they date, so why hide him on the bday post. -Because his is most likely isnt dating him. This is just from rational thinking.
again, think rationally. Why would two adults- who play a beloved fan favorite of Polin be beefing and put in on SM for the world to think so. It’s bad for the product. Look at the Amazon show, culpa tuya. The leads are apparently beefing and yea people are talking but Polin is a different type of love story. Shonda would not let dirty laundry out so stop with the beefing theory. People sound like children. And these are grown adult women. Stop thinking that people are vindictive and want to manipulate others. Go seek therapy and figure out why toxicity is a driving force in your life. If Nic was beefing, why is Luke all over her end of year dump. His photo is on the back of her phone. At the least, they are besties.
now the million dollar question- why did he post for Claudia Bday and not Nic. There are only two possible reasons. A. JD is her man and he did not want to take away from JD on her special day. OR B. Luke is her man or her and Luke are getting close and decided to make it private - no attention. I believe the latter based on rational clues. Extra extra eyes were on them this year. Commenting on her SAG post was loud but not posting is louder. Personal stays private.
Could I be wrong yes- lol. But I’ll leave with this. If Nic is dating JD, you will have people saying she trolled the fandom. And if you are being honest, it can be seen that way. Posting and not posting jd. Jd trolling as well, saying things like people want me to marry Luke , doing that audiobook. It’s just too much. And she will get push back and fans will leave. I don’t care how nice people think JD is, he is not worth losing fans for. But let’s not think on this. We will cross that bridge, when or a big big big big if we need too. thanks!!!
.
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dangermousie · 2 days ago
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I rolled my eyes at the groom saying he will never sleep with his wife because she's a merchant.
Not rolling my eyes because of disdain but because of that relatively new cdrama need to keep heroine pristine for her eventual man even tho it makes no sense. Think of Dream of Splendor where they insisted she was a virgin despite being a performer. And now here - I could see a man disdaining his low born wife but to leave her untouched? Really?
If it was a one-off, it would be one thing but this is very much part of a pattern.
Long gone are the days when Shu Qi's FL had to whore herself for her gross assassin master and still ended up happily with Wallace Huo's idealistic scholar in Red Dust or Dilraba’s FL slept with and had another man’s child despite being eventually part of an OTP with Zhang Bin Bin in The King’s Woman or Imperial Doctress where Liu Shi Shi was married to and raped by her husband and eventually ended up with true love emperor Wallace Huo or Zhang Xinyi's Princess having to sleep with her gross husband despite being in mutual forbidden love with his brother played by Yuan Hong, and ending up happily with him eventually (or, to use a more recent example, Tang Yan having to sleep with her husband but eventually ending up with her first and true love Shawn Dou's character in The Princess Weiyoung.)
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slytherinshua · 1 day ago
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★ MARRIED LIFE ( 부승관 )
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genre fluff , established marriage , husband!seungkwan x fem!reader   cw none   wc 705   request no   note for my beloved rania @wheeboo happy birthday!!! officially two decades old, what a grandma (but an iconic one) skdjsk anyway i hope you enjoy this and i love you very much <33   net @kstrucknet
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Seungkwan liked keeping himself busy. Waking up at the crack of dawn and starting work almost immediately (though, not before he gets his hand on an iced americano), was his usual routine. He liked his routine. He liked keeping busy. Whether it was keeping his mind off of anything hard in his life, or the satisfaction of getting work done; Seungkwan worked relentlessly, and he never stopped. 
As for breaks, they were nice at times when everything got a little overwhelming, but he never really craved one. Seungkwan found himself bored if left alone. He’d always drag one of his friends into doing something with him, even during a break. Who could blame him? He lived for the fun of life.
But it was only after he had met you, dated for years, and finally tied the knot that he truly started to yearn for time off. His friends first thought he was going crazy when he was the first to suggest getting off work early. The workaholic wanting to stop working was never a good sign. But Soonyoung was the one to catch on first. Seungkwan was a newlywed husband, after all. 
The teasing he endured just for wanting to go back home to you was immense. 
But he forgot all about it as soon as he stepped foot into the house that he had bought with you, the one that you had quickly made feel like a home, despite it being a little unfamiliar to you both still. The hours he had spent trying to get himself to focus on work and not think about you every second paid off the second he returned to you. 
You didn’t mind that the few days after your wedding were nothing grand or out of the ordinary, and instead enjoyed the simple task of waiting for him to get back from work. With Seungkwan being such a big celebrity, even keeping your marriage under wraps was a task itself. You were content to wait until he had some time off to go on a bigger trip for your official honeymoon. Until then, it wasn’t like any of the excitement and affection from the wedding day had worn off.  
It was clear in the way you ran into his arms as soon as he had closed the door behind him. Clear in the way he pulled you into a kiss immediately, the sweet taste of cherry on your lips finding its way to his tongue. Clear in your satisfied hums in between his fervent kisses and the way his grip on your waist grew tighter, pulling you ever closer. 
The newlywed elation certainly hadn’t been dampened in the past week, no matter how long Seungkwan was cooped up at work, the amount of teasing he was sure to hear from his group mates, or the number of hours you had to wait for his return. Everything fell exactly in its proper place as soon as you were back in Seungkwan’s arms, and you relished every bit of warmth that his hold held. 
It was strange how significant the shift had been from dating to being married. Everything felt new and exciting, but at the same time, it was all comfortable and familiar as it always had the past few years. 
Everytime you looked at the ring on your finger, you were reminded all over again of the exact reason why you had fallen in love with Seungkwan in the first place. Nothing made you happier or prouder than to be able to call yourself his wife, although you couldn’t quite compete with Seungkwan’s pride whenever he reminded anyone he was now a married man. 
And, perhaps married life had changed him, even in just a few days. The man who barely knew how to relax and spend vacation time now craved to spend every single hour with you. Though, Seungkwan supposed he did have the rest of his life by your side to savour. 
But would that amount of time be enough to suffice? Seungkwan wasn’t quite sure. What he did know was that he would spend the rest of eternity with you just as you were now, even if at the end he still wanted more.
svt taglist (bolded could not be tagged): @kangtaehyunzzz,, @eternalgyu,, @ddeonudepressions,, @hannahsophie0103,, @cham3li,,
@shuabby1994,, @icyminghao,, @98-0603,, @weird-bookworm,, @candewlsy,,
@wonwooz1,, @blossominghunnie,, @haecien,, @amara-mars,, @okshu,,
@parkjennykim,, @wootify,, @svtoose,, @seunghancore,, @ujisworld,,
@sobun1est,, @bananabubble,, @talkingsaxy,, @thesunsfullmoon,, @talking-saxy,,
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@lexeees,, @xikskrrrs,, @cupidslovearrows
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m-jelly · 1 day ago
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Hello Jelly! I hope your days are going good, happy late new year! If your requests are open and you're willing to write it, I have one. A Levi x reader who's a Selkie (A woman who can change between a seal and human by taking on/off her seal skin) where reader meets Levi in the corps. She was trying to bargain for her skin back from someone (who was trying to get married to reader by hiding her skin) and Levi steps in. They form a friendship, eventually fall for one another, and they get married. But what happens after she gets her skin back is up to you, feel free to ignore though.
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What makes you whole.
Levi x selkie fem reader
Canon world, post-war Levi, married couple, emotional, slight angst, romance.
After settling down after the war ended Levi manages to track down your lost skin stolen from you. Conflicted by his feelings and what to do, he finally decides it's best to hand it back over to you and accept whatever you choose to do.
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When he gazed at your skin, it was hard to know how to feel. It brought him joy knowing that the very thing that brought you together was right in front of him. It was so beautiful too, which was so typical of you to be incredibly beautiful because you always were.
Levi remembered when he first met you almost falling apart as you pleaded with a man for your selkie skin back, but he would only gift it if you married him. He saved you and discovered the man never had your skin. That meeting started everything, your romance and life grew from then on.
The love Levi had for you was deep and strong, so knowing he could possibly lose you by handing over this skin hurt his heart. Honesty was important between you and him, you'd tell him everything and he would you. Having this skin and not telling you would be a horrible sin.
He collected the skin wrapped it up and placed it in his bag. He grabbed the walking stick you gifted him and made his way home. Each step towards your home on the beach he felt a sinking feeling in his heart. You were a divine creature of the ocean, surely you'd leave him to go home.
He stopped when he came to the house and saw you outside hanging the washing. The bag he was holding felt unbelievably heavy. He released it causing it to thud against the floor. A sob of despair escaped him causing you to look over.
Hearing you run over and calling out his name only broke him more. Would this be the last time you'd run to him? Would this be the last time you held him? Was this the end of his happy life and love?
You cradled Levi's perfect face in your hands. "Darling, talk to me. What's wrong? Levi, please."
He shook a little unable to string a sentence together, so he simply said. "Bag."
"Bag?" Confusion was etched on your face. "What do you mean?"
He persisted and pointed. "Bag."
Piecing things together a little, you crouched down and opened the bag. Your hands stilled when you recognised what your husband had brought to you, your skin was back. "Levi, I..." You cast your gaze up to your husband who was breaking. "Thank you for finding it."
His legs gave in making him slip to the floor, but you caught him and cradled him in your loving arms. He sobbed your name. "I will miss you."
You frowned at his words. "Miss me? Am I going somewhere?"
He clung to you. "The ocean. It's you're home. You can go home now."
"Home?"
"Yes."
You shifted your wonderful body and cradled his face. "Levi, I'm not going anywhere. I'm not leaving you because I'm already home."
He sniffed as your words started to sink in, the pain in his heart subsided as love spread through him. "You are?"
Tears ran down your cheeks as you smiled. "Oh, you beautiful and romantic man. Yes, I am home. You are my home. I'm not going anywhere unless it is with you. I love you, Levi. I love you more than anything in this world." You kissed him passionately and tried to push your feelings into the kiss. "I love you."
Levi's pain washed away from your words and actions. "I love you too. I love you so much. You're my everything." He tilted his head and kissed you over and over, the more he did the more heated it became. "Thank you, thank you for staying."
You hummed a gentle laugh. "You're stuck with me, darling husband. I'm not going anywhere." You got up and pulled him with you. "Let's get you inside and this skin."
Levi grabbed the bag. "I've got it."
"It'll be a fun thing to show our kids. Mummy's seal skin."
A blush consumed Levi's cheeks and he walked with you home. "Yeah, it'll be fun for them."
You placed the bag down on the side before wrapping your arms around Levi. "Did you think I was going to leave you?"
"Mm."
You rubbed his back. "I'll never leave you. I'm yours, Levi."
He released a long sigh. "I know that now. I love you."
You kissed his cheek. "Thank you for thinking of me. I'm shocked you were willing to let me go, but that'd never happen. I'm forever yours."
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@ladycheesington @levisbrat25 @nyxiieluna @li-anne @galactict3a @youre-ackermine @thebobaprincess @2moth-anon2 @cypidity @nbinairyn @bts-spnlvr12 @darkstarlight82 @emilyyyy-08 @levistealeaf @pelicanpizza @hideandgopeep @notgoodforlife @demonic-bird @searriously @anti-cupid @abiatackerman
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softfem-dom · 8 hours ago
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the four times they asked about his sidekick, and the one he realized why "worst" wolverine + deadpool & suicidal! teen! fem reader 🔌🌿 PROLOGUE / 0.5
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a/n : so, yeah, I'm rewritting the story because I feel like I just jumped straight into the plot without giving context on reader's view of herself and the world and that just feels unfair to me lol😭
synopsis :
think of batman and robin. the steriotypical father-son relationship that every superhero has with their younger sidekick. deadpool has a sidekick too, as young as lost as Jason when Bruce found him. He takes care of her, too, Althea has welcomed her into the appartment. but, stop a moment. pause, rewind. What happened to batman's first robin?
or a glimpse into the universe where Wade has not triumphed, but taken the longest to fail.
wordcount : .. — masterlist | navigation post
tags/warnings : dead dove do not eat, suicide centric, depression centric, sh themes, dark thoughts, realistic wade in means of being unable to look after a kid, multiple bruce wayne and jason todd references/parallels.
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You sat at the edge of your bed, the room around you suffused with a delicate silence, as if the world was holding it's breath in anticipation. Outside, the sky was a pale canvas, as white as untouched snow, whispering promises of a purity you could never grasp. Lace hugging your body, each thread tangled with the color of things never touched, of a life never claimed.
The veil hung before your eyes, a soft mist, waiting to drape you in a wedding gown meant for a day you would never live to see—your own wedding turned a funeral, final vows exchanged with nothing but hollow echoes of your name, of who you could have become.
As a teenager that had never had her first kiss, never had a confession of silly highschool love whispered to, you had started to romantizicise being untouched, a bride for no one, body meant for no man’s hands, no lover’s kiss. Only the cold of the veil, the sweet surrender of lace, would be your company. The frills at the edges of your thoughts were like a dress stitched together from the fragile dreams of those who once whispered of futures you could never wear.
"She'll be a doctor" "no, she'll be an artirst" "a musician" "a teacher" "a lover" "a mother", those expectations were irrelevant now had they ever been relevant in the first place?
In this space, this stillness, you were an untouched promise—pure, soul as white as the ghosts that plagued the corners of your mind.
And in this quiet, you wondered if dying a virgin, untouched by anything but the loneliness in your chest, if having your body so clean to make up for the dirty of your mind, might be the only way of entering the pearly gates of heaven.
You'd step into the altar, covered in white frills and lace to hide the darkness inside your head, and marry the death that was slowly crawling closer and closer to you. Maybe that way you wouldn't disappoint the only person left to smile at you, maybe that was the only way to not turn into the villains he dispised so much.
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softfem-dom© do not repost!!
🏷@justatinybud @bimboshaggy @prettyoatmeal @strawberrylore @ggraciebaby @fries11 @delfinadolphin @fakeguysarehot @stupid-little-birdie @sodavrr @doodle-with-rhy @psychic-psi @fanficcrow @ayamenimthiriel @longpondlibrary @whyamistillontumbler @wingdings41103 @kneelforloki @dreamscape-basement @adamsdicklicker @snackthatsmilesbackchlldren @taextannie @kat-thepoet @randomidk-123 @misaki-kira8 @ontheblackstar @bumblebee-art-blog @summonthewinchesters @livingordeadwhoknows @caramelised-onions @ktluvsmen @holylonelyponyeatingmacaron-blog @amaltheiav @whiskytoast @bubblegumfrosting @scarlettsoldier @empress-ruby @sunlix143 @bbydeers @ciaratomioka1432 @cometenthusiast @gothamnighthawk @fyodorssimp1 @i-write-stories-not-sins-bitch @riskyraiker @simpingoncarmensandiego @lavenyy @makepastanotwar @theregretfulsouls @soundofmassconfusion @exactlyclevercowboy-blog
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writingforaliens · 23 hours ago
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I have been summoned!
Lily Taverel, better known during her Blackstaff days as "Tav", met Gale roughly 15 years before the events of BG3, when the two were the equivalent of grad students. Quiet and shy at first, Lily found her first real friend in her academic rival and officemate, and, over time, she revealed to Gale many, if not all, of her secrets: her loneliness, her neglectful, abusive parents, her pain and fear of being last. She even showed him her true self: Lilyseah Mithrellas, a half-elf who kept her features carefully obscured by an enchantment. And like most autistic nerds, they overthought their relationship constantly, leaving a lot of feelings unconfessed. When they finished their studies, Lily left for her "post-doc". Though they wrote each other often, and even visited each other with regularity, they continued to rationalize themselves out of any confessions or actions. Perhaps it was fear of the way they were just so made for each other, that nothing could be that perfect, that kept them apart, perhaps it was their inability to read people, perhaps it was the fear of driving away the best thing they'd ever known.
Around four years before BG3, Gale's letters stopped being addressed to "Lily" in favor of "Tav" before ceasing entirely over the course of the next year. Despite pleading to know what she did wrong and apologies for whatever it was, she never heard back. So, for the next three years, she tried over and over and over again to stop loving him, to little success.
She locked those feelings deep, deep in her chest, hoping they would someday shrink enough to be bearable.
When she helps Shadowheart pull a person from the half-functioning portal, the last one she expects to see is Gale Dekarios, the man that both she and his mother believed dead in some godsforsaken corner of the realm. The very same man that she'd been attempting to find on his mother's behalf.
And she's pissed.
Lily's already had a trying day, and he simply walks back into her life like her heart hasn't been shattered and now stomped on. Like he doesn't owe her an explanation. But, truth be told, despite her every wish to stay angry because he should deserve it, because he should beg her forgiveness, she can't stay that angry at him for long, not when they can still predict each other's movements and thoughts. Not when he still makes her laugh. Not when he comes to her and asks if she has any enchanted items.
And especially not when he finally apologizes and explains everything to her right after.
It's a fast, easy tumble from there to where they were years ago, an even easier tumble from there to quiet confessions on the cold floor of a Sharran temple, and, despite a small breakdown when Lily is forced to confront some more of her traumas, easier yet to a proposal and a pledge to each other not a day after the death of Ketheric Thorm.
They are legally married by the magistrate of some tiny town between Reithwin and Baldur’s Gate, at the last possible minute before the office closes--much to the frustration of said magistrate--with Tara being their only witness.
It takes some convincing, but Lily eventually agrees to a celebration in Waterdeep, and Gale gets to show off his wife, the one that almost everyone expected was coming at some point and no one is actually surprised by.
A Tav who knew Gale before. A Tav who might have loved him before. Before Mystra, before the orb, before his whole world came crashing down. They know him to be precise, logical, unrivalled in his craft. Then he disappeared. But who was Tav? They might have been a colleague, that sense of satisfaction they felt after his downfall suddenly vanishing as they really look at him for the first time. An old “friend” – they got drunk together down at the Yawning Portal once, counts as a friend, right? Did something else happen? Really, they don’t remember much at all, but the way they tiptoe around each other may be enough of an answer. A former lover, cast aside over his need to please a Goddess, finding themselves face to face with him again after years, unable to deny that same old spark. Doesn’t matter – whoever Tav was, whoever they are now – Gale certainly isn’t the same. How strange it must have been for both of them to have such different views of each other compared to their other companions, who only know this version of them. So imagine Tavs reluctance when they start feeling those butterflies. Imagine Gale, who will never be the same again – who is terrified because he will never be the same again – so desperate to give Tav a glimpse of his former glory, only for them to love him the way he is.
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deleteddewewted · 19 hours ago
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I don't know if this might be an idea for you, but...
I'm still getting to know the Warhammer universe in depth, but I started a draft a while ago. It was supposed to be an oneshot, but it became huge and I ended up putting it aside because I lacked creativity.
But anyway : I had started that the emperor wasn't such an idiot, he sort of had some feelings for his children (not looking at them as tools) and in order for humanity to prevail he sort of goes from world to world looking for political alliances (so he marries his son and takes a planet for himself). Horus would fall into chaos because the one chosen him, in the vision of a shaman, she was the future with Guilliman after the fall of the emperor and also the OC had an enormous love for Guilliman (a beautiful feeling), but Roboute had a relationship with Yvraine, even if the emperor didn't approve.
The OC would be a witch/wizard (I don't know if she fits in this universe without being killed for heresy, or if they'll let it go because... script 😬 )
I'm still figuring out how to develop it or whether to delete it and start another way, what do you think?
It's a lot of information, you can ignore it 🙃
Sorry for the mistakes, English is not my language .
Preventing Destiny
Horus x Fem! Reader
A/n: This is such a good idea! I hope you post it someday. This inspired something in me and now i have to make a series similar your idea anon. Consider this part 1 out of 2 or 3 parts.
MDNI
W: NSFW, Fluff, Angst, Jealousy, Baby Trapping, Abandonment, Pre-Heresy Horus, Fem Reader, Insecurities, Zero accommodation
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Love was such a finicky thing. It drove mortal men to madness, created wars in the battle of ideals, made orphans out of children, and made men into beasts. Horus watched as their crusade brought great benefit to the Imperium, one by one uniting the human colonies under the same flag and set of ideals Horus' father sought to make true. But war was not the only thing that united them all, no, unions and treaties did as well. His father bestowed upon him an offer he couldn't reject. Marriage in holy union over sought by the Emperor himself. His father told him of his adventures into the stars, how in his own search he had found an idealic planet with idealic people. That he had found a woman worthy of his son and his glory. Horus' ego grew as he awaited the day he would be introduced to you.
You met on your home planet. Your parents had agreed to follow the lead of the Emperor as long as he allowed them to continue to rule with his guidance. This was agreed upon but with a condition that left your parents speechless. The man adorned in golden armor mentioned a son of his, one that will one day become his heir to all that he had made. He wanted you to wed, to show that there is no ill will between your planet and the greater Imperium. Your parents eagerly waited with bated breath for your response, and when you agreed, the Emperor smiled down at you and promised you that this would bring great fortune to everyone. You met Horus not a day later. He was brought to your chambers and he had the opportunity to introduce himself to you. His hair was short and he had a faint stuble growing in. He looked rugged and handsome all the same and it lit a flame in your chest that you wished would persist.
Horus on the other hand was smitten even before meeting you. His father had described you after he insisted on knowing who his wife would be. His father described you as being a normal baseline, with nothing of importance other than your ancestry and the planet you bring with you, but Horus wanted more. He wanted details about your features, the way your voice sounded, he wanted to know if you were as eager as him to marry and to meet. He was like a child shaking in anticipation. He needed to know who you were as you would one day be his and he only yours. He begged his father to allow you both to meet on your planet as you make you more comfortable. Meeting in your chambers allowed him to truly grasp who you were as a person. You had a love for all things relating to your people, you adored your parents and you were educated in the law. You cared to learn more about the Imperium to better fulfill your duties as his wife.
"There's no need to push yourself so much, my wife." He had grabbed your hand in his, yours being dwarfed by his, and pressed the back of it to his lips in a chaste kiss.
"I will ensure you to date with everything but you do not need to worry about it. You will have greater things to do when it comes our Legion and our sons."
"Our sons?" You questioned, brow raised as you looked at the man before you.
"Yes, our sons. My Legion awaits for their mother. And if you will allow it, our own sons and daughters.” He had placed a kiss on your hand before pressing it against his cheek. He knew that you were the only woman for him. His eyes would never wonder, his love would never fade. You made him feel like a man and he would fulfill you as a woman.
Married life was blissful to him as his wife dotted on him hand and foot, and he would do the same. He would come back to his chambers only find her reading or sleeping and the moment his presence was made known she would drop everything to take care of him. You would take care of his wounds, ensure he was clean from head to toe by preparing him a bath. You devoted yourself to proving that you were an idealic wife only to be reminded that he had his own needs to prove himself a worthy husband. He would massage your feet and take care of you when sick. He would have the servants in the palace fetch you whatever you so desire. Only the finest food would be reserved for you. Only the best gifts would be given to you. Nothing would prevent him from sending you letters that were filled with promises of coming back and making you both complete with a child. He couldn’t have asked for a more dutiful partner that matched him.
But it all came crashing down when a shaman they had captured asked him if he wanted to see fate, to witness his future as it was already set. Horus had assumed that the old hag had simply done this to stop them from killing her but he was corrected when they did not flinch at the tip of his sword cutting into their skin. He agreed, curiosity getting the best of him. The shaman mixed powders, and liquids into a ranging flame and chanted words he did not know nor understood. In the smoke appeared your image but Horus was not the one standing next to you. Guilliman was there instead. You were kissing Guilliman, deeper and more lovingly than you’ve ever kissed him. You spoke his brother's name with breathless want unlike how you spoke his own. You were as dotting and as diligent as how you were with Horus but you looked more in love with his damn brother. Image after image of you and his blond-haired brother kissing and living in married bliss set a fire inside him he tried to quell and snuff, but it consumed him. It ate at him as the shaman prophesied that it was only a matter of time before this woman Horus wedded would leave him and fall in love with Guilliman. That if he wanted to preserve his marriage he had to keep you apart and even then it wouldn’t be guaranteed that you would remain faithful. That destiny and fate were never wrong and that no matter his efforts you would leave.
Horus laughed at the shaman in something that almost felt bitter as he promised that his wife was faithful and only had room to love him. But he knew deep down that he was lying to himself and he simply couldn’t have this hag have him bested. Either a swift movement he cut off her head and watched it roll onto the floor as her body slumped forward into the flame. Blood pooled around the corpse and dripped from his sword.
“You are wrong old witch. She is mine. She was promised to me!” He let out in a bitter rage. He walked away, not bothering to take any kind of trophy from his spoils and made it back to his ship with the rest of his sons. He told them to take off a she’s snack to Terra, that they were done here and that there was nothing of value on this planet but only lies and decit.
Once home, he arrived with a new fond vigor and let it all out on you. He smelled of sweat and musk, something manly and oddly attractive. He didn’t bother removing most of his armor but just enough so he could fuck you and have you near to his skin. He watched you pant and moan into the air as he grunted out promises to make you a mother. There was nothing that would take you from him. Nothing.
His father grew unpleased with Horus' petulant attitude. He was acting like a child with how he wouldn't introduce his wife to his brothers. He had promised you to introduce you to all of his brothers, that he would have you known to the galaxy and beyond as his wife and now he was planning on retracting that promise. What if you did leave him for his brother? Why were prophecized to be with Guilliman and not him? Anger consumed his thoughts but he quelled them as he promised his father that he would introduce you soon.
Horus spent an entire day with you, more than he had ever been allotted to spend with you since he was constantly busy, and asked you if you wished to meet his brothers soon. You said yes, happy to finally meet the rest of his family as you had only briefly met the Emperor and that was all. Even your wedding my was a private affair with only your parents and the Emperor to bear witness. To finally meet your husbands siblings meant a great deal to you as you had nine to your own and was desperate to find family.
So began his great plan to keep you faithful and longing for him as the date came ever closer for you to meet his brothers. He promised you riches, promised you children that he didn’t even know if he could give you, granted you every wish you had so you wouldn’t seek it from someone else. All of the nights he had available where spent keeping you in bed with him, cock warning him or him tasting your cunt hoping you would appreciate his careful and attentive care to your needs. He spent his morning showering you in compliments and promising you that he will return to you.
All of this was for not when he finally had to comply and introduce you to his brothers. His father had arranged a small event to host in the palaces garden, hoping to have all of his sons together to celebrate their success in their crusade. While many of his brothers and their sons had arrived already, there was still a few missing as they were busy with final reports and or just arriving. Horus had dressed in his best pelts and downed light armor in his legions colors. You did the same, wearing a loose fitting dress that was decorated with golden trim and design. There was not mistaking who you were, you were his wife and the mother to his sons. His father had warned him to play nice, that you were not a toy but a diplomat as well.
“Do not hinder her, my son.” He had scolded before leaving him be and heading towards the great garden that was filled with music, laugh, and cheer.
Pleasantries were easy as drink and food flowed through the palace. You found it oddly natural to speak to many of his brothers as they all seemed to be similar in personality or at least feigned politeness. You slowly made your way to each brother and finally arrived at the last one who had been entertaining some of his nephews. Guilliman was wearing his people’s attire, a toga colored blue and with the insignia of his chapter proudly displayed in a golden lapel that kept his cape still on his shoulders. His golden lorals were exchanged for real leafs and his armored boots were traded for sandals. He was relaxed, sipping on the wine that was in his chalice.
Horus hoped you would show disinterest in Guilliman, that you wouldn’t want to approach him, that his younger brother was disinteresting enough to make you look away. But no, you approached him, your small hand finding place on your beloved husbands arm as you dragged him over to meet his brother. He complied, hoping that the interecation would be short and brief as this was what he was dreading.
“Brother, this is my lovely wife, Y/n. Mother to my sons, Legionnaire mother of the Luna Wolves.” Horus voice boomed at the last part, almost as he was reemphasizing that you were already spoken for and already had a legion of your own. You smiled and bowed your head at Guilliman, Berle standing straight and meeting his eyes.
“It is a pleasure to meet you Lord Guilliman. My husband has spoken good thing about you, I can assure you.” Your joked. Guilliman let out a small chuckle, a smile blooming on his face as he nodded and joked back that he sure hope so.
You smiled brighter than you ever did with Horus. His brother spoke about his latest victory, detailing the assault and the execution of his plan all while gesturing with his hands. You were entertained by his brothers stories and it left a bitter taste in Horus’ mouth. No, this wouldn’t happen and couldn’t happen. Not here. Not in front of all of these people. Not in front of their father who had promised you to him. You were his. You were his! His wife, the mother to his sons. You couldn’t do this to him!
He grabbed you by the waist and dragged you away to his chambers without even saying goodbye. He threw his brother a quick smile and lead you back to his chambers where he threw you on to his bed and began stripping himself of his clothes as he watched you intently.
“Horus-“ he cut you off with a kiss as he began stripping you of your clothes too. Your clothes were torn and your moans were muffled by his mouth. It only pushed him to go further. He grabbed you by your legs and pushed them up to your ears, his arms and legs making sure to keep you spread open for him. He made use of his hands, his mouth, his cock to pleasure you tenfold so you wouldn't think of anyone other than him. He watched you gasp as he fucked into you and promised you he would ensure that you lay pregnant with his child after this. There was no tenderness in his actions. The once gentle man who would treat you like porcelain when he made love to you was now fucking you like a dog in heat and you his bitch to breed. His mouth found hole on your skin, biting and nipping at it as he thrusted into you. His ablks slapped against your ass as he used one of his hands to play with your clit and rub it as you began to scream that you were close. He didn’t care of you were close or not. He just needed you to remember that you were his first and you were his forever.
“Horus! I can’t-!” You choked out, back arching as you clung to him for dear life as his continues thrust made the bed shake.
“Come for me, Y/n.” He huffed. He tightens his grip around your legs, making sure his hand kept them together and still as he watched your pussy take his cock with ease.
“Let me breed and film you with my children.” He picked up pace before slapping your ass and cumming inside you. His cum began to leak out do you but he wasn’t done yet. More and more of his seed was released into your womb and all he did was watch as it began to coat his dick and your ass.
“Good. I’m sure we will have a welcomed surprise in due time.” He panted out. You lay still as you waited for your husband to pull out of you but he never did. Instead, he grabbed you and pulled you closer to him before he turned you both over and had you laying on his chest as he later on the bed. You could hear the loud thrumming of his heart in his chest as he slowly came down from his climax.
“It was rude to just leave, Horus. You owe your brothers an apology.” You teased, not truly caring as you could barely think in the moment. You were full and could still feel how cum leaked out of your abused and swollen pussy. Horus had never been so eager or predator like before, not even when you asked him to be. You wondered if you would get more opportunities to experience this side of him in bed.
You fell asleep listening to your husbands heartbeat, warm and protected in his arms when Horus lay awake watching you. You were his, child ir jot he would make sure you stayed by him as you were given to him to wed. If you wanted to leave him for his brother you would find that nothing you did wojld set you free. Nothing. You were his and he was yours.
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eatmeandbirthmeagain · 2 days ago
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С Hello, hello, dear author, I am so addicted to your works that I can fully say that you are simply the best writer I have ever seen, I simply melt from your works related to Baldwin,Seriously!I would like to read something sad, so I would like to ask you to write something sad, where Baldwin and Y/N They are married, everything is fine with them, but one day Y/n became terribly ill with some kind of disease,it soon becomes clear that this is a dangerous disease and unfortunately Y/n dies, and Baldwin is saddened and broken.
)(English is not my native language, so I apologize for the mistakes and thank you in advance author!)!!
♧ Everything Is Worse Now - King Baldwin x Reader ♧
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♧ Angst ♧
A/N: Hello dear Sevina!! I am so greatful for your support and your such kind words, you have no idea how much they mean to me🫶. Thank you so much for this beautiful and sad request, it was a pleasure to write and I hope you enjoy it!! As always, this is based on the film Kingdom Of Heaven, not the real historical figures. Enjoy!
P.S. Im sorry this is so short, I wanted it to be more like a uhh poem kind of I guess?? Like short and sweet yk?? Idk if I'm making any sence but I hope you all enjoy!! Also SORRY FOR ALL THE ANGST. Next one will be fluffy I prommise 😭😭
TW: Death, Disease, Leprosy, Not a happy ending
It was an abnormally cold evening when it began.
The queen's condition had been faltering for a few days now, but she merely brushed it off as fatigue. Things had been stressful with the threat of invasion any day now, it was only natural to feel exhausted at times such as these.
Nevertheless, the young king was deeply concerned about his wife.
“Please my love, I need you to see one of my physicians. It could be serious-”
“Darling, I can assure you that I am perfectly fine. Truely, there is no need to fret, you have enough to be worried about. Please don't let my condition weigh on your mind” she had told him, taking his hands in hers with that gentle firmness that he so adored.
It only became worse from there. Baldwin had been attending a meeting when he received news that y/n had collapsed while walking the gardens.
He abandoned the meeting in a second and used every ounce of his strength to climb the stairs to the royal chambers where he was met with the horrific sight of his beautiful wife, pale and weak, laying atop their shared bed with physicians working at her side.
He staggered to her side, about to collapse himself, and took her hand pressing it to the cool metal of his mask.
The familiar sensation caused y/n to open her eyes to look at her husband.
She smiled weakly.
“Perhaps I should have been checked out sooner hm?” she chuckled.
Baldwin couldn't help but smile sadly. Even in the darkest times she always managed to make him smile.
Naturally, the young king assumed the worst possible scenario: That his vile disease had been passed to his beautiful wife.
He could barely think of the possibility without breaking down right there and then so he attempted to keep his mind away from the idea.
“My lord?” a physician spoke gently beside him.
Baldwin looked up at the young man expectantly, “may I speak with you a moment?” the physician asked.
The king nodded, giving y/n one last look before walking towards the door.
“Do you know what could be wrong?” he asked, his voice trembling with fear.
“We have a fair idea, my lord. Her symptoms match that of the flu. It is a European disease, this is all we know so far”.
Baldwin's heart sank and felt relieved at the same time.
On one hand, his worst fear had not come true and his perfect wife had not been tainted by his vile flesh. But on the other hand, she was still very ill with a disease he had only read about in books.
He felt light headed but was determined to stay on his feet. He had to be strong for her. 
---------------------------------------------------
Her condition worsened further from that day onwards, as did the rumours in the castle.
Guy was of the firm belief that Baldwin had contaminated the queen with his vile disease and all of his followers and friends were of the same view.
Baldwin himself avoided everyone and everything that wasn't y/n.
Despite the warnings from the physicians that she may pass her disease onto him, thus killing him faster, he didn't care.
“I'm dying anyway, what's the point in avoiding it if she’s not going to be by my side in a few weeks” he told them.
They spent every moment together, taking in their last few days by each other's sides. Y/n could barely move and her fever made her weak but Baldwin could not care any less.
He read to her, prayed over her and spoke of his days to her, even if she didn't have the strength to reply.
This was exactly what she had promised to do for him in his last days, it didn't seem right to be the other way around. They even continued to sleep side by side. Just as if nothing happened at all.
When y/n would wake in the night, brought to consciousness by the low grade fever, she would admire her sleeping husband.
“I’m so sorry” she would whisper.
“I'm so sorry that I have to leave you. It wasn't supposed to be like this”.
---------------------------------------------------
It wasn't until another abnormally cold morning that Baldwin opened his eyes to find her stiff with the icy touch of death.
He sat up and wept at the sight until physicians came to take him to another room. Baldwin was simply inconsolable and he stayed that way for days.
He became a shell of a man. Refusing to leave his chambers or even eat.
“You must snap out of this and tend to your kingdom” Sybilla had told him.
“The land will be in ruins if you continue like this-”
“I care not for the land any longer!” he snapped.
“Let your foul husband have it to himself for all I care” he said with a wave of his hand as he began to cry again.
Sybilla put a hand on her brother's back, “just because she is gone doesn't mean you must go with her” she said gently.
“I see no use in living if she can't be by my side. I'm dying anyway Sybilla, the future of the kingdom matters not to me. Let Tiberias take care of my duties while I am here. Just go and pretend as though I am dead already” he looked at her through the holes in the mask, those blue eyes that used to be so filled with happiness when he was a child were now empty and red with tears.
“I can't leave you like this Baldwin” she whispered, pulling him into a hug.
He closed his eyes and for a moment imagined that it was y/n hugging him instead.
“She would have wanted you to be strong and go on. To lead the kingdom as you did when she lived” Sybilla said, not knowing if her words were even getting through to him or not.
Baldwin sighed.
“I'll do my best, dear sister”
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solecize · 9 hours ago
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  𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐆𝐇 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐓 | 𝐣𝐮𝐧𝐠𝐤𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐱 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 (6)
remember lookin' at this room, we loved it 'cause of the light now, i just sit in the dark and wonder if it's time  ten years of being one and the same with jungkook as the country's it couple is the perfect disguise for the reality of a tumultuous relationship hidden behind the scenes. ten years of lies and love and crawling back to one another. once shy, budding first love that blossomed before the weight of fame, the cracks begin to surface amidst your respective rises to stardom and navigation of your twenties. either finding euphoria or the end of the world, there's never any in between in existence for you and jungkook. as you build each other up and break each other down in front of millions of eyes, there is a crossroads ahead with words of "marriage" and "military" looming in the air - all while ignoring the price of fame breathing down your necks. this is the story of love and the lessons learned from the man you made your religion.  and i wouldn't marry me either, a pathological people-pleaser who only wanted you to see her
𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘: jungkook picks up the pieces of the mess he made, as he looks back on his choices and the people he surrounded himself with. 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒: idol!jungkook/female idol!reader and fictional versions of various idols 𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐑𝐄. idol au, on-and-off relationship, angst, i swear there's fluff, fake dating, and themes of first love, growing up, struggles with fame, and marriage (ish) 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒. PLEASE DON'T EXPECT HAPPINESS, portrayal of a toxic couple (implications of emotional abuse and control), both main characters are very flawed, violence, infidelity, foul language, substance use (illegal drugs) 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄. based off of "you're losing me" by taylor swift. this is a fictional portrayal of real-life people that implement some aspects of real-life events. hi welcome back everyone!! it's been a very long time since the last update and i just really wanted to push something out, so hopefully this doesn't seem super rushed because it was important for me to get over my writing slump:) ㅤㅤㅤㅤ   ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ   ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤjoin the taglist here!
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ㅤㅤㅤㅤ   ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ   ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤm.list | previous | next
every mornin' i glared with you with storms in my eyes how can you say that you love someone you can't tell is dyin'?
TOP HEADLINE TODAY: are bts' jungkook and s.iren's nova the new power couple of the entertainment industry? positive reception indicates rare acceptance of idol relationshipㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ
ㅤㅤㅤㅤ   ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ   ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ   may 2018
jungkook was still so young, but as he examined his appearance in the mirror, he couldn’t help but notice the way age settled beneath his skin. one couldn’t tell by first glance, but his eyes were old and tired. it was difficult to remember the last time they lit up with a spark, rather than sitting half lidded and apathetic. his lips were fixed into a permanent frown when he was away from the cameras, despondent like worn out leather. nothing could cut through the fabric, especially not now. he was reminded of this, as his manager read out his schedule for the day and several stylists picked at his dark hair that fell just above his eyes now. his shoulders drooped further when he heard your name amongst the activities laid out for him.
“the red carpet begins at seven, your and y/n’s car will arrive at approximately seven twenty four - not too late, not too early that nobody will be there.”
this was the first public event that the two of you were scheduled to attend as a couple. of course, that was nerve wracking enough, but it didn’t help that you were still giving him the cold shoulder. he didn’t expect anything else and any blame would be misplaced, but it was worrying to look forward to feigning happiness for the cameras. he knew you like the back of his hand and you were a horrible liar. he knew every quirk at the corner of your lips when you smiled and the way a crease formed between your eyebrows when you grew frustrated. jungkook was one of the only people who noticed the way you bit the inside of your cheek when you got nervous and how you looked at people’s ears instead of their eyes when you got shy. 
once upon a time, he would say that it was because you were his. now, you weren’t and he was just some stranger who knew every inch of you with his eyes closed.
jungkook hated himself for what he did to you and what he hated even more was that the world continued to spin regardless. his members, some oblivious to jungkook’s betrayal and others simply just suspicious of his faithfulness to his girlfriend, continued treating their youngest member as usual. seokjin and jimin gave him the hardest time, as the former was genuinely the most disappointed in jungkook and gave him a week-long cold shoulder after yelling at him, while jimin had to bear witness to the dramatic confrontation at hotel azure. however, there was no choice but to simply condemn jungkook’s actions and move on - they were still a unit whose careers relied on each other. they were also brothers at the end of the day and disagreeing with one person wouldn’t break their bond. 
besides, it was clearly a sensitive topic for jungkook, despite the mass of guilt weighing his body down with every breath he took. no one heard from him for days following the dispatch article, presumably locked up in his apartment and drinking his consciousness away. everyone knew about his growing drinking problem, but were shocked to see the extent of it when they finally confronted him.
“i don’t think you should be the one crying and hiding,” muttered hoseok, who led the charge in recovering jungkook after everyone got fed up with him ghosting anyone who tried to reach him.
it was the eldest four of the group who broke into his home, just several hours prior to their flight to tokyo for a weekend-long event. this was after the first few days since the news broke and since anyone saw him in person. seokjin, although refusing to speak to jungkook, brought food for him, while namjoon and hoseok physically dragged him out of bed and yoongi forcibly went through his belongings to pack clothes on his behalf. 
“i’m sorry, i don’t know what’s wrong with me,” was all jungkook could make out and it wasn’t clear if he was referring to the fact that he wasn’t cooperating or the situation with you as a whole. it also wasn’t clear if his hoarse speech was due to being under the influence or from crying. 
yoongi pinched the bridge of his nose, watching his members push jungkook into his washroom to get himself decent. “this. . .this is pathetic,” he said, as there were no other words to describe the scene. 
at least namjoon managed a sympathetic expression on his features. “he keeps saying over and over again that he’s sorry.”
and that was all jungkook knew. that he was sorry. that he had never made such a mistake in his life. he also knew that he had no explanation or excuse, no matter how he rationalized his actions to himself in the past few months. jungkook couldn’t figure out how he even did such a thing, until yoongi stopped him in his tracks, just before the five of them departed jungkook’s apartment. 
jungkook nearly lost balance, as his head hung low as he walked and dragged his suitcase behind him. the others looked on from the hallway, upon noticing that yoongi paused in front of jungkook before he could close the front door behind him.
“your pockets. empty them, kook.”
yoongi knew before jungkook even realized that he brought it along. it was simply second nature and that was the problem. if it was even possible for further shame to illuminate in his dark eyes, jungkook made sure to cut his gaze away to avoid his older friend’s fiery one. without a word of protest, jungkook reached into the side of his jacket and revealed a flask, which he tossed on the floor behind him. 
that was two weeks ago. it wasn’t much to be proud of, but jungkook swore on sobriety since then. 
that meant it was also over two weeks since he saw you in person. even though it felt like forever, he knew it didn’t mean jack shit to you, who he knew hated him. the look in your eyes when you begged your company to not have anything to do with him, was something he could never forget. he wanted to scrub it off his skin until it was raw. the shame jungkook felt overwhelmed him to the point where he knew he wasn’t even worthy to feel guilt. he was embarrassed for the man he became. 
however, the world kept spinning. nobody stopped to care for his problems or his mistakes, especially with the career he chose. jungkook was bts’ jungkook and people were relying on him - his fans, his group members, his company. nobody cared and he didn’t expect anyone to. 
he didn’t care about the world continuing to spin in spite of him - his thoughts were consumed with how you were doing as the sun continued to set and rise amidst your suffering. jungkook couldn’t even bear to look you up on social media or the internet. sure, he would be reminded of the insane predicament that your companies just placed on the two of you, but more importantly, jungkook knew that he had no place checking up on you. he wanted nothing more than to pull you into his arms and weep, to patch up the deep wound he inflicted on you. when your companies made the publicity plan official, jungkook thought it was the heavens above granting him some sort of second chance at winning you back. 
yet, as he waited in a limousine, waiting for your arrival to drive over to this red carpet event, he was nervous. jungkook felt oxygen trapped in his throat, choking on the fear of facing you once more and it burned a deep hole in his body. he didn’t deserve this. you didn’t deserve this. 
over the past two weeks, you didn't know how else to deal with your emotions other than the only way you’d done so for years - by ignoring it and shoving it into the back of your mind. if anyone crossed paths with you, they would simply congratulate you on the successful relationship and ask to say hi to your new public boyfriend. you would plaster on a tight smile and thank the person through your teeth. 
the worst part was that no one even knew. even if they were present on that fateful night at hotel azure, any party attendee who saw the news could only assume that you were merely a spineless coward that crawled back to jungkook despite being publicly betrayed. you were defenseless and all of your walls were broken down.
it was an ironic thing, for the two of you to be so alone in the world and being pushed towards one another at the same time.
anyone could see that something was wrong, but it didn’t matter and no one dared to speak up. your makeup artist’s curious eyes were hard to miss, as she prompted for you to stop furrowing your eyebrows during the application of your foundation, but your pr manager’s cut eye from the corner of the dressing room silenced any questioning.
“how many times did you read it over?”
through gritted teeth, you responded, “seven.”
the stack of papers wedged between a flimsy plastic binder were just about as thick as your wrist and felt heavier that it actually was - likely because you were forced to carry it everywhere you went for the past few days. it was a collection of various documents relating to media and public relations, including the full-length version of your NDA with your company and bighit in relation to your coupling with jungkook. there was also a detailed guide to answering interview questions, how to stand next to one another, social media etiquette, and anything that could ever come up. hell, there was written practice on how to look at one another. 
ms. choi was the special pr manager assigned to all activities and releases concerning your public relationship. you had met her at the meeting with the board of directors at the bighit company building and she reminded you of a math teacher that you used to hate in school. domineering, always looking over your schedule, and sent shivers up and down your spine. she was not someone to be messed with and above all, she was extremely particular about how she wanted things done. anyone would be a fool to cross her - perfect for the role she was hired to do.
she required you to review the binder several times before all public appearances and it was exhausting. you also had an inkling that your beloved didn’t have the same treatment and your suspicions were confirmed when you crossed paths with him for the first time in weeks, bearing no papers or preparation of any kind in his hands.
instead, he was positioned at the farthest corner of the limousine when the door was opened for you, taking his own precautions against you.
jungkook’s stomach dropped when the vehicle came to a stop in front of the familiar sight of your company building. there was a ticking time bomb at the core of his ribs and it was an explosion to be set off as soon as he saw your shadowy figure approach through the tinted windows. even though he’d been doing everything in his power to brace himself, he still flinched when the door swung open.
his entire body turned cold with rage and guilt when his eyes fell on you. he imagined greek goddesses dripping in gold and glowing in divinity throughout the history of time, but they still wouldn’t hold a candle to you. it was difficult to pinpoint the source of such celestial haze - perhaps your appearance long muddled in self-hatred and anger since hotel azure and now a glistening memory being remembered before his very eyes. it was like learning a lost nostalgia, as if it had been more than mere weeks since laying eyes on you. the taste was bitter and he refused to deem himself worthy of such a thing, but if you picked at jungkook’s brain and held him against his will, it would be a whispered confession of falling in love all over again.
in a tint of twinkling champagne, you donned a floor length evening gown with a fitted, mermaid silhouette. the beaded sweetheart neckline hugged your torso and was accentuated with a sharper edge at your clavicle, before creating a bolder figure flaring out into an hourglass shape. your hair was slicked back into a wet look, as loose curls enhanced by waist-length extensions framed your face. the makeup chosen for the look was simple - a nude gloss, soft flush of pink blush and a sharp eyeliner wing. the star of the show was truly your dress, as just a pair of small gold drop earrings were your only accessory. 
thankfully, the dress wore you and not the other way around, as your misery was too loud to not be seen and so, the glamour of your attire created a successful camouflage. if anyone looked at you, they would only see your beauty and not your anguish - a heartbreaking curse on women who chased fame as their body of work. 
the curse almost snuck past jungkook, who initially was struck by your appearance, but then saw the way you bit the inside of your cheek. the way emptiness sunk behind your regard. the way you accidentally locked eyes with him and broke away immediately, as if letting a curse word slip or touching something too hot.
“ten minutes to arrival.” jungkook’s manager cut through the obvious tension in the air, thick as nectar.
you sat opposite of him, pretending to pick at your manicured nails after setting your binder next to you and in between his manager. the space was well-needed, as you could barely acknowledge any of his team in the limousine. 
jungkook replayed this moment prior to your arrival dozens of times in his head and in every version, he couldn’t even sputter out a polite greeting. he had no place. in this timeline, he, too, failed to say hello.
as the next few seconds progressed, those around you and jungkook were shifting in clear discomfort. jungkook wasn’t exactly prepared by any means, as his staff had barely been able to get him to respond with something more than a grunt and nod to any attempted interaction throughout the day. meanwhile, your team was watching you like a hawk, policing you like a child with your every move. 
naturally, someone from your side - thinking that they uncovered the secret key - reached into a compartment and pulled out a pristine bottle of cristal. 
with the hopes of easing the tension-filled air, she looked between the two of you and mused, “first public appearance together. drinks anyone?”
you were reaching for a flute already, even before jungkook could wave off the champagne. he didn’t miss the way several individuals in the car, including his own manager, exchanged shocked expressions at his decline. jungkook never said no to a drink before an event and it wasn’t rare for him to already show up slightly inebriated in the first place. 
for the first time, you willingly looked up at him, also taken aback. before his eyes could blink back to yours, you were already staring out the window and sipping slowly on your champagne. if you allowed yourself to let your thoughts linger too long on jungkook’s rejection of alcohol, it would mean you cared. meanwhile, he assumed you’d already gone through all sorts of emotions, likely the entire seven stages of grief. maybe you finally came to accept that you no longer needed jungkook in your life.
however, there were precisely four moments that altered everything.
moment number one occurred precisely twenty three minutes after your reunion with jungkook. at this point, he’d used up the entire time on the way to the event trying to not appear like he was sulking. thankfully, your managers began explaining the agenda for the night and several, firm reminders of do’s and don’ts for the camera. the conversation filled up the heavy, dreadful space lingering between you two in the car. 
though there was an obvious attempt to not come off as harsh, given the circumstances of clear torment between you, jungkook knew that this night was crucial. the two of you really needed to sell being a couple or face consequences that he couldn’t even imagine. this was your career at the end of the day and its fragile state laid in his hands.
so, before you knew it, the short ride was up and jungkook was greeted by the blinding lights of photographers at every angle possible, even before the car door was fully open. he knew to step out first and structure the perfect gentleman image, as this photo was surely going to be on every social media platform, every homepage, every magazine. the weight of the world rested on his shoulders and the only thing he could do was stretch a pearly white smile across his face.
“jungkook! jungkook, over here!” several reporters called out, ready like a cannon to fire away all the juicy questions in their arsenal since the relationship announcement.
throughout the past two weeks, the youngest member of bts wasn’t all that concerned with the actual publicity of the relationship. he was far too deep into grief to even consider the emotional toll that this new aspect of his job was going to have. he knew that he’d have to spend a generous amount of time with you, which was where the source of his anguish and guilt came from, but he nearly forgot how awful it was dealing with media in general. jungkook should have known that it was only going to get worse in the role he was now forced to play, as your public beau.
“jungkook! how’s y/n?” one reporter kept repeating over and over, wildly waving with one hand to get his attention.
another yelled, “jungkook, how does it feel to be the most searched term with y/n for fifteen days straight?”
while the screams were loud upon jungkook’s appearance, a hushed anticipation floated in the air. some expected other bts members to appear behind him. the crowd couldn’t even dream of the presence of jungkook’s newly official girlfriend, but as soon as one golden heel hit the velvet carpet, the floor nearly rumbled at the volume of yells. 
this time, there was no choice but to hold a fixed gaze for longer than two seconds with one another, as your figure fully emerged from the limousine and met the blinding lights. the real job had begun and it was evident by the sudden smile mirrored on your face. it took jungkook aback, as he had been replaying your devastated expression at hotel azure over and over again for weeks. he was shackled to those memories of tears in your eyes - by the pool, in the elevator, at the bighit building.
“ready?” 
it took a second to process that you were actually talking to him, as he did a double take. you arched a single, perfect eyebrow at him, as if he just told you a funny joke. one thing you always kept up was the fact that you insisted you were the funnier one out of the two of you, often playing the dynamic of a straight man that refused to laugh. 
jungkook realized what you were doing - already portraying a different character for the cameras and it was one of a loving girlfriend that really wasn’t his. despite the heaviness in his chest, he had no choice but to play along, too.
he held out his arm for you and you gladly grasped it, looping your own through. although fans and reporters alike were still screaming at the top of their lungs, the touch of your hand on his arm nearly hurled jungkook back and to the ground. he forgot what it was like, to have your touch and to see your smile. moment one made him forget who he was and where he was, as if he was just yours once again. 
this single, seemingly mundane, snapshot of the night was immortalized within jungkook’s mind. it was a second that transported him back in time, almost mockingly. he decided right then and there that he would be chasing these moments for as long as he could.
there was a certain fear that settled in jungkook’s skin, wondering if he would forever have to deal with your silence behind the scenes or suffering through forced touches in front of the cameras. 
over time, it got better. when forced together in spaces like these, he was still too concerned with walking on eggshells around you to even try anything with you. he was too ashamed to talk to you, to laugh with you. there was always a safe distance between the two of you and jungkook made it a point to be as professional as possible.
the worst part was that he couldn’t read you at all. despite the fact that the two of you knew each other since you were practically kids meant nothing when the only face you wore was that of a stone cold expression. it drove jungkook crazy, especially when you so obviously feigned excitement or love when your job required you to. he watched puppet strings dictate every slight change of expression on your face and it felt like rocks in his stomach. 
this safe distance was easy to maintain when watchful eyes of staff members lingered at every schedule - until they didn’t.
moment two, unlike moment one with you on the red carpet, was approached with fear and uncertainty. jungkook was ill-prepared this time around, having thought that he was looking forward to a rare friday night off when his phone and ms. choi demanded his presence across the city in less than twenty minutes. unlike the jungkook he knew in himself from even just a month prior, he wanted nothing to do with anything if it wasn’t involving laying down in his bed for the whole night.
deep down inside, he knew he wasn’t a party animal. it was nothing he yearned for, but instead, the idea of losing a bit of reality for even just a few hours. down some drinks here, take some pills there. that was the lifestyle he learned from his group of “friends.”
the “friends” was in quotations because there were a select few people in his life that openly declared themselves jungkook’s real friends - his group members, a handful of the 97 line, and others. they were in mostly opposition to the circle that jungkook ran in outside of the, which included bored chaebols, influencers, producers and club promoters with the world at the palm of their hand. they found jungkook to be a cute little idol that could be used for clout. 
namjoon often warned jungkook about the people he surrounded himself with, but it was hard when they stuck to him like glue. it was as if he had his own little minions that enabled jungkook to do whatever he felt, as they crossed paths in every major city in the world. jungkook had his boys in los angeles, his connections in tokyo, the rich heirs of singapore. being constantly on tour and away from home was painful in every sense of the word, but he was able to numb it with the people around him.
that was the beginning of the end when it came to hurting when away from you.
surprisingly, jungkook avoided groupies. it was an easy trap for anyone blinded by the shining lights of fame to get lost in that world - maybe it had to do with his members and their own reservations regarding such a thing. while the company and management were strict, anyone could get their way if they were smart enough about it. regardless, it simply wasn’t the band’s prerogative to hook up with fans. instead, jungkook crumbled under pressure through other means.
it was a friday night like tonight, but he was certainly not laying down in bed. bts was in kyoto and celebrating their head choreographer’s birthday at a dingy, hole in the wall nightclub. the walls reeked of nicotine and it was so small that he couldn’t make two steps in either direction without crashing into someone. jungkook made this very mistake and that’s how she ended up falling into his arms. from there, they laughed it off, drank too much, and ended up in his bed by the end of the night. 
the only reason why it even happened was because you uttered the words that jungkook thought he’d never hear: i hate you. the fight over the phone was about a multitude of things that was exacerbated by the distance placed between you two because of work and the fact that you were under the influence throughout the entire conversation, sipping on gin on the rocks as it progressed and became rowdy by the end of it as a result. you yelled the three words and hung up on jungkook, prompting him to also get completely wasted before attending the birthday party. he thought that was the end of it, as he heard the words that broke his heart in that moment. you were never one to pull your punches when it came to the harshness of your words, even calling him names in the past, but those three words were beyond anything else.
jungkook didn’t expect you to call him the morning after in tears, apologizing and wanting to make it right.
“dude, it’s not a big deal,” kelvin, one of jungkook’s buddies that was next in line to inherit some singaporean tech company, tried convincing him one night. 
at this point, it’d been a few weeks after the affair and he was starting to feel the guilt building. the tour was about to end, which meant coming home to his girlfriend. the feelings only began to haunt jungkook at night, when he stared up at the ceiling of whatever hotel he was staying at that night. they scraped at his insides with metal forks and jolted his senses like electricity when he dwelled too long about the betrayal he committed. 
“besides,” chimed in nina, another member of their inner circle that was sitting a little too close to jungkook. “you’ve been complaining about y/n for how long now?”
she was a tall and pretty model that looked like she was ready to pounce on the chance to be jungkook’s next hypothetical little secret. jungkook never looked at her like that, though. she’d been bordering on inappropriate closeness with him for nearing a year now and you had been warning him of this, which he ignored. then again, that was the way you were with every female that even breathed the same air as him.
admittedly, you were a bit possessive. for instance, there was no way in hell jungkook was allowed to have female friends while in a relationship with you. you had his location, he had yours - not because he was obsessive over it like you were, but because it only seemed fair. there were multiple instances of you picking fights with girls at parties or other social outings because they simply looked in jungkook’s direction. above all else, it was your way or the highway.
jungkook was a people pleaser and it was his fatal flaw that had an even weaker spot when it came to you. you were outgoing and some may call it flirtatious the way you cozied up to men and women. however, you were able to easily soothe your boyfriend with affectionate touches when he got riled up about it and that was that. it was certainly problematic that you were prone to interacting with others that would have upset yourself and that was one of the issues the two of you often fought about. 
“i don’t complain about her,” jungkook began to scoff, but nina rolled her eyes at his response.
“every time you talk about her, it just sounds like you listing off all the ways how she controls your life,” she said. “just keep doing you.”
a few of the others in the group murmured in agreement. he and his friends were enjoying dinner at some fancy french restaurant that jungkook wasn’t particularly fond of, but went along for the sake of everyone else. in front of the entire group, kelvin decided to spill the beans about jungkook’s affair and of course, they all encouraged it. he was a star, everyone had some sort of little secret on the side. it was a rite of passage amongst celebrities, even. meanwhile, like namjoon, you hated his new friends and warned jungkook that they were full of trouble. it was all the more reason for them to validate his actions and encourage him to continue his affair, maybe even pick up on a few more, when they saw you as a nuisance. 
kelvin continued, “like, come on. everyone does it. who cares if it keeps going?”
it made jungkook feel okay. besides, she was there and you were not. it wasn’t just convenient, it was too easy to create her into an outlet to get away from all his feelings and troubles that couldn’t be numbed with liquor and pills. he was able to forget about all the pressures of being an idol - the way his every move was being watched and how the entire world talked about him endlessly. he didn’t have to think so hard about his growing dependence on alcohol. he was able to forget how much he missed his family and the time he lost to be able to be a kid. jungkook was able to forget how much he missed you and how he wasn’t able to protect you from the harshness of real life - being away from each other, the stress of your respective careers, and everything in between. he knew it was wrong to keep going and there was no excuse, but he also knew he was a coward.
his cowardice is what found him in silence as he waited for you in front of your apartment complex tonight, as per the instructions given to him by mrs. choi, and the aforementioned moment two. these next three snapshots frozen in time would finally melt the ice that burned the deepest crevices of your heart: right now, the night in the hotel room during a snowstorm, and the day of your solo debut. 
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volturissideslut · 2 days ago
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Can you do one with george weasley based on But Daddy I love him by Taylor swift
𝕲𝖊𝖔𝖗𝖌𝖊 𝖂𝖊𝖆𝖘𝖑𝖊𝖞
George and ced are two of my fav boys
"Now I'm running with my dress unbuttoned"
Literally. Georges hand clasps at yours desperately as you two bolt down the hallways in fits of giggles. Your faces flush red as you finally make it to his dorm successfully - at least you thought so. Little did you know that professor Snape was well and truly ticked, fed up, and ready to end your antics. He sat at his dest with quil in hand writing a letter home. You and George just lie there in his bed, chattering away, and him roping you into his next silly little scheme
"Screaming "But Daddy I love him!""
Your fathers' response letter didn't tak lone to reach you at all, absolutely at his wit's end, and adamant you leave George in the past and 'grow up'. Back and forth back and forth your letter went, telling him you love George and can't leave him. Ever so the traditionalist, he demands you marry wealth and should look for a partner with better prospects - someone suited for the ministry perhaps. George kisses the back of your neck and you put the letter down.
"I'm having his baby"
But it's summer break now so your forced to go home. Your last year is done and so you don't have the safety of the walls of Hogwarts to protect that spark we call love anymore. You're isolated from George really, ntil one day you blurt out your pregnany. Then your father's song and dance changed, saying you must marry George this instant and not have a baby out of wedlock. You finally see George, but the visit to the burrow is an awkward one with Molly staring at you how she is. Your man just takes you into his arms, glad your back.
"No, I'm not, but you should see your faces"
Georges family are the only people you tell that it was a lie for your freedom, and most of them are relieved, yes. But it ignites something within George, a want he never knew he had, to have you in his own home for him to look after. His business is going well, children loving 'Weasleys Wizard Wheezes', and he uses the money to get you a quaint little flat in London. You help out at the shop sometimes, interviewing for jobs you studied for other times, but little do you know the world grows suspicious.
"I'm telling him to floor it through the fences"
It's not long until your family and the rest of the world found out you told a lie, but with the pre-paid for wedding in a week you were holding out hope that things could still go smoothly. Not so much the case, as your father's and families' recent appearances would suggest. George reaches for a knife from the draw to cut a carrot, the both of you working on dinner together. It's a peaceful bliss, spending time with the one you love. Little chatter fills the air, from him still flirting with you to the both of you testing out awful pick up lines and jokes. He breaks the peace, only for a moment, and asks 'what if we eloped?'
"No, I'm not coming to my senses"
You put down the wooden spoon, and nod with a gentle 'okay'. Words fail you at the moment so you settle for lunging forward into his embrace. Georges arm's wrap around you and pull you tight.
"I know he's crazy but he's the one I want"
First thing in the morning he puts on his suit, and watches longingly as you get all dolled up for him in the mirror. You two get there before it even opens, and by 9:25 on the 18th on March you're legally married. And sure, you'd still have your celebration or 'proper wedding' in a weeks time, but now you were safe to call him yours forever, and nobody could get between that, not a soul. You have a few drinks, and yes it's the morning but you just married so who cares! It's time to celebrate. But them you're right back at home, in your little London flat, George above you and kissing down the nape of your neck. "You ready for some fun, Mrs. Weasley?"
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maleyanderecafe · 3 days ago
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You won't give it to another man, will you? ~ Anthology where your Yandere boyfriend melts you into a mess ~ (Manga)
Created by: Kyo Kitazawa(Art) / Kyo Nue(Art) / Moku Ikuba(Art) / Aya Umemoto(Art) / Uni Okino(Art)
Genre: Fantasy/Smut
This is actually an anthology series and this specific story is called Tashio Interracial Marriage, which is about a demon and a human falling in love. In theory each of these stories has a yandere in them but this one is the only one I can translate for now. It's pretty short but I do like the general idea of it and the kind of implications it has. If you like my translations, please consider tipping me: https://ko-fi.com/lunaslurp
The story starts off with a backstory about a demon that ate villagers. The villagers were able to beat and kill the demon, hanging her body, and in a last ditch effort, the demon gave birth to a child. The villagers raised this child in hopes of using her to ward off demons. Back in present day, Nozumi, the demon child is being stoned by children, and is ultimately saved by a guy named Kuchiki, who is tasked with taking care of him. When going back, he cares for Nozumi by letting her drink his blood, and seems to have been taking care of her ever since she was born. Nozumi is grateful for Kuchiki helping her always, though Kuchiki implies that humans are more demons than actual demons are. We learn that Kuchiki is also an outcast, coming from a family of firestarters. We later see a bunch of villagers looking for her, and upon seeing her and realizing how attractive she is, tries to rape her during the night. They pull off her clothes and tie her up, wanting to cut off her limbs to see if they regrow. Kuchiki is able to save Nozumi and makes her go take a bath in the river while he deals with the villagers. Kuchiki cuts off one of the villager's hands and promises that they will never leave where they are. Later on, we see Kuchiki coming back covered in blood. Nozumi cries and tries to break it off with Kuchiki as she believes that he was hurt because of her and that the two could never be together since she's a demon. Kuchiki ends up confessing to her and once Nozumi finds out that he's not hurt the two start to have sex. We see that Kuchiki is really fed up with the villagers harrassing Nozumi and how she always runs to him when she gets hurt. Seeing as he loves Nozumi, he burns down the village and asks to marry Nozumi afterwards.
Despite it being a oneshot, there's actually quite a lot of good setup for why the villagers hate her and the general theme of humans are the real demon types of things. The idea of killing the demon and raising the child to ward away demons is kind of fun in terms of those ancient villages, especially since the townsfolk really resent her because of her demon heritage. They probably could have just gone the route of raising a child that just ended up being a demon but here we see the kind of reasoning for their hatred, a sort of revenge for the demon that killed their people. Nozumi is in fact the complete opposite of her mother, being the kindest character in the story, happy to even be surviving and even attempting to separate herself from Kuchiki because she doesn't want to hurt him. Even though it would have been really cool to see Nozumi be scary and attempt to scare/eat the villagers it probably would have lessen the general idea of humans are the real demons. Of course, everyone in this village that we see is a terrible person from the children to the adults, including Kuchiki who ends up burning down the whole village near the end. It's kind of interesting seeing how terribly they treat Kuchiki and Nozumi and the kind of retribution that they get in the end, especially since they are still relying on Nozumi to ward away any other demons, which is part of the reason they raised her in the first place.
Kuchiki is the caretaker of Nozumi ever since she was born. His family much like Nozumi was shunned by the village for starting fires, so his point of view of humans (especially after seeing what they do to Nozumi) has never been great, which contrasts with Nozumi who is even thankful that she still lives. Kuchiki always puts the point that the two are more similar than different, given that they are both outsiders to the village, though for different circumstances. Of course seeing the villagers abuse Nozumi like this has led him to be very protective, feeding her his blood so that she can heal and coming to the rescue. This accumulates together after they attempt to rape Nozumi and Kuchiki kills them all in a fire, with his eyes matching Nozumi's red eyes because of the reflection of the fire in them (or I assume-it could also be that he too has become a "demon" like Nozumi). Usually in these smut type stories, they tend to be the "bad guy" since it's their vices that cause a lot of their actions (like jealousy or misinterpretation), though in this case, this is an understandable vengeance towards the village for not only shunning his family but also attempting to rape Nozumi. He is an overprotective yandere foremost, but it also looks like he is the type that is jealous, which is partially why he gets her faced covered with the talisman in the first place.
Overall, a good oneshot story that I quite enjoyed. I'm going to try to get our translator to do the other stories too since it's pretty short. If you like this story, stay tuned because there might be more of them in the future.
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